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My sister has blocked me

(32 Posts)
Bankhurst Sat 19-Jun-21 12:32:41

My sister and I have never got on particularly well. She is a wealthy Tory supporter, while I am less wealthy, to say the least, and on the left. For many years I have ignored deliberate jibes about the left, and also comments which she doesn’t see as political with which I cannot agree eg Black Lives Matter is a waste of time and their demonstrations just spread COVID. This led to a statements which I found frankly racist, but I didn’t engage with them. I try not to say anything vaguely political at all, but I don’t think she realises that how many statements she makes are arguable. In discussions re the government’s handling of COVID she tended to cut off the conversation with ‘I don’t know anything about that’. She also said of a friends 16 year old severely disabled son whose mother was told his lungs were too compromised to be able to withstand the virus ‘We’ve all got to die some time.’
Now she has blocked me after she got angry when I made a detrimental comment about Prince Philip immediately after his death.
Should I try to do something about this (a letter?) or accept that my, admittedly awkward, relationship with my sister is over?

Peasblossom Sat 19-Jun-21 12:41:41

Unless you can both stay off the political comments and talk about gardens, grandchildren and shopping, you’re probably down to sending cards and funerals 😬

Hithere Sat 19-Jun-21 12:41:46

"My sister and I have never got on particularly well."

That's your answer. Some people are never meant to be friends due to personality incompatibility, different hobbies, dont mesh well together, etc.

What positive things she brings to your life?
Would you be friends with her if she wasnt your sister?

Peasblossom Sat 19-Jun-21 12:42:23

I can’t think what you would actually say in a letter.

tiredoldwoman Sat 19-Jun-21 12:48:35

Leave it for just now , sisters squabbble all the time no matter what age. Past hurts , childhood quarrels etc all affect later life - books have been written about it , I'm sure ! smile
A wee break is what you both need , something out of the blue will bring you together again .

Kali2 Sat 19-Jun-21 12:49:53

Agreed. Writing now could make things worst. Give it time.

BlueBelle Sat 19-Jun-21 12:52:25

I d leave it, at least for now, you don’t have to fall out just leave it to be more casual and when you do say anything keep it totally neutral If she goes up a notch just say you know we ll never agree on that let’s not talk about it, then talk about the weather, shopping, a tv programme anything that you feel won’t rock the boat
You are at opposite ends of the spectrum and won’t ever meet in the middle so don’t keep trying just keep in very very bland

JaneJudge Sat 19-Jun-21 12:54:09

I think it's easier to not have family on facebook or just have them in a separate group for family related matters, if necessary - especially if you are going to talk about politics as it never ends well.

I hope she didn't say the comment about her friends son to her friend. That is incredibly ignorant and unfeeling.

Shelflife Sat 19-Jun-21 12:59:17

Agree to disagree and stay away from politics . You will always have different views so it would be good to ignore your differences and recognize anything you do have in common. Family is very special , I have one sister and we are close but different. I would hate to fall out with her. Hope you can both find something on your sistership to celebrate. I wish you both good luck !

aonk Sat 19-Jun-21 13:16:53

A detrimental comment about Prince Philip especially just after he died would be unforgivable to me.

eazybee Sat 19-Jun-21 13:31:55

I don't find your post endearing so probably best that you just leave the whole subject alone.

greenlady102 Sat 19-Jun-21 13:38:18

what do you want to do?

grandMattie Sat 19-Jun-21 13:40:25

i was sad when I decided, after our mother's death, not to have anything mre to do with my sisters. They both spent their time making horrible, denigrating commnets about me to Mother - which she believed. As for face to face - that was an excerise in keeping my mouth zipped and ears blocked. My children where shocked when they heard them going for me! I would cry for hours after seeing them.
If it is out of loyalty, don't see her. If you genuinely like her company, then carry on. My DH and DCs said cutting my sisters out of my life was one of the best things I did!

sharon103 Sat 19-Jun-21 13:48:02

My mum always used to tell my dad, never talk about about religion or politics when we went out visiting. He used to like to get on his soap box. grin
My sister can't stand Boris, I like him. I respect her opinion, she mine.
Tell your sister that politics is out of the conversations as you don't want to get into any arguments.
Don't worry about it.

Soroptimum Sat 19-Jun-21 13:52:31

aonk

A detrimental comment about Prince Philip especially just after he died would be unforgivable to me.

Unforgivable??!!!

Bankhurst Sat 19-Jun-21 14:03:30

I don’t see the link between you finding the post ‘endearing’ and whether I should leave this alone

BlueBelle Sat 19-Jun-21 14:03:48

Watching a documentary last night about Philip and his night clubbing and possible affairs in the earlier part of their marriage I m only surprised at public adoration

Newatthis Sat 19-Jun-21 14:04:16

There's an old saying - if the person you are talking to doesn't leave you feeling good when you finish the conversation then you should thin k twice about having them in your life. We can choose our friends but not our family. She clearly doesn't want you in her life so sit it out.

Kim19 Sat 19-Jun-21 14:28:38

Could you perhaps give her a very wide berth for a while and let her approach you in future?

JaneJudge Sat 19-Jun-21 14:35:43

Soroptimum

aonk

A detrimental comment about Prince Philip especially just after he died would be unforgivable to me.

Unforgivable??!!!

I stopped talking to one of my Aunt's after she was horrible about Janette Krankie

Lucca Sat 19-Jun-21 14:38:31

Bankhurst

I don’t see the link between you finding the post ‘endearing’ and whether I should leave this alone

Nor do I.

I’d leave it. There are worse things than not meeting up with your sister ! You can’t choose your relatives….

Lucca Sat 19-Jun-21 14:39:47

Soroptimum

aonk

A detrimental comment about Prince Philip especially just after he died would be unforgivable to me.

Unforgivable??!!!

My reaction too !

Madgran77 Sat 19-Jun-21 14:41:13

A detrimental comment about Prince Philip especially just after he died would be unforgivable to me

confused

Lucca Sat 19-Jun-21 14:42:12

aonk

A detrimental comment about Prince Philip especially just after he died would be unforgivable to me.

Why ? Was he a relative ?

Grammaretto Sat 19-Jun-21 14:46:22

She blocked you so she can unblock you.
I wouldn't rush back into the old ways while feelings are still running high.
Once the last parent goes, your siblings have known you for longer than anyone else and that counts for a lot.

I have friends whose politics are different, whose lifestyles are different but we still like and appreciate eachother. Friendship can reach beyond the arcane.