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I don't know why this is affecting me so much

(68 Posts)
Anne58 Wed 25-Mar-15 13:13:01

There is a dead deer on the verge by the roadside. It has been there since Sunday.

In itself this is not that unusual, we have a lot of deer around here and inevitably there are casualties on the roads.

But for some reason this is making me feel so very sad. sad I think it's the way it is lying, it isn't flat out, just looks as though it is dozing in the sun, with it's head against it's flank. In an odd way it is quite beautiful, looks as if it might leap up and run off at any minute.

I've had a not so good week with the dreaded depression, so it could be that that is making me over emotional.

Charleygirl Wed 25-Mar-15 13:32:36

phoenix I think that I would feel the same way for the same reasons. Can nobody from the local council remove it? I personally could not face looking at it, I am very sentimental when it comes to animals.

janerowena Wed 25-Mar-15 13:42:43

I'm sorry you feel that way, we have had to become hardened to it, living on the edge of forests as we do. I do remember being quite upset the first time, about 8 years ago. And a few times after that. You can try phoning your highways department, ask them to move it, it might at least make you feel as if you are doing something positive. My rather religious sister said a prayer every time she passed a dead animal around here, in the end she couldn't keep up, she said, in the Spring. So many young and inexperienced little animals. sad I try to see it as, the survival of the fittest.

Now I am more likely to worry about the drivers - DBH had the front taken off my car a few weeks ago when he had to borrow mine. A muntjac ran underneath it. not a big one, thank heavens. Although we have had one leap over a hedge and land on the bonnet. Around a dozen deaths are caused ever year, but the number of deer killed is far higher. We have all sorts of experimental buzzers and lasers and road-calming experimental areas and things going on through the forests, and people say it has got better, but it still happens.

rosesarered Wed 25-Mar-15 13:51:32

I think that the police respond to deer deaths/accidents, Phoenix.Sorry to hear you are having a bad week, depression just seems to come and go for no discernible reason, hope that yours will go away soon.

KatyK Wed 25-Mar-15 14:26:47

Sorry you are feeling low. I have found that when I am feeling really low things affect me differently. Something which shouldn't matter too much make me feel like screaming or weeping buckets. flowers for you.

Anne58 Wed 25-Mar-15 15:16:21

Thank you all.

I have phoned the council, I suppose they will inform some dept. Janerowena we get a lot of them too, massive amount of farmland round here, plus acres and acres of Forestry Commission land.

I'm usually quite pragmatic about it, in fact I am pro culling of deer, as an over abundance does quite a bit of harm to native woodland, as they eat the young saplings that in the natural way of things would grow to replace older trees.

As I said, I think it was as much the position that it was in, looking as though it was dozing rather than dead.

Oh well, I have a friend coming round for supper this evening, so that should give me a bit of a lift!

Eloethan Wed 25-Mar-15 15:19:19

I can quite understand it upsetting you, particularly if you're feeling a bit down.

As you are so creative, do you think putting those emotions into a piece of writing (maybe a poem) might help to dispel the sadness you feel?

Anne58 Wed 25-Mar-15 15:22:02

I have been thinking about it Eloethan , just waiting for some phrases to form that are not hackneyed or cliches. It either will or it won't, if that makes sense?

loopylou Wed 25-Mar-15 17:15:40

Of course that makes sense phoenix, the words have to reflect the mood and the moment.
I know how you feel too, almost anything will have me blubbing at the moment although I'm not (IMO) depressed. It's a culmination of things like the air crash, stressful Uni and hospital work....
Roll on summer, I need some warm sunshine!

Anne58 Wed 25-Mar-15 17:22:45

loopy yes, I think the air crash is in there too, plus a few other personal things that I'm turning over.

I think we all feel better and a bit more positive when the sun is shining, even though it does highlight the fact that the inside of the windows need cleaning and that the furniture could do with a proper polish, plus the paintwork needs washing down, or even

loopylou Wed 25-Mar-15 17:30:27

I know......and an studiously ignoring the jobs needing doing smile
WE need some brain rest........

Anne58 Wed 25-Mar-15 17:53:20

Still thinking about writing something, but all I currently have is a list of words to avoid!

Mishap Wed 25-Mar-15 18:08:52

My OH (who is sometimes depressed) became very sad and angry about a killed pheasant on the road many years ago. It is often the case that those who have an underlying depressive tendency can be unfeasibly upset by apparently small things. I know it happens to me.

Anne58 Wed 25-Mar-15 18:18:03

Mishap your poor OH would be beside himself at present if the sight of dead pheasants upset him, it is very much "dead pheasant season" here at the moment.

But thank you for your post, I think we both know how sometimes it can be the "little" things that set us off. I do hope that it may also work that the smallest nice/good things can lift us too.

I have just spent 10 happy minutes watching from the kitchen window my 2 cats trying to work out the correct approach to adopt with one of neighbours recently let out young cats, very amusing and actually interesting to watch, as the cats display different behaviours.

No "pawsicuffs" just a quite complicated set of manoeveres (never could spell that damn word!)

Mishap Wed 25-Mar-15 18:44:45

We too are surrounded by dead pheasants - I do not know what it was about this one that caused him such distress.

I too hope that little joyous things might also be triggers - in the right direction this time.

MiniMouse Wed 25-Mar-15 19:05:48

A little sunshine to help the words flow phoenix

jinglbellsfrocks Wed 25-Mar-15 19:31:23

I don't think a dead deer would do much to me tbh. Sorry phoenix, but I think that's odd.

rosequartz Wed 25-Mar-15 19:38:29

A deer nearly jumped out onto the bonnet of my car once and it was very frightening, but it veered aside thank goodness.

I hope the Highways people come and clear it away soon; sometimes these things are upsetting because life is getting you down and at other times you can take it in your stride.

Hope you feel better soon flowers

jinglbellsfrocks Wed 25-Mar-15 19:39:18

Oh yes. We've had a deer dent. hmm

durhamjen Wed 25-Mar-15 20:16:00

There is a website called which links directly to the council. You can find out if anyone else has reported the incident. Also, fixmystreet will send your report to whoever needs to know if it is someone other than the council.
They have a map on the site, which you can look at to see where the problems are and whether anything has been done about it. You just need to put in your postcode.

Deedaa Wed 25-Mar-15 21:14:12

Very sad phoenix I think it's the position that does it. I was reduced to tears last year when one of the cats brought in a baby squirrel. I had it curled up in my hand as if it might have woken up at any moment and run off.

rosesarered Thu 26-Mar-15 10:46:10

Yes DJen, that fixmy street site is very useful.

shysal Fri 27-Mar-15 09:23:18

Hope you feel better soon Phoenix, I feel the same when seeing a dead animal which appears uninjured.

I have been affected recently by the news that all the deer are going to be shot in the woodland where I regularly walk. I know I shouldn't, but I have been feeding the muntjac and roe and love watching them. I even have names for them. To my knowledge there are only 7 animals in total in the large area I visit, and would have hoped that it could accommodate this small number without too much damage to this neglected wood.

shysal Fri 27-Mar-15 09:25:33

Durhamjen, thanks for the fix my street tip, have just used it to report street lamps out on a dark local footpath which would have been difficult to describe without the map.

Jaxie Fri 27-Mar-15 14:51:46

Perhaps when we see dead animals it reminds us of our own mortality. The only consolation is that the animal will no longer suffer anguish or pain. Until I kept a cat I had little respect for the natural world; now I have a nervous breakdown if I see a lorry crammed with sheep or cattle on its way to the abattoir. If I had to kill animals for food I should have to go vegetarian -unless my grandchildren were starving - may be then I could do it.