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Should I drive again after 15 years?

(62 Posts)
LadyBella Wed 09-Sep-20 09:34:21

I haven't driven for 15 years because DH always buys cars that I feel are too big for me. Have been happy on public transport which is very good in our area. But, because of the virus, I don't fancy buses and trains any more. Never enjoyed driving but wondered if I should buy a small car so I can trundle round the local area. Not sure if I've lost my nerve or how to get confidence back or whether not to bother. I'm dithering.

mokryna Wed 23-Sep-20 15:42:53

I had parked my car in a parking bay by the side of the road only to come back and find it as a write off, as well as two other cars. The young man had been looking for his phone, which had fallen on the floor, while driving.
If I had written off three cars, everyone would have insisted on me, to stop driving! What did people say ‘ Oh he is young, no one was hurt, lack of experience’. He continues to drive.
Older people have experience and common sense, take lessons with a driving instructor and let him decide.

Feelingmyage55 Wed 23-Sep-20 12:12:00

You can rent a dual control car for very little if your DH would tak you out. Maybe he could drive somewhere very quiet for you to practice, then take a few proper lessons. Definitely do it.

Ladyleftfieldlover Wed 23-Sep-20 10:44:52

I can’t imagine not having a car. I passed my test the week before my 21st birthday and consider it one of the best days in my life. I love driving and the few occasions my OH drives me anywhere, sit with my foot practically going through the floor! The longest I went without driving was six weeks after an arm operation. I was itching to get back behind the wheel. So, go for it and maybe have a short refresher course just in case.

TerriBull Wed 23-Sep-20 10:06:44

Yes Callistemon, forgot to add your point about mobile phones, texting at the wheel etc. Maybe because we remember life without them, but I'm going to stick my neck out and say the older demographic are more comfortable being detached for greater periods of time from their phones and are less likely to be faffing about with them whilst behind the wheel.

Callistemon Wed 23-Sep-20 09:59:54

Older drivers are least likely to have taken illegal substances before getting behind the wheel and are least likely to be using mobile phones whilst driving.

Callistemon Wed 23-Sep-20 09:39:09

Bluebelle I'm ready with the ripe tomatoes, so hope you are fit enough to keep ducking.

I have been in cars driven by much younger people but would trust several older drivers I know over and above them.

I certainly wouldn't want to be in a vehicle driven by a reckless young person who is thrilled to have just passed their test and has borrowed Daddy's or Mummy's large and powerful car.

Or someone of any age who thinks 'just one or two drinks' at the pub or at someone's house won't make a difference.
Or someone of any age who has a diagnosed illness which could mean they may have a blackout.

Not everyone 75 or over has health problems.
There are stupid people of all ages.
People under 75 can also have health problems.

TerriBull Wed 23-Sep-20 09:00:02

drink drive

TerriBull Wed 23-Sep-20 08:58:42

An arbitrary age as a cut off point for driving doesn't make a lot of sense. Of course faculties become impaired as people age, but there are incompetent drivers out there of all ages. My husband is over 75 and a far better and skilled driver than I am, or ever was, and I am over 10 years his junior. There's no doubt that some drivers do become doddery and their reflexes are no longer sharp as they should be and they have caused accidents, sometimes fatally. I imagine they are a drop in the ocean statistically compared to the accidents caused by young, and often male drivers, and equally those who drink whilst under the influence of alcohol and drugs, again a far greater number than older people who have or haven't taken their medication. Of course every fatality caused by irresponsible driving is one too many whatever the age. Pulling a number like 75 out of the hat is nonsensical some 75 year olds are super fit and as sharp as a knife just as there are those of the same age who will be decrepit, it's very much a matter of how the individual ages. My late father gave up the car when his Type 1 Diabetes symptoms became a problem around age 75 and my mother no longer wanted to drive anymore when she reached her later years. Similarly my late father in law gave up too when he realised that his driving skills were no longer up to scratch, he was over 90 and had driven well until that time. Some aging drivers will stubbornly continue I know when they are a danger to themselves and others. Nevertheless there are many competent drivers in their 70s and 80s.

BlueBelle Wed 23-Sep-20 07:44:59

Sorry to go against all the positivity on this thread
As a non driver who manages just fine I d say it depends how old you are I believe (and of course I know you ll all beat me with sticks) there should be a cut off age where you can’t drive any more just like there is for starting driving and I think that age should be 75, well there I ve said it now, all you 76 year old brilliant drivers can stick me in the corner and throw ripe tomatoes at me
There are threads and threads on here about creakiness, lack of strength, falls, ill health, forgetfulness, lack of confidence in older age etc etc etc
I know 94 years olds driving I know people with dementia driving and very ill weak people still driving, a lady after a stoke, and the worst one of all a lovely lady of 84 and very poorly with a terminal illness (not cancer) driving her neighbour 8 miles to hospital at 11 pm AFTER taking her sleeping tablet and getting into bed
15 years is a long time to have not done something, buses are great and as safe as houses they have put a lot into keeping them safe, well certainly in my neck of the woods they are even cleaning them all down every time they drive into the bus station
Good luck with whichever decision you make

mokryna Wed 23-Sep-20 07:17:37

biba70

Definitely have some lessons.

I agree. A professional would cover all the driving points and correct any bad habits.

biba70 Tue 22-Sep-20 16:25:46

Definitely have some lessons.

LadyBella Tue 22-Sep-20 16:24:50

Just to let you all know I've bought a small automatic. I have driven it a few times with DH who is very helpful. My confidence is returning. Thank you so much, everyone. I'm sure I'll be fine after a couple more weeks of "training". This morning we did positioning the car at the white line. Tomorrow it's parking.

crazyH Sat 12-Sep-20 01:06:36

Go for an Automatic - it will change your life, as it did mine.

mokryna Sat 12-Sep-20 00:43:44

I am pleased you are going to test drive some cars. Try more than two different makes. . Before I bought my last one I must have tried five different makes. I discovered then, a car I really thought of buying had a small back window and another did not feel secure in the motorway. Choose the one you like and are the most confortable with. My biggest problem was persuading the young sales men in each garage that I wanted a more powerful engine than they thought I needed, as I didn’t just want to poodle around town. Last year I (69) drove from Versailles up and around Scotland, down to Dawlish before Dover and home in my polo.
If you are worried about owning two cars, sell DH’s.

LadyBella Fri 11-Sep-20 21:55:54

Well I've taken the first step. Going to try out 2 cars tomorrow, both automatics. I must say I totally agree with the poster who said to consider the environment. That is what has stopped me from doing this before as I am very concerned about the environment and feel guilty about getting a 2nd car. I also take the point about taxis which is a good one especially bearing in mind all the running costs of a car. But I think I'll give it a try and see how I get on. I'm 70 so it's now or never and perhaps I may drive for another 5 years or so. Like a lot of posters here, I will only drive locally and never on motorways. Feeling nervous but will let you know how I get on. I very much appreciate everyone's helpful and sound advice.

travelsafar Fri 11-Sep-20 13:38:57

I have a small car and am happy driving locally. We don't have to travel far to see family and friends all within a 20 mile radius. I am quite confident but know my limitations. Defo won't drive on a motorway, too many others, it scares me. Longer journeys done by train or coach If going to the airport i would arrange a taxi or pay someone to take and collect me.

claresc0tt Thu 10-Sep-20 20:55:03

I have retired from being a driving instructor with over thirty years of teaching experience. You never forget how to drive, but returning to it again after a long period of time take depends a lot on your age now, how much you drove before and how confident you were then.
Go to a reputable driving school for an assessment in one of their dual controlled cars.

Seajaye Thu 10-Sep-20 20:30:26

My MiL passed her driving test in her fifties and continued to drive until she was in her eighties. She was on her own and it gave her a real sense of freedom as well as the ability to visit her grown up children and grandchildren. As others have said, take some refresher lessons, pick your drive times carefully so you mainly go out quiet times of the day initially, as night driving is usually harder at first, and definately consider an automatic. The Nissan Micra and the Ford Fiesta and Toyota Auris are reliable cars, and all have automatic versions. Make sure you know how the lights and windscreen wipers work even if you don't plan to drive in rain or in the dark. It would be worth getting an insurance quote via a price comparison site as you won't have any no claims bonus but you need to factor in this cost.

Wishing you many happy years of motoring in your little car.

grannyrebel7 Thu 10-Sep-20 20:16:19

Do it! It will do wonders for your confidence as well x

tattynan Thu 10-Sep-20 20:10:02

Taking into account the cost of a car, insurance, tax and petrol a reliable taxi could be an option.

Kathi Thu 10-Sep-20 20:02:36

Two year ago I was involved in an accident and now suffer a TBI. I had to quit driving and now take public transportation or rely on friends. In the past I traveled cross country 3x just me and the dog. I am with the other gals who say take a refresher course and then just drive around the block a few times to get the feel of things again. Then once you're comfortable you can go to the next block etc. Good luck and let us now!

MerylStreep Thu 10-Sep-20 19:55:05

I too love big cars. Agree with you Monica the Volvo estates, wonderful cars to drive.
I enjoyed driving our VW camper. That was also a left hand drive. I can't manage the motohome we have now as I'm 5' and the seat won't go any further forward so I don't feel in control. Although in an emergency I would.

M0nica Thu 10-Sep-20 19:31:18

I have never had a problem with driving big cars, in our case, Volvo and SAAB estate cars, and I am quite sure I could handle a big 4x4 or SUV if required to.

What is it women find so intimidating. Theey all have power steering and adjustable seats and at 5' 4'', now shrunk to 5' 2'', they cause me no problems. I have driven them towing a trailer and the roof rack stacked.

I think too many women feel nervous and then chicken out of trying because there is no loss of face if you do so, while men, nervous or not, have a go and find it not difficult to master a bigger car, anything rather than wimp out and admit they cannot hack it.

Lizzies Thu 10-Sep-20 17:59:24

I am driving again after 30 years. My darling husband made sure that I got a car that I could manage before he passed away. I got it this time last year and obviously I haven’t driven very much in lockdown, but the other week I drove to the coast to spend a week with my family. That’s the furthest I have ever driven and I would do it again. Go for it. You will have so much more freedom.

silverlining48 Thu 10-Sep-20 16:24:32

Our car is an automatic fiesta for the very reason that I am short and dont like big cars. We are both extremely happy with it. If my dh wanted a big car we would have to have two.

Agree with greengran re keeping on driving, I have said in another post that I avoid motorways these days but know how important it is to keep on driving.