Are you 'bossy'

When I was working I was sent on a management course with about a dozen other managers, male and female. We did a test that measured what type of manager we were by our places on a triangle after the test was marked. Each point of the triangle reflected a management position. Did we lead from the front back or middle. I and one of the men were right up the leading from the front point. We then did a similar test on communicating with staff and I came out as being very participatory and good at communicating. When I commented to the course leader that these two traits of personality seemed at odds he told they weren't because I communicated to persuade. I was assertive/bossy but persuasive.

When I thought about it afterwards I realised he was quite right.

I have definitely had bouts of bossiness but usually brought about by frustration at other people's inability to get things done; I'm quite happy about it being called 'bossiness' as well (in some situations, someone sometimes has to be the boss - as the word implies).

My husband and children (and a few others, including staff, over the years) have been known to become a tad shrill in their objections.

At the age of ten or eleven I got told to stop being bossy by my dad across a field. It was my brother, one year older than me, who was doing the bossing being a good leader. I said nothing but I learned something that day. My dad would have been ashamed of himself if I'd told him but I never did.

Oh I do think SOME men can be SHRILL GRACE,

I wonder what other descriptions are feminine. I have never heard a man called "shrill" for instance.

Bossy is definitely feminine and a put down. I think others might apply that to each and all the women in our family. We are not of course. Like granjura I would call us assertive and determined and I would add that none of us suffer fools as they say. Oh and strong minded would apply but definitely not bossy

Certainly not compared to my granddaughter, 4 years old and an opinion on just about everything. Her baby brother is going to have a very organised life around her, whether he likes it or not!

I am forceful when I feel I need to be. Assertive, proactive, not at all shy, have loads of ideas that I would love other people to at least try before they condemn them, but have a quiet voice. So I can't be accused of being strident, which is probably just as well!

My mother always put me in charge of my sisters, then I would be accused of bossiness as I relayed her wishes. It hurt my feelings, I most certainly didn't want to have to keep an eye on them at all, I wanted to read my books. Maybe bossiness is a minor form of a desire for power. I have no wish for that, just for equality and not to be ignored.

DH has learned is still learning that trying to be 'bossy' with me gets him nowhere.

The word we use to describe DD is uncompromising. Actually it is the word she uses of herself, which is why she has chosen to live happily single. Whether this is bossiness, assertiveness or just being plain awkward I do not know. Again is it genetic?

I'm very bossy. Why wouldn't you be?

Coward!

A'm sayin' nowt!

Could it?

It couldn't possibly be from me!

Dd is VERY BOSSY. Suppose it comes from being a science teacher.

Same here Bags

I'm not bossy but I'm very competent and a good communicator (compared with some other people in my vicinity) so I get lumbered with getting things done. I don't always want to be thus lumbered so sometimes I devise plans to escape from the burden.

I saw a very satisfactory answer to that question on Twitter (or somewhere!) recently: "I'm not bossy, I'm the boss."

Me too Rosequartz I was a mouse before I had the children and then I found my roar! But I don't think I'm bossy, just assertive. Nice word - assertive.
DD1 too is quite bossy - but her DH likes it that way and she too is a manager and a good boss.
DD2 is bossy - but in a quiet way and her DH doesn't realise, neither do the folk she works with. She just seems to usually get her own way.
DS isn't bossy - he says - just masterful!

I'd prefer someone else to make decisions now and again. I've had to assume a bossy/assertive persona or nothing would get done. However, having spent the best part of three days with my 4-year old GD I think I can hand over my mantle to her very soon.

However, being 'bossy' would not make a good boss; DD1 is extremely good at delegating and organising, which is not the same as bossy imo.

I became more assertive but not 'bossy' when I had the DC.
DD1 was a little bit 'bossy' as a child (takes after DH) but that has stood her in good stead - she has to manage a lot of workers and they have (mostly) said that she is the 'best boss they have ever had'.

Thank you FlicketyB for using the word assertive which is how I see myself and if it wasn`t for me we wouldn`t go anywhere or have any friends - need I say more

I am not bossy. I am assertive and can hold my own in predominantly male environments.

my DH is failry bossy and I often rebel - but is "bossy" the same as "controlling?
If so it might become a criminal offence in marriage .
Discussion about it on Radio4 news this am.