Gransnet forums

Other subjects

Are you 'bossy'

(56 Posts)
petallus Wed 12-Mar-14 14:12:26

'A man is boss, a woman is bossy'.

Some women are drawing attention to the way the word 'bossy' is being applied to women who are natural leaders/efficient/assertive/proactive types. They see calling a woman bossy as an attempt to control their behaviour and make them know their place.

I can relate to this. I am fairly proactive by nature and I like to get things done. However, DH is laid back and rarely instigates our little ventures. He can leave a job half done (but on his list) for months.

So I try to chivvy him along (just a little bit).

I am called bossy.

Aka Wed 12-Mar-14 14:14:46

Agree it's a put down.

Lona Wed 12-Mar-14 14:21:38

Yep, I'm bossy. Take it or leave it!

soop Wed 12-Mar-14 14:31:44

grin *Lona

JessM Wed 12-Mar-14 14:36:44

Men have leadership skills even!
Men are often afraid of women in positions of power, or women with dominant personalities. Hence the insult. They don't call Alan Sugar bossy even, do they.

nannyfran Wed 12-Mar-14 14:50:38

Oh petallus, are we married to the same man? I hope you don't get as irritated with yours as I do with mine sometimes! The "list" seems to consist of things I'd like done, mostly!
Having said that, he does have his good points and is very handy for reaching things off high shelves! grin

petallus Wed 12-Mar-14 15:07:14

nannyfran I would guess a lot of us are married to the same man!!

Yes, good for reaching things off high shelves but they have to be reminded several times to do it first grin

petallus Wed 12-Mar-14 15:07:48

In fact, I've bought myself a little kitchen stool to stand on. It only cost a fiver.

glammanana Wed 12-Mar-14 15:12:16

Anything for a quiet life is what you would get from mr.glamma he lets me make any decisions regarding holidays,decorating,what to eat,and is quite happy with his life because I told him he is grin

Penstemmon Wed 12-Mar-14 15:42:32

I agree that the language for the same behaviours displayed by men and women is often different.
Language is powerful and is why when some groups challenge the use of certain words they are often disparaged as 'loony' or 'PC' but used often enough can mold the way we think..hence the big money in advertising!

But yes I am often considered 'bossy' but usually only by men! grin

Penstemmon Wed 12-Mar-14 15:44:45

Oh! i must have inadvertently deleted a sentence as i posted...

after 'PC' it was meant to say 'by those who like the status quo'

annodomini Wed 12-Mar-14 15:44:52

I might have been bossy once, but I'm not now because I have no-one around to 'boss' and when I see the GC they just run rings round me. hmm

Joelise Wed 12-Mar-14 15:49:24

Have to admit to being bossy, but only to get things done !
Have you noticed that women , when speaking forcefully are called strident, whereas men are speaking powerfully !!

Aka Wed 12-Mar-14 16:10:17

petallus do you have to tell your little stool how wonderful it is every time you use it? hmm

merlotgran Wed 12-Mar-14 16:17:21

I have to do everything so I'm allowed to be bossy. grin

petallus Wed 12-Mar-14 16:34:13

Aka No! I think it must be a female stool grin

Aka Wed 12-Mar-14 17:12:27

How do you sex a stool Petallus ?

soop Wed 12-Mar-14 17:13:51

Aka best not to ask...wink

petallus Wed 12-Mar-14 17:31:06

Well, the stool is always 'there' for me, never lets me down and doesn't take up much space.

Aka Wed 12-Mar-14 18:11:08


MargaretX Wed 12-Mar-14 19:20:02

I can be bossy -yes.
I grew up with an older brother who called me 'Bossy Britches' most of the time we were in the same house. He has now died so now no one calls me bossy anymore, as my husband is not one of those men afraid of women who are strong minded . I never would have married one like that after having that brother of mine!
It used to be that women were hysterical if they complained loudly.

rosesarered Wed 12-Mar-14 20:30:36

I think there are only about 5 types of men really, so it's not surprising we all think we may be married to the same man. Men 'suggest things' and women 'nag' [according to them.]The truth is, women are no bossier than men[some men hardly at all and some women hardly at all, some men ultra bossy and ditto some women.] But men are allowed to be assertive aren't they?This is still [in 2014] thought to be somehow un-attractive in women.

DebnCreme Wed 12-Mar-14 20:39:45

I don't think I am bossy blush

granjura Thu 13-Mar-14 09:23:23

I wouldn't use the word 'bossy' - but I am assertive and determined.

Hunt Thu 13-Mar-14 09:35:59

I'm not bossy. I'm an Enabler!