Gransnet forums

Work/volunteering

My line manager puts me down

(17 Posts)
AliceS Mon 20-Jun-22 01:31:59

Okay well I have a very 'up and down' relationship with my new line manager. I started a week or two before him. He appears to be doing a lot of micromanaging, following me around on site quite literally behind my back as I walk. The other day he put me down in front of a colleague because he couldn't make out a message I had written out, remarking 'can't you read or write?' Normally I don't rise to the bait, but as he said that on duty in front of another colleague I calmly said 'yeah - that's what got me into three universities'. Do you think I'm being oversensitive to a bit of banter or do you think it's something else (ie. he's threatened in some way)

lemsip Mon 20-Jun-22 05:06:44

had a similar situation some years ago.....a person was always lauding it in the workplace.....she said of me.......'I'll leave you alone 'cause you 'bite back'...
what's needed is a few sharp words.... short and sharp and carry on with job in hand! ..........not a long sentence of universities etc.

MawtheMerrier Mon 20-Jun-22 06:22:52

Right to stamp on it immediately- well done.👏👏
Harmless banter? I don't think so- more like his own feelings of inadequacy . I'd definitely keep an eye on him (and a record of any further instances)

denbylover Mon 20-Jun-22 07:33:05

You handled that perfectly. You’ve got to stand up to people like this, often they’re the sort who can give it but can’t take it.

Knittingnovice Fri 24-Jun-22 06:46:44

It wasn't acceptable for your manager to say that. Saying I don't understand this is OK, but saying can't you read or write isn't. I wish I could think of great answers on the spot like you

Knittingnovice Fri 24-Jun-22 06:49:37

Micromanaging is harder to deal with and is so frustrating. Hopefully as he learns the job he will be better. My feeling is that anyone who puts you down like that is insecure, and micromanaging is a form of insecurity so it may not stop. Hopefully I'm wrong and basing it on a previous manager I had.

Blondiescot Fri 24-Jun-22 08:03:30

I've been in exactly the same position with my job. I love the work itself and the staff, but my immediate line manager is very guilty of micromanaging. In fact, although she is good at the job itself, her people skills are seriously lacking. It had got to the stage where I dreaded seeing her number coming up on my phone - so yesterday, after another telephone call where she picked fault with everything I do, I came off the phone and promptly wrote my letter of resignation. It will be waiting on her desk when she arrives this morning. And I slept better last night than I have done in a long time.

PerserverencePays Fri 24-Jun-22 08:16:42

I would post this on Mumsnet for advice and you’ll get lots of no nonsense solutions from the vipers!

Nannagarra Fri 24-Jun-22 08:35:21

This. ^

Knittingnovice Sat 25-Jun-22 09:06:54

Blondiescot I'm sorry you got to the point of leaving. Unless you have been through micromanaging, it's hard to realise how demoralising and demotivating it is.

Good for you for resigning and I hope you get a better job soon.

Blondiescot Mon 27-Jun-22 13:49:58

Knittingnovice - thank you. I just had one of those 'light bulb' moments when I realised that life is too short to spend it in a job which is starting to affect your mental health.

LucyLocket55 Mon 27-Jun-22 15:50:03

Blondiescot - same happened with me after 15 years of doing a tough job. New line manager who also wanted to micromanage everything and after 2 years I finally snapped, had a verbal disagreement with her , sat in my office and though ‘I really don’t have to take this any more’ and resigned the next day (immediate resignation), tough for a couple of months but 5 years on and I’m back to the old me.

Blondiescot Mon 27-Jun-22 17:46:38

LucyLocket55 - good for you. I think you don't even realise what an effect it's being having on you until afterwards. When I told my daughter I'd resigned, she asked how I was feeling and I actually had to admit I felt relieved I'd done it and she said 'well you made the right decision then'.

Deedaa Mon 27-Jun-22 17:56:50

This seems to be a common problem. My son has had a procession of line managers none of whom seem very good at the job but do seem to be good at irritating the workers and causing a constant trickle of resignations. In the most successful businesses I've worked for very little management has been needed. If the staff know what they are doing departments can pretty much run themselves.

nexus63 Mon 27-Jun-22 18:01:06

i worked in the laundry or a nursing home years ago, as it was sat/sun i was on my own, i got all the work done and never left anything for the monday shift to catch up on, the manager would come downstairs and just sit and watch me, she would not talk just sit there, it was getting annoying and i snapped one day as i was taking a load of clothes from the dryer, i gave her the basket and said...no point in you just sitting there, can you fold these clothes and remember to look at the names and put them in the correct pile please, she stopped coming down and a few weeks later asked if i would like a full time job in the laundry as she was getting rid of the two members she already had......i said no.

biglouis Thu 07-Jul-22 12:06:23

I agree with the "short sharp shock". I was once talked down to by a manager in front of colleagues. I took him into a private office and gave him a few sharp words about how to manage staff. I told him if it happened again I would raise a formal gievance with the organization (a university). I deliverd the words with a real "edge" to my voice as if I were the person in charge. It never happened again and that manager was walking on eggshells around me from then on.

biglouis Thu 07-Jul-22 12:09:15

When I was a manager (I ran a library) I left my team to manage the routine work themselves under the direction of a more senior assistant. I would only intervene if things seemed to be getting behind or something unexpected happened. I rarely had to do this.