I feel in much the same place. When my husband retired-in 2011- from a quite stressful job, people asked him what he would do in retirement. His answer was "nothing". I absolutely understood he needed time to unwind and relax, but nearly 8 years on, this is still the case. He gets up late, and immediately picks up his tablet, and spends hours playing solitaire. Then he may-usually though not-shower and shave. Then he's asking what's for lunch. Then on goes the TV from late am til mid afternoon to watch the news, and political programmes. Then flicking through Facebook looking at political posts. Then falls asleep, then goes to the pub for 2 beers. Then comes back in time for tea. Washes up-badly-I always have to wipe down the cooker and counter tops. Then he'll put the TV on, and either chooses what he's going to watch, or passes the remote to me, and then instead he'll surf the net. I am screaming inside, and feel that day by day my spark is dying bit by bit. I have tried to broach this many times, he gets defensive, and it ends up a hideous mess. He won't do anything around the house, I have to remind him of his family birthdays, special events, appointments and deadlines. I have stopped laundering his clothes, he doesn't bother to iron his stuff so consequently looks scruffy. I have even stopped cleaning the house (it's his house) he'll never pick up a duster, vacuum or mop. Hes not stupid, or ill just completely lazy and selfish. In company he pontificates, and hardly listens to others view points, when all I would like is some light hearted humour. I know what my solution probably is, in the early hours I try to balance things out by thinking he doesn't womanise or gamble..small offsets I know... It's got to the point that I don't think I even like him any more. I hate myself for feeling like this, but I'm sure I haven't changed, its him. He's not depressed, he revels in being retired.