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Meet ups/where are you?

People to stay/staying over

(79 Posts)
hamster58 Mon 27-Feb-23 18:36:50

Just wondering if I am very odd or whether others feel as a I do…I hate staying over at friend’s houses and don’t much like people staying at mine. This is because if I stay there I worry that my habits-enjoying a bath at night/washing hair daily-doesn’t fit with their habits and if sharing a bathroom inconveniences them, and if they stay with me, it’s the opposite in that I give up my bathroom to them so they can do whatever they like for as long as they like and I then share the shower room. Either way I’m worrying about other people’s comfort and would prefer we all stayed in our own homes overnight or a hotel. Any comments??

Fleurpepper Mon 27-Feb-23 18:48:06

I love visiting friends and have friends over to stay. But we have made installed a new large walk in shower room +WC and sink- as we didn't enjoy sharing.

We have many family and friends who live in all parts of the world, and would never expect them to stay in Hotel.

Grandma70s Mon 27-Feb-23 18:50:07

I completely agree with you. People’s habits and rituals vary so much, and so do the times people do things. What time to go to bed? Get up? You would have to know each other very well for it to be enjoyable.

Grandma70s Mon 27-Feb-23 18:51:09

That was addressed to the OP.

Fleurpepper Mon 27-Feb-23 19:00:24

For me, it is part of the joy. You have visitors, and we all have to adjust, adapt, fit in ...What is the problem with discussing it when they come?

Each to our own- I love visitors.

We are no slaves though, and everyone mucks in. We work on a 1 - 2 - 3 system. We cook one night, we go out the next, they cook the 3rd day, and again. Always works superbly.

Jaxjacky Mon 27-Feb-23 19:00:32

Doesn’t bother us, we only share with friends we know well or family, they fit in with us. If we want to go to bed earlier we explain how to switch things, mainly TV and lights off, they use the main bathroom generally, us the en suite. No problem staying with others either.
Tbh, it doesn’t happen often now, apart from family at Christmas.

crazyH Mon 27-Feb-23 19:04:12

I have always had friends from all over the world, staying over, usually short term, but, some for months. I was much younger then and had a much larger house. These days, the maximum is a long weekend. And, I don’t go far either or stay long.

crazyH Mon 27-Feb-23 19:05:09

I have always had friends from all over the world, staying over, usually short term, but, some, for months. I was much younger then and had a much larger house. These days, the maximum is a long weekend. And, I don’t go far either or stay long

CanadianGran Mon 27-Feb-23 19:08:08

I enjoy having people stay, but then my house is easily set up for it. we have a separate bedroom and bathroom on our lower floor, and ours in on the main floor. Privacy is easily maintained.

I also enjoy the cooking and entertaining when we have the opportunity.

grannyactivist Mon 27-Feb-23 19:17:21

We have people staying with us very often and we just get on with it. We have two en-suites and a family bathroom, plus extra loos, so we simply check who is doing what, where and when in terms of baths and showers. I tend to do the catering and/or host if we take our guests out, but if guests want to cook or treat us to a meal we always accept with thanks.

We rarely stay elsewhere except for visits to two of my sisters and they’re wonderful hosts. When our mother was dying last year I stayed at my youngest sister’s home for weeks and she positively cosseted me. 🤗

Norah Mon 27-Feb-23 19:24:10

We're of the view that hotels exist for reasons - most important reason is for people to have a place to sleep, shower, and have privacy.

AGAA4 Mon 27-Feb-23 19:26:08

When we had our bigger house we had visitors most weekends. It all seemed to work out well and we all enjoyed our time together.
Now I have downsized I can't accommodate more than one couple so I go and stay with them!

Zoejory Mon 27-Feb-23 19:28:08

I totally agree, hamster58

We never stay with anyone or have people staying here.

As Norah rightly says, hotels exist for reasons!

Juliet27 Mon 27-Feb-23 19:28:41

My thoughts too Norah and OP

Fleurpepper Mon 27-Feb-23 19:37:11

Norah

We're of the view that hotels exist for reasons - most important reason is for people to have a place to sleep, shower, and have privacy.

Fair enoug- good that we are all different. Hotels are for when we go away on trips where we have no family and friend, and vice-versa.

varian Mon 27-Feb-23 19:38:40

We love having family and friends to stay and make the most of the fact that we still live in our family house which can accommodate. them We once had 14 at Christmas. At some point we will probably downsize but will miss having visitors.

Pittcity Mon 27-Feb-23 19:41:31

We moved to a smaller house within a 5 minute walk of a Premier Inn to avoid this situation. I'd only stay at the homes of close family.

nexus63 Mon 27-Feb-23 19:42:41

i stay with my dad once a year for about 3/4 weeks, i can hear the but " it's your dad", my dad has been in my life for about 5 years, he was already past 70 when i found him, i am almost 60, as you can imagine with the ages we both have our way of doing things, but it is great to see him, we just try to respect each other and muddle along as it is worth it, i am so glad to get home and he is for me to leave but after a few days we miss each other. if they are good friends that you are happy to see, then a little upset to your routine is worth it. with me, every time i get into the taxi to go home and he waves me off, a little bit of me wonders if that will be the last time i see him so any problems fitting in with each other is worth it.

Germanshepherdsmum Mon 27-Feb-23 19:46:08

I’m with Norah. I don’t enjoy sharing my space.

Cabbie21 Mon 27-Feb-23 19:47:11

The only overnight guest we have had in this house is a grandson, when he was much younger. We don’t really have room, as DH has one double bedroom for his study and I have the little bedroom for my space, though it does have a single bed in it. Downsizing has its advantages, if you don't like having guests to stay.

LRavenscroft Mon 27-Feb-23 20:07:07

I don't stay with people and they don't stay with me because I like to do my own thing most of the time and don't like entertaining and cooking for other people or falling in with their routines. It irritates me. I love staying in a nice hotel and enjoying the room, service and restaurant and perhaps meeting the friends for dinner or brunch.

Oreo Mon 27-Feb-23 22:29:47

We only have a few friends or family that come to stay for a few days, usually in a year maybe three or four visits, just one couple at a time.We have a small house, with one guest bedroom and share the bathroom with them.It always works well and we enjoy them staying with us, and of course we go and stay with them too, now and again.It always feels like a holiday as we go out and about and laugh and talk a lot.

cornergran Mon 27-Feb-23 22:49:08

We have a guest bedroom in our tiny bungalow which is used by family or good friends. People who know us well and of course we know them well. Like oreo we share the bathroom and find ways to make it work. Having said that no one comes for more than 3 nights at a time, it’s my limit as I find constant conversation exhausting no matter how well I know the people involved. It’s the same when we stay with friends. While I enjoy the laughter chatting over meals, wandering out together and generally putting the world to rights I’m not be sad when they leave for their own home or we leave for ours.

Oreo Mon 27-Feb-23 22:59:35

Same here cornergran three nights is just perfect, or even two nights.It’s enough time to be enjoyable for all, then back to a quiet time in our own homes.

Wyllow3 Mon 27-Feb-23 23:14:26

I feel comfy with family but no one else. Anyway, not the space at mine except for one/two family members.

All my family are very easy going messy sorts and its get your own meals except for evening meal and get up when you want and so on.