Fresh start

No you aren’t being selfish, reassure your Mother that you will still see her and start looking for a new home.
I wish you well.

No, you’re not being selfish. Thirty minutes is nothing, you can’t be at your mum’s beck and call forever. You’ll be in a better place to help her out, if you wish, if you’re happy in the rest of your life.

Good luck with your fresh start!

You are not selfish, do it. I would be encouraging you if you were my daughter. Your mother should put you first and want you happy, if she doesn’t you owe it to yourself and your son.

Agree with Oops and SueD 100%.

You are not,being selfish. I live 30 minutes drive from my Mum, it is really not that far. It is not as if your Mum is alone even.

As a Mum, I would be upset if my Daughter put her life on hold for me.

No, not selfish. If your Mum was in better health would she be more understanding? I wonder if she is simply feeling very vulnerable at the moment. 30 minutes is no time at all. Reassure your Mum as much as you can and please don’t worry. Good luck with finding a new home.

Oh my goodness, you lovely people ❤️❤️ Thank you, I just needed a little strength. ??

I agree with the other posters. You are not being selfish at all, and 30 minutes drive away from your Mum is nothing at all.
Go for it - you deserve it. ?

Go, go, go 30 mins is nothing ...good grief she has a husband you need happiness and just being in a nice little place of your own is brilliant I bet you love your mum to bits but she’s being a little bit selfish as you say nothing will change for her She’s just scared she ll settle when she knows nothing is changing
Enjoy your adventure and good luck

You are not being selfish, and please, do not let your Mum make you feel that you are.

Once she realises that she will still see you, she too will be glad that you have been able to make the change.

I hope your fresh start goes really well. You have obviously put up with a lot over the years. Enjoy your new life!

You are not being selfish.. Your not going to like this bit, I say it with respect but it is your Mum that is being selfish, maybe out of desperation and panic.

Nothing will change, you will still be seeing her every weekend so where is the problem

Being alone isn't all its cracked up go be, especially if you have been with this man for so long

This bit of my in put is a bit personal but if you have stayed together, even though, for the last ten years you haven't been close psychically says alot, there must be something left, whether it be respect or deep real love.

I had trouble with my marriage when my he was still alive and all I kept thinking about was running for the door, getting my own place, starting a fresh. But..looking back now, and if I had my chance again I would work harder make more effort with my husband.

Going from one relationship to a different or new relationship is really just swapping one lot of problems for a different type of problems, because no one is perfect.

Spend some time thinking things through in peace and with an open mind and an open heart, before you make you final decision and move out.

I wish someone had said this to me whilst my husband was still alive..

You are not being selfish. Grab this opportunity with both hands. Good luck. X

No! You are not being selfish at all ! You have your own life to live surely! Your mum has a husband who you say takes good care of her, 30 mins is absolutely nothing! You go and make a life for yourself and your son, and good luck to you,

Yes go! 30 minutes is nothing . If you were my daughter I would encourage you to go and be happy.

My Dad moved 160 miles to be near us in the same town. He's still fifteen minutes away. Thirty is nothing once you're in the car and on your way.

Your mother will soon grow used to you being further away. I was only three miles away and she was upset when we moved a further two miles! It made no difference to the frequency of seeing her and she soon accepted it.

Oops, that should read “... I was only three miles away and my mother was upset...”

Judi1144 you are not being selfish at all. If your Mum wasn't feeling vulnerable having been ill, she would probably be more understanding, and thrilled for you and share in your excitement.

As others have said, she will get used to the idea, and even look forward to a new place that she could visit too (I'm assuming she would be well enough to come to you sometimes).

Good luck!