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AIBU

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(21 Posts)
Bubu Thu 12-May-11 09:48:57

Hi All smile

Im a Granny to be ( due date 14th Nov 2011 ) !!!

Any advice on being a "GRANNY TO BE" !!!!

thanks

glassortwo Thu 12-May-11 10:05:29

Hi Bubu nice to meet you, only advice I can give is enjoy every second of being a Granny. smile

NanaJosie Thu 12-May-11 11:00:32

Hello Bubu. I'm a granny 8 times over and a great granny too. The only advice I woul give is not to give advice to your son or daughter unless they ask for it. And never criticise the way they pick the baby up, change the nappies, put him/her down to sleep, or anything else that they might do differently from the way you did it. And just enjoy your grandchild. They are little for such a short time.

shrimp61 Thu 12-May-11 12:11:22

Im new also,
Gran of 2 fab boys, I learnt as I stumbled along, but like glassortwo enjoy them so much. One tip eldest grandson is 5 and I really have to watch what I say around him he doesn,t miss a trick and will come out with stuff when I,m least expecting it.

P.S. Hello to everyone

MrsJamJam Thu 12-May-11 12:30:08

Totally agree that any 'suggestions' should be carefully vetted mentally before you open your mouth! (And for me that is incredibly hard, but I am improving)

I've decided that my main role as a doting grandma is to give all the children happy memories of their childhood. These are often the simplest things like giving them a bit load of cardboard boxes and letting them play all afternoon. In Feb with dark evenings we created a night time adventure (it was actually 6.30pm). We live in an area without streetlights and we packed up snacks, armed ourselves with torches and a candle lantern on a stick and walked about 500yards down our lane listening to the owl, the sheep and a hedgehog in the undergrowth - and the sound of the stream running under the bridge. Then we came home and had hot chocolate before bed. Wonderful.

I am convinced that happy memories do not have to mean expensive theme parks. smile

glassortwo Thu 12-May-11 12:39:26

Thats what childhood memories are made of, I hope that my GC remember me for some of the wild and wonderful adventures we had, and recall them to their DC when the time comes and I will be long gone.

glammanana Thu 12-May-11 15:54:18

We would camp in the back garden and have mid-night feasts (DD
was never aware that we stayed up so late,we used to go fishing in
the local pond for the Loch Ness monster ,but we never caught him!
all the camping out finished when we downsized to this apartment,but
the memories are to treasure and my DGSs still talk about the
monster even though they are at Uni,I dont think they believed me
somehow

Bubu you will love it.

Michael Thu 12-May-11 17:55:23

Hi Bubu,
My advice is Don't try telling the mother how to bring up Her Baby. Remember it was you who brought Her up,and she has her memories. Good and Bad.

Supernan Thu 12-May-11 18:05:23

Be prepared to fall head over heels in love!!

supernana Fri 13-May-11 12:40:55

Supernan...how true is that! Best wishes from supernana

maxgran Fri 13-May-11 14:09:55

Advice ?
Help out when you can
Do not tell your son/daughter what to do but advise IF asked.
Share stories and experiences when appropriate.
Reassure them they are doing well as parents.

I have rediscovered the child in me since I have had grandchildren,.. I see the world through their eyes when we are together and they think of me as their friend. I never had time to enjoy my children so the grandchildren are like a reward !
My Grandson who is 4 is always asking me to come and play with him,.. which is so lovely !

I was with my daughter when she gave birth to my first grandchild and I sobbed like a child,.. I have never felt so emotional - I am not usually an emotional type !
Congratulations on being a granny to be ! Enjoy every minute !

Mags3 Fri 13-May-11 15:18:47

Hello I'm new to this site today!
I longed to be a Granny but had to wait until I was 56 years 'young'
I've now been a Granny for 11 years and oh my how those years have flown. Two of my 'little ones' live in Aus. so that's hard but we skype and I get texts saying "Hi Gran LUV U" or '" Hi Gran thnkn of U" which is lovely. My eleven year old Grandaughter, who lives near to me, now keeps me right on all manner of things and laughs when I forget what I was going to say or when I repeat something I've already told her!! I just tell her she'll be old herself one day!
I always say to new grandparents
" WELCOME TO THE BEST CLUB IN THE WORLD"
I must dash now, off to pick Alicia up from school as her Mum and Dad are away for the day. Byeeeeee

GreyHairedWorrier Fri 13-May-11 15:20:24

Don't buy a DVD about swaddling a fractious baby off to sleep (as reccommended in a thread on MN) and watch it with the new parents - according to The Other Gran this is implying that her daughter is a bad mum.

<mad bitch emoticon>

She Fri 13-May-11 19:25:34

Oh joy, another Gran in the making! Congratulations Bubu. I only have one grandchild, a boy who will be 16 on Sunday, bless his little size 8 cotton socks. I have been very lucky in being allowed to be much involved in his life and, I hope, this will continue. I agree witn all the lovely ladies' comments and will add my little bit. New parents of a first child are often hit hard very soon by the responsibility. Just be there when needed, and you will be! A few hugs never go amiss either, for both parents. Enjoy it all Gran-in-waiting. Just think, you will soon be able to do all the things you enjoyed or wanted to do as a child, with your grandchild of course, without anyone giving you funny looks. Do let us know when the little one arrives.

Doris Fri 13-May-11 20:23:30

When we were asked to care for our GD 2/3 days each week I asked my DIL what were 'her rules' that we would stick by them, but also to be aware that we also had our house rules. Fortunately, we were all in agreement, so caring was second nature. The only difference between bringing up our own children and looking after our GD is that we now have all the time in the world, don't care about the mess and are going through our own second childhood. Playing doctors, dentists, tents in the sitting room, picnics in the car (if raining) pirates in the dining room - making all the costumes of course - baking and washing up which ends in soap fights - you should see the state of the kitchen after THAT one! and once they have a command of speech, the most hysterical things that you overhear when they are playing on their own..............Have a Ball! grin

hollie57 Fri 27-May-11 21:21:54

hi everyone,
I need to hear other nanny's thoughts on my problem I have 2 lovely grandsons age 5 & 9 who I always treat equally and love to bits recently I have had a slight upset with my daughter because my eldest grandson would like to come for a sleep over in the summer holidays for a couple of days without his younger brother so he can have a bit of a break and undivided attention I said that this would be lovely and I would have the younger grandson on his own a couple of weeks later but my daughter
was very cross with the idea and said no my oldest grandson is very upset and I am at a loss as too what I have done wrong.My oldest grandson and me are very close because I used to look after him when he was born because my daughter was working then,but is at home now,also the little one is not keen to stay yet.(mummy sick)any suggestions would be welcome.sad

Heather Fri 27-May-11 22:34:52

hollie57,
I think you should be able to talk again to your daughter about this subject. She is not wanting anyone to be 'favourite' which I can understand but you can repeat to her that you would love to do the same with the 2nd when he is ready. Surely they have their own friends etc., the elder one is probably having play-after-school, parties and sleep-overs without his brother (the younger one may already be having these things too, of course) and it's good (and important) that, whilst they know they are brothers and do things together, they also have their own personalities / friends / relationships with people.
I would try again as there are only benefits all around if this goes ahead - you get quality time with one of the boys staying with you and she gets quality time with the one staying at home!

hollie57 Sat 28-May-11 15:27:31

thanks heather for your advice that is exactly how I felt all I have to do is wait a while to give my daughter time to think things through and maybe she will have a change of heart.lol hollie57.smile

nanafrancis Sat 28-May-11 16:25:00

Hello to bubu, shrimp61 & mags3!

Absolutely agree with all the comments about how wonderful it is to have grandchildren and all the things you should/shouldn't do.
If I'm ever tempted to say anything, I always think of my mother saying 'we never did it like that in my day' and how mad it made me feel at the time - result - I keep quiet!!.

happynan Tue 31-May-11 13:47:40

Totally agree with MrsJamJam and glammanana, memories cannot be bought only made. At my nieces 21st birthday recently I overheard her and her cousins all talking about the things my mum did with them when they went to her house, about how she would put up a tent in the garden and put lots of paper and crayons in for them, then they would have a tea-party. My mum has been a wonderful nan always giving her time equally to all her grandchildren I only hope I can be as good a nannie to my grandson.

greenmossgiel Tue 31-May-11 15:47:36

Hello BuBu I'm new too - just joined yesterday! When that wee tot comes along you'll be absolutely smitten! The love you'll feel is overwhelming! I've found that by agreeing with the new mum and dad about the way they're 'bringing up baby', and offering support, whether in word or deed, when they need it, (but not when they don't!) makes it easier for everyone. Remember how we used to feel when our own mums/mothers-in-law used to to say, "Well, I always used to do it this way" ? How the hackles would rise!! Enjoy yourself (and what a lovely Christmas you'll have!!)