Poor you. I think maybe you need to work out which of the problems you can do something about and which you can't and make a list [I'm a great believer in lists]. I understand how you feel about your son as the same thing happened with mine. When he was on his own after the split all I wanted was for him to be happy again but now he is I never see him [well, hardly ever]. At least your daughter is with a group of friends who, I assume know about the problem she has [although, can't believe her doctor hasn't done more to help; has she had an ecg?]. She needs to make sure she keeps herself well hydrated .And, if you sister has got a lump in her kidney the chances are that she could have that kidney taken out; a relative of mine had a tumour in his kidney and [touch wood] had that kidney removed years ago and is fine now. Age Concern [or whatever they're called now] and the Red Cross may be people to help you with your mum. And we're always here to listen .
The next thread for friendship, advice and support if estrangement has affected your life