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Ageism

(98 Posts)
CariGransnet (GNHQ) Wed 18-Dec-13 16:09:54

Looking back over some old threads, we came across this from Carol...

"We can all do our bit to lobby for ageism to be eradicated, and muster strength by numbers with Gransnet. We'll have as big a voice as Mumsnet if we continue like this."

Ageism is something that has come up many times on the forums - be it at work or, well, anywhere else at all.

We would love to know about any experiences you have had. If we can build a picture of what it's really like then perhaps - indeed - we can work together to do something about it.

whenim64 Fri 24-Jan-14 10:16:13

Heard it being discussed just before 9 am and the person being interviewed explained that the figures for lung cancer are compared between 20 to 44, over 65 and over 75. The detail is in how to support very elderly people who might be too frail for the treatment, or caring for a spouse with dementia and struggling with appointments, or other circumstances that weigh against being able to commit to, and receive, treatment that is on offer. Seems that support for accessing treatment is more the issue than the availability of it, and doesn't apply to all types of cancers and treatments.

whenim64 Fri 24-Jan-14 10:17:46

Funny.....what I heard was also on BBC (radio). I wonder if they talk to each other?

rosesarered Fri 24-Jan-14 10:40:46

Phew! whenim64 Glad to hear that they are not delaying cancer treatment on grounds of age! GULP!

whenim64 Fri 24-Jan-14 11:27:38

They might be, roses. They just need to make their minds up which message they are giving us, as there are two different versions of this news floating about today. Lazy journalism again, or someone back-peddling like mad?

FlicketyB Fri 24-Jan-14 16:31:26

Galen I was described as 'bed blocker' when the reason I was blocking a bed was because the hospital had spent 36 hours pushing the minor procedure I had come in for, further and further down the list! It had started as emergency day-surgery!

I told them if that was the case, as the problem was beginning to resolve itself I would discharge myself and go back to my GP's surgery. I was in the operating theatre 45 minutes later. I was then moved down to the private wing (non-paying) to free the bed I was occupying on an emergency ward.

annodomini Fri 24-Jan-14 17:17:42

When I had shoulder surgery I was desperate to go home but they wouldn't let me out before they had contacted Social Services to come and assess me for help of some kind. SS did come but when I found out what it would cost to have their help - £16 per hour, every day which I didn't need - I sent them packing and hired a cleaner from an agency I'd used before.

Galen Fri 24-Jan-14 17:57:38

I couldn't even stand!

margaretm74 Fri 24-Jan-14 18:08:53

It will be compulsory euthanasia next - the ultimate in ageism.

FlicketyB Fri 24-Jan-14 19:45:54

Galen they may have told you, you were a bed blocker but chucking people out who are unfit happens to any age. DD was badly injured in a car accident, her car went over on its side and her right arm was dragged along the tarmac at speed. She did a 50/50 swap of lower arm and tarmac.

She was in hospital 10 days, most of it nil by mouth as she had to have three operations, about 10 hours in surgery in all. The last operation was a very large skin transplant with skin from her thigh. Two hours after she recovered consciousness she was on her way home. They had intended to keep her in overnight but needed her bed. Like you she couldn't even stand.

FlicketyB Fri 24-Jan-14 19:46:23

I should have added she was 38 at the time

Galen Fri 24-Jan-14 20:38:51

I had no one at home. My judge at the tribunal on Thursday, who specialises in medical negligence, told me to write to the CE of the hospital, but I can't type a long letter with my problems.

FlicketyB Sat 25-Jan-14 17:05:39

Now that was bad, and illegal. Can you send him a short email, explaining why you cannot write further and then ask to see him or phone him at an agreed time?

I certainly would not let something like that pass without a complaint.

JessM Sat 25-Jan-14 17:42:48

I am beginning to get quite hacked off with people talking about cancer and reacting to cancer as if it is a single disease. It is a huge category of diseases. Lung cancer is one of the most difficult to treat still. Others have a very high cure rate. Even breast cancer is a wide variety of diseases with varying profiles and cure rates.
Lots of people in their 80s have successful treatment for cancer but I can understand why an oncologist might not recommend a punishing programme of chemotherapy for someone who is already in ill health or very frail.
It sounds like the media picked this up and turned it into a scare story.

FlicketyB Sun 26-Jan-14 14:18:32

JessM I think the point was that over 65s were being refused treatment regardless of their general state of health. It was agreed that if someone was already frail or had multiple health problems aggressive treatment for cancer may not be appropriate, but if someone is otherwise sound in wind and limb the fact that they are over 65 should not mean that they are refused treatment.

A 70 year old friend is currently on the high priority list for a liver transplant as she has liver cancer, but apart from that has no other medical problems. She has been fortunate, but other people in her situation have not even been considered for a transplant, purely on grounds of age,
.

JessM Tue 28-Jan-14 18:31:18

I just had a look at the actual report. As always the press have sensationalised the comment that withholding of treatment may be a factor in the relatively poor outcomes of older cancer patients, and said "it is happening". There is no direct evidence that it is happening as far as I can see and the report acknowledges that there are a number of other factors that may be in play here.
It is not a primary piece of research but does raise some important questions which should be addressed.

Flowerofthewest Tue 28-Jan-14 21:17:26

I just thank goodness that my, then 72 year old - DH was treated with such professionalism and respect when he 'arrested' 18 months ago. I have never seen such wonderful care as he received in ICU. His pneumonia was treated and he made a full recovery. I remember one of his nurses saying to me that he was very lucky that he did have the heart attack before the pneumonia otherwise he would have been straight to the elderly ward where the care was not nearly as intensive as he was getting in the unit is was in.

He has also had absolutely first class treatment for prostate cancer and, hopefully, it is cured now. He has been not been treated as someone at the end of his life and this report did worry me somewhat. We are all living longer now and should received the same medical care as younger people.

DeeS Wed 29-Jan-14 15:03:11

I am 71 and continue to work full time alongside people of all ages. Although my work is mostly on computer and in meetings, I am active and fully engaged in all aspects of my organization's work as part of a "senior" management team. I also swim laps every morning before dawn. So many people assume that we'll all retire as soon as we hit a 'golden age" 65? and I am just not ready. People are often amazed at my age but what was once flattering is now strained to feel I have to justify why I continue to work. I adore our grandson and spend lots of time in my grandmother role but staying in my job also makes that role even more joyous.

JessM Thu 30-Jan-14 07:56:45

Good for you deeS If Rupert Murdoch can keep on trucking why not other people?
I can't really imagine wanting to live the kind of retired life where you just do hobbies and socialising while still sound in mind and limb. Of course if my GKds were nearby I might feel very different.

rosesarered Thu 30-Jan-14 11:46:10

Well, JessM I guess we are all different!I do enjoy the retired lifestyle with hobbies and socialising. Yes, My DGC are nearby, but even if they weren't I would still enjoy the more relaxed lifestyle that not having to work brings. I worked for a lot of years, and think there is more to life than the 9-5 grind. Of course if you really LOVE your work and can still do it to the right standard, then why not continue working? We both enjoy our lifestyle now, relaxed chatty breakfasts, getting up when we feel like it, and sitting reading in the sun or visiting places.
However, this news about age/ treatment is worrying, and although some factors have to be taken into consideration about elderly patients [we are in our sixties and not elderly yet] maybe we would still be treated as elderly?I have seen the hell that some geriatric wards currently are and it makes you shudder.

FlicketyB Fri 31-Jan-14 14:04:29

jessM it doesn't have to be just hobbies and socialising. Many older people do voluntary work. I certainly did. For over 10 years I was using the skillset that powered my career in a completely different environment. It included representing clients at Social Security tribunals so it was as intellectually demanding as my career.

Now I am involved with a local environmental group opposing inappropriate planning applications, from reservoirs and new airports to inappropriate housing developments. I am developing expertise in planning policy and making representations at planning meetings.

I suppose these could both be described as 'hobbies'. There is more to that word than pottering around the garden or tinkering in the shed, enjoyable as both those activities can be.

JessM Sat 01-Feb-14 11:25:15

Yes I know - I usually count that as "work-unpaid" - some of the roles I have done have been both onerous and rewarding (chair of governors, chair of U3A) I am doing more paid work not smile and also vowed to have at least a year off any kind of committee work. NT gardening is a complete contrast - the only tough decisions I have to make are where exactly to place the secateurs. And whether to risk a cuppa out of one of the staff room mugs. grin Doesn't really feel like "work-unpaid" though, feels like an outdoor exercise class in beautiful surroundings and if I don't feel like it I don't have to go.

JessM Sat 01-Feb-14 11:25:45

I am doing more paid work now is what I meant.