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The F Word

(100 Posts)
mrsgreenfingers56 Tue 20-Aug-19 08:41:24

What do other Gransnetters think? I am fed up of watching a film or something on the TV and we have the F word in so much these days it really gets on my nerves. Am I being a grumpy old woman here? I was always taught it was lack of command of the English language to resort to vile swearing and I really do object. Yes, there is the off button which we do use and I have seen letters complaining to the BBC or whatever and they say free country just turn it off if it offends you. But horrible swearing well it just seems so pointless and mindless. Turned one programme off recently, content was good but the outdoor presenter needed his mouth washing out with washing up liquid. But of course this is just my opinion at the end of the day. What do other people think?

EllanVannin Tue 20-Aug-19 10:34:09

My poor parents would have been hairless at todays society. I'm just glad that they're not here to witness it.

TrendyNannie6 Tue 20-Aug-19 10:34:21

Sadly it’s used every where not just by the young, I don’t like it. But it’s the world we live in, doesn’t make it right though

LJP1 Tue 20-Aug-19 10:39:22

It is a sign of a limited vocabulary - sad but all too frequent.

I'd be mortified if I was reduced to inappropriate words because I did not know anything better!

Happysexagenarian Tue 20-Aug-19 10:45:08

I detest any form of swearing and the F word in particular. There are more than enough words in the English language to be able to express ourselves without resorting to swearing. We never allowed our boys to swear at home and they still don't. It horrifies me to hear very small children (just toddlers!) swearing.

Elliepops Tue 20-Aug-19 10:47:12

I have a friend who uses the f word a lot. We were talking about swearing. She told me that she doesn't swear,I looked at her.
She said,well I only say fuck.
She was serious.

GagaJo Tue 20-Aug-19 10:49:26

lack of command of the English language to resort to vile swearing

Each to their own, re use of the F word / disliking it etc. But I disagree with the above quote from mrsgreenfingers56. English is my teaching subject and my vocab is excellent but I still like to swear on occasion. It's a stress relief and saves me kicking things.

travelsafar Tue 20-Aug-19 10:52:27

I was always told, 'swearing is the sign of a lack of vocabulary'

Sara65 Tue 20-Aug-19 10:54:25

I never heard either of my parents swear at all, and I don’t think I’ve ever heard any of my children swear, definitely not the F Word.

Of course, I’ve no idea what they say when I’m not around!

WadesNan Tue 20-Aug-19 10:56:49

My late DH was a developer and I would often have to visit him on site. The men working there were always careful about the language they used when I was around.

When an architect swore in my presence he found himself surrounded by several brickies all taking him to task for his lack of respect!

RonsGranFranksGran Tue 20-Aug-19 11:09:09

I love all swear words. As a child growing up, we were not even allowed to say ‘Damn’ or ‘Blast’ as our mother deemed it blaspheming, (that on top of the obvious no no’s ‘God’ or ‘Jesus’). The F word is now thought to date back to 1300’s and before this earlier documented reference, certainly to to the 1400’s. I would just thank your lucky stars you don’t get it popping up in Downton or your favourite Jane Austin novel or tv serialisations. I would definitely give the Oscar Winning The Favourite a miss though, if such words offend your sensibilities. I was fairly shocked by the language in that, too low even for me - even after factoring in my tolerance for the bawdy.
I would say to those brought up as l was, swearing was undoubtedly deemed to be ‘common’ along with many other random no no’s. High lighted hair, (streaks in those days), long fingernails, painted fingernails, smoking outside (especially women), going to the pub (especially women) and so it went on. I do have to confess to a real affection for my red telephone (with dial and curly cable - the bring bring one!). I know categorically that it was deemed a shockingly ‘common’ phone. (Cream, two tone brown or two toned green were acceptable in respectable homes.) So for me swearing was that thing that was beyond the pale and therefore something you longed to do. (As was owning a pair of shoes from ‘Happy Harry’s’ instead of ‘Clarkes’!) All that said, l am happy not to swear if it causes offence - and l do check. If someone objects, l happily desist. This is easy for me as l never swore in front of my parents and can turn it on and off at will according to the company l am keeping at the time. As such it is an affectation rather than a habit!

mrsgreenfingers56 Tue 20-Aug-19 11:10:02

Interesting to read the feedback here. I never heard my parents swear or my Grandparents and I think a generation thing like you say Grandmabeach. I honestly think a lack of standards in society basically and then things become more acceptable and we accept it sadly. If I get annoyed "Pickle Pots" does me for a swearing and my great nephew of 10 thought it was very funny when he came out with a swear word and pulled up about it and told him to say "Pickle Pots" instead. He giggled and giggled. Also Grandmabeach we had a similar thing in a hotel at the table across from us. They were effing all the time and my husband very politely and nicely went over and asked them to tone it down. I half expected a mouthful of abuse but they looked at GH in astonishment and say they didn't even realise they were saying it. Well that says a lot then. They did have the good grace and manners finally to say goodbye to us when they left their dining table. I personally think it lets you down speaking with vile swear words.

TiggyW Tue 20-Aug-19 11:14:37

I hate, loathe and detest all swearing - especially f***. It’s the violent connotation I don’t like. I feel sorry for children who are brought up surrounded by swearing and hence don’t know any better.
It’s annoying when the BBC include swearing, since we’re paying for the privilege of being able to switch off if we don’t agree with it!! ?

grandtanteJE65 Tue 20-Aug-19 11:16:57

I too was brought up never to swear, and the rude words, or indeed the polite ones for sex, the genitals and bodily functions were not part of everyday language. I dislike them, but actually find the swear words and blasphemy that were used when I was a child more distressing. Early conditioning, I suppose.

I find it hard to understand that when school prayers have more or less disappeared as inappropriate in multi-cultural society, that we, who do hold religious beliefs, have to accept people using expressions like "God Almighty" or "Jesus Christ" as swear words. Can you imagine the fuss if anyone misused Muhammed or Allah's names like that?

Annaram1 Tue 20-Aug-19 11:17:11

I never swear and never would. If I hit my thumb with a hammer I would probably say "Ow!" My husband never swore either, except once, when dealing on the phone with a particularly offensive and pushy salesperson, who was probably a scammer. My husband was too polite to put the phone down on him and after telling him several times that he was not interested he finally said "Oh, f off." Then he put the phone down. I was shocked and told him off. I hear the f word so often on TV that I am no longer offended, in fact I would be surprised if they can produce a film without using it. I also hear it said in the street, usually by young men.

I don't know the c word, never heard of it.

4allweknow Tue 20-Aug-19 11:18:43

I don't like hearing it. We have become accepting of its use though. With some it's nearly every second word they say to express basically anything. TV and films certainly do not shy away from its use, unfortunately.

Teacheranne Tue 20-Aug-19 11:21:32

My mother, age 86, never swore in front of me but now that she has Alzheimer's, that filter control seems to have gone and her language can be choice at times! I was a bit shocked at first but have to admit that sometimes I have to hide my giggles.

pce612 Tue 20-Aug-19 11:24:58

I think that too much of the F word, or any other swearing on TV or films makes it seem that it is the norm to use it, so it is self perpetuating. Sometimes it is justified to make a point but that doesn't work unless the rest of the script is pretty swear free.
If there was less (or none) in the media, would it lessen in everyday life?
There is a Netflix animated series with fantastic graphics (can't remember what it's called) but the incessant use of the F word (just about every other word, or so it seemed) made it unwatchable for me.
Oh for the days of films with plots and not a swear word in the script.

Chaitriona Tue 20-Aug-19 11:26:19

Language changes over time. Who now says. “God’s blood!”? Religious swearing seems to have decreased in proportion to sexual swearing perhaps saying something about our society but “vulgar” language has always been a part of English. My mother told me that she didn’t know what the f word meant until after she was married. I don’t know what that says about my father! This was because she was protesting about me using it. I would be an example of someone who had a good education but swore, suggesting it isn’t just because people can’t think of any other word to use. Swearing can be quite an effective way of expressing all sorts of things, emphasis, aggression, outrage. It can be used to shock others or identify oneself as a deviant, or part of a group, or draw attention to oneself. It can become a habit. I think men in the past swore a lot but not in front of women. So maybe the f word has become more common because we are less sexist and less inhibited about sex. It has become less forceful, less rude, less shocking. So in some ways less useful for these purposes. Still a lot of older women dislike it here, though. Disliking swearing can also be a way of marking yourself as respectable which may be useful for some people. There can also be a real discomfort if you have been brought up to see it as taboo, especially for women, sexually taboo.

paddyann Tue 20-Aug-19 11:31:00

I dont swear ,Idid once repeat the F word that my sister had heard at school and thought it would be funny if I said it at the dinner table.I was 2.I said it and my aunt made me repeat it so my dad could hear ,He took me away from the table and smacked me .The first and last time he smacked any of us .He sat beside me on the bed and cried with me .

I think seeing him cry affected me more than the smack.No swearing has ever been allowed in my home .There really is no need to use foul language when as someone upthread said there are millions of other words that can make the point just as well .

Luckygirl Tue 20-Aug-19 11:38:54

"Pickle pots" - gosh (note polite expletive!) that is just about as twee as it gets! - finger-down-throat icon required here!

I hate the twee, and would prefer a good old-fashioned swear word.

Mind you, when my children (and now GC) hurt themselves, I tell them to count to 10 and say "knickers" - it makes them laugh and forget they are hurt.

sarahellenwhitney Tue 20-Aug-19 11:41:20

At one time I would not dream of using the F word. My use of 'that' word has now replaced ' damn' but only when in my own company and with incidents like this morning when I knocked over my cup of coffee.

Sara65 Tue 20-Aug-19 11:43:31

Your dad sounds like a nice man Paddyann, I can imagine his reaction to you swearing had quite an affect!

I wouldn’t go as far as to say I’ve never sworn, but I do sometimes wonder, what people who swear constantly say, when they need to express extreme emotion or anger, what’s left to say?

Violettham Tue 20-Aug-19 11:58:10

I am with you there I also hate it spoils programmes for me,

WOODMOUSE49 Tue 20-Aug-19 12:02:03

We were rewatching "Billy Connolly World Tour of Scotland" on TV the other night.

A fellow comedian was commenting on Billy's use of the F word. Billy on his stage performance he talked of the phrase "For F sake" and "What the F " and how it is used. For him, none of it spoken in anger. Frustration maybe!

I was brought up in a household with no swearing heard. I do know now that mum and dad did swear but obviously it was never ever in earshot of us.

I don't swear very much at all. It's a rarity. However, I can listen to Billy Connolly and not get offended. In fact, I love his sense of humour and his style.

I accept that our language continues to change and how we use words. It doesn't mean that like all the changes.

jaylucy I had to look this one up. They fine even if no one has heard the swearing! Prison sentence in extreme cases. There is also a fine in some states if you are seen wearing pink shorts on a Sunday afternoon.

GinJeannie Tue 20-Aug-19 12:04:25

Confess to using the F word when I’m driving! Alone, that is! Oooooh, it relieves all kinds of irritations and frustrations!