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Lovely friends - not!!

(152 Posts)
lippyqueen Thu 01-Oct-20 14:41:47

On Saturday we arranged a meal here in our house with 4 local friends. My husband went to pick them up, only 3 or 4 miles away so that they could have a drink and taxi home. They all wore masks in the car.
Three quarters of the way through the evening the wife of one couple, announced that they had both had a Covid test that day because she was experiencing some symptoms. We were all extremely shocked and surprised to say the least.
They went home and then on Tuesday evening she phoned to say that the test was positive. We are so disappointed and also furious that we have been put in this position. We and the other people are all in isolation just hoping we do not get any symptoms.
These people also had a BBQ on the Sunday to which 2 more couples came. They have put 8 people at risk and their extended families. We have 9 days to go in quarantine. These people were really good (so we thought) friends and we feel very let down by them. We have no idea of how things will go forward. So far we have not been contacted by them and we are just thinking about how to handle it.

Charleygirl5 Thu 01-Oct-20 14:47:30

I would email your so called friends with your thoughts! That really was an extremely irresponsible thing to do especially as you and your husband are also not in your first flush of youth.

That would be the end of a friendship for me. Do they not care?

welbeck Thu 01-Oct-20 14:49:20

nothing you can do now, except cross them off your social list of course.
i wouldn't be going into anyone's house or having anyone in mine.
best to stick to this.
good luck.

lemongrove Thu 01-Oct-20 14:57:06

lippy.....it’s people like this that are spreading the virus, and to think good friends would do this to you is unbelievable.
It’s a difficult one for you to handle if you value their friendship, but whilst Covid is raging I wouldn’t meet them, just phone or email, as they can’t be trusted.Make sure before you meet any other friends that they are ‘clean’.

Grannynannywanny Thu 01-Oct-20 15:16:03

“With friends like these who needs enemies “ springs to mind.
I hope you and your husband remain symptom free lippyqueen

Marydoll Thu 01-Oct-20 15:21:47

I don't understand why you would till want to be friends with them.
They knowingly put you and your husband at risk. They should have declined your invitation and waited until they knew the result of the test.
It's not only irresponsible, its verging on criminal.
No wonder the virus is escalating.

GrannyGravy13 Thu 01-Oct-20 15:29:23

ditto Marydolls post.........I will not post my thoughts as I am a Lady. 🤬🤬🤬

NannyJan53 Thu 01-Oct-20 15:36:50

Words fail me! I cannot understand how anyone would go out and socialise when they are experiencing symptoms, whether they had a test or not! The fact they had a test means they were concerned, but obviously not concerned enough for you, your husband and friends.

Feelingmyage55 Thu 01-Oct-20 15:41:03

Earlier in the week I turned a “friend” away who had flown back to the UK two days previously, after several months abroad. Came back via two major airports and is now sulking. I was worried about “making up” but actually think that they are off my Christmas card list. There was no testing coming back into the UK. I think your friends have, as marydoll mentioned behaved almost criminally. Police are going to visit people who are supposed to be in quarantine. I’d be very tempted to report them but don’t know if I’d be brave enough. How many more people will they infect over the next few days? I hope you stay well.

EllanVannin Thu 01-Oct-20 15:45:36

True friends would never pull off a stunt like that. Cross them off your Christmas card list, they're not worth the price of a stamp.

Chewbacca Thu 01-Oct-20 15:49:17

Good grief, with friends like them, you don't need enemies. Utterly selfish behaviour and definitely not what real friends would do. I'd bin them if I was you.

Oopsadaisy4 Thu 01-Oct-20 15:54:00

I know this isn’t a contest, however, I know of someone who is coming back into this country on Sunday, going into hospital for Chemo on Thursday and then going back to their second home abroad next weekend!

Needless to say we won’t be seeing them and I have asked their relative if she will report them, ‘oh I can’t do that’ she said ‘ * has Cancer‘ .

Oh well, that’s ok then.
Or is it just me being over sensitive or over cautious?

Illte Thu 01-Oct-20 16:00:46

I'm not surprised lippyqueen I've experienced something similar with a friend that I've had for over thirty years.

She invited me round, to the garden for tea, perfectly safe she said.

Then at the end of the telephone invite she let slip that she wasn't feeling quite the thing. Ever since the 30th wedding anniversary she'd been to. 30 of them indoors for the party. But perfectly safe.
Just the people she mixes with anyway.

I said I wouldn't go. She said I was being silly. She's been out and about and has been fine. I've heard nothing and I can't bring myself to phone her.

I accept that some people are risk takers for themselves. But how can they be so careless with others?

I wish some of the "I'm just carrying on as normal" posters would come on and explain their thinking. I really can't understand it.

sodapop Thu 01-Oct-20 16:01:30

I would say exactly what you feel lippyqueen your 'friends' should not have put you in this position, irresponsible to say the least. If this means your relationship is over then so be it, it would be difficult to trust them after that.

Illte Thu 01-Oct-20 16:02:01

She said she's been out and about and has been fine

Jaxjacky Thu 01-Oct-20 16:23:59

Asymptomatic super spreaders and that’s being very polite. I’m trying to be a lady, like GrannyGravy13.

I’d report them and the others mentioned, particularly the ‘health tourist’

AGAA4 Thu 01-Oct-20 16:41:55

People like this couple are extremely irresponsible. They put others lives in danger without a thought.

biba70 Thu 01-Oct-20 16:47:25

wow, hate to say it- but yes, I think I'd report them sad

Luckygirl Thu 01-Oct-20 16:49:47

Good grief - what can they have been thinking of?!

I would be furious with them.

janeainsworth Thu 01-Oct-20 16:49:55

I’m not sure why you’d invite four other people into your house for a meal right now anyway, lippyqueen.
It might not be strictly against the guidance in your area, but it seems a high-risk thing to do, given that it’s known that a high proportion of cases result from contact with other people, indoors, for more than 15 minutes.

tickingbird Thu 01-Oct-20 16:58:21

Quite frankly, I’m astounded. I would certainly let them know how irresponsible they’ve been. I can’t quite get my head around such selfish, stupid behaviour.

Parsley3 Thu 01-Oct-20 17:00:24

What idiots your friends are. I do hope that you have not been infected.

Sparklefizz Thu 01-Oct-20 17:23:18

I receive updates from my Local Authority and they state that if a car share is absolutely essential, the passenger (note, the expectation is that it is only one person, and not 4) must sit in the back whilst wearing a mask and with all windows open throughout the journey.

After the person gets out, the whole car must be thoroughly cleaned.

If lippyqueen's H gave 4 people a lift, then quite honestly that was asking for trouble from the very start, whether masks were worn or not.

I do hope no one has been infected, but it was an extremely high risk thing to invite people from different families into the home where no social distancing would be possible, let alone any further safety precautions.

KseniyaP Thu 01-Oct-20 17:27:53

Mmany people don't take this seriously, this is the first factor, the second is that there are non-infectious forms of covid, this is prescribed in the test results. so recently my friend had been ill with covid (not much) and her husband had nothing, since the form wasn't contagious. they spent all the time in quarantine in the same apartment

Marydoll Thu 01-Oct-20 17:32:58

I have been thinking of the person coming from abroad for chemo, without quarantining.
She is planning to go and receive treatment in a situation where there are highly vulnerable patients, with compromised immune systems. She should be reported
.Who knows, she may be a symptomatic.
Our local cancer treatment unit had to close at the beginning of lockdown, due to a Covid outbreak. A nurse died.
I'm beyond words.😡