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Are you 'bossy'

(57 Posts)
petallus Wed 12-Mar-14 14:12:26

'A man is boss, a woman is bossy'.

Some women are drawing attention to the way the word 'bossy' is being applied to women who are natural leaders/efficient/assertive/proactive types. They see calling a woman bossy as an attempt to control their behaviour and make them know their place.

I can relate to this. I am fairly proactive by nature and I like to get things done. However, DH is laid back and rarely instigates our little ventures. He can leave a job half done (but on his list) for months.

So I try to chivvy him along (just a little bit).

I am called bossy.

TerriBull Thu 21-Aug-14 09:36:55

Certainly not compared to my granddaughter, 4 years old and an opinion on just about everything. Her baby brother is going to have a very organised life around her, whether he likes it or not!

Gracesgran Thu 21-Aug-14 14:50:29

I wonder what other descriptions are feminine. I have never heard a man called "shrill" for instance.

Bossy is definitely feminine and a put down. I think others might apply that to each and all the women in our family. We are not of course. Like granjura I would call us assertive and determined and I would add that none of us suffer fools as they say. Oh and strong minded would apply but definitely not bossy smile

Nonu Thu 21-Aug-14 14:56:44

Oh I do think SOME men can be SHRILL GRACE,
grin

thatbags Thu 21-Aug-14 15:04:08

At the age of ten or eleven I got told to stop being bossy by my dad across a field. It was my brother, one year older than me, who was doing the bossing being a good leader. I said nothing but I learned something that day. My dad would have been ashamed of himself if I'd told him but I never did.

HollyDaze Thu 21-Aug-14 15:04:52

I have definitely had bouts of bossiness but usually brought about by frustration at other people's inability to get things done; I'm quite happy about it being called 'bossiness' as well (in some situations, someone sometimes has to be the boss - as the word implies).

My husband and children (and a few others, including staff, over the years) have been known to become a tad shrill in their objections.

FlicketyB Thu 21-Aug-14 21:42:34

When I was working I was sent on a management course with about a dozen other managers, male and female. We did a test that measured what type of manager we were by our places on a triangle after the test was marked. Each point of the triangle reflected a management position. Did we lead from the front back or middle. I and one of the men were right up the leading from the front point. We then did a similar test on communicating with staff and I came out as being very participatory and good at communicating. When I commented to the course leader that these two traits of personality seemed at odds he told they weren't because I communicated to persuade. I was assertive/bossy but persuasive.

When I thought about it afterwards I realised he was quite right.