to be annoyed at old people being ripped off

vampirequeen I think you and your husband are doing a great job and I agree with you that the old people should have some say in what trips are taken. I did wonder if your idea of dropping some people off at one place and then dropping others off somewhere else might complicate things a bit.

I feel that going to a shopping centre or a garden centre is perhaps OK occasionally but not on a regular basis. I don't know why these sorts of trips always seem to include some sort of shopping centre. When I took mum on a coach/hotel break, it included 2 trips out. One of the stops was at a shopping "outlet" which was of absolutely no interest to either of us. Another was at a a fairly uninteresting town where the coach dropped the passengers (mostly elderly) off on a steep hill so that most of them just went into the nearest coffee shop for an hour or so. Yet when we got to Lyme Regis - somewhere where we would all have enjoyed spending more time - we only had 2 hours.

I know volunteers shouldn't expect a "return" for what they do but I don't think it's unreasonable that the drivers get a free meal, as long as the lunches for paying customers are fairly good value and enjoyable.

As absent and petallus said, although some of the trips the other drivers do don't sound ideal, they are probably better than nothing. As long as you and your husband are there to provide the occasional interesting and imaginative trip, I'm sure it will be much appreciated and give people something different to look forward to.

I hope there are others like you around somewhere, at other homes.

That's a real compliment VQ.

We were invited to the group's Christmas Party today. When we arrived there was a ripple around the room as people said things like, "Ooooh that's **" He's the driver that the others talked about." Celebrity status at last

We discussed our concerns with the centre manager. She agreed and said she felt the same way but was worried that the drivers may decide not to volunteer anymore. Seems a shame that they're being held to ransom like this.

She also said she didn't know how to please so many people. DH suggested that we take them on trips where we can drop the shoppers off at one place and take the others elsewhere. She asked how that could be done so he explained we could go to Skipton on market day, leave the shoppers there for a few hours and take the others to Embsay Railway. They could ride the train and we could collect them at the end of the line then take them on to Bolton Abbey. By the time they'd had a wander around and a cup of tea it would be time to return to Skipton, collect the shoppers and drive home.

She said she didn't want to be horrible but she sort of hoped DH would lose his job so he could do more trips as when she gets feedback at the next coffee morning people who have been with us are so happy.

I only go to them to buy plants. Mind you, in another 20 years I shall probably be joining them. We occasionally stop off at a huge one between here and Wisley when we go there for the day. There is often a busload of pensioners in there. I always thought they were on their way to somewhere, I hadn't realised they were already there!

Our local garden centre has owls, ducks, and chickens. The owls are a big draw.

Garden centres have all sorts of things as well as plants, janerowena - ornaments, silk flowers, wall plaques, birthday cards, scented candles etc.

Or look at the flowers!

I'm intrigued by what the people do at garden centres if they have nowhere to plant out their plants.

I wonder if they just want to go somewhere safe where they can sit and 'people watch'.

It would be useful to hold a meeting with the old people, volunteer drivers and the centre manager to see a) what the old people would like to do on their outings and b) how possible this would be in terms of practicality, expense and people still being willing to continue to volunteer.

Other small matters like free coffees, whip rounds and whether shopping can be done at the garden centres could also be discussed.

At least it would all be out in the open.

I've just moved to sheltered accommodation and they have trips out once a month to shopping centres or garden centres where they would spend up to 3 hours!!!! That's all the 'old' people want to do they aren't interested in going to the theatre or cinema or even visiting historical places....

Maybe you just need to do it. Just go.

If DH loses his job which unfortunately seems likely we will be able to drive them more often. We thought we might take in a lot of leaflets for things to do in the area so they can chat over coffee about where they'd like to go. We also thought we'd ask if any would like to simply go to the cinema sometimes when it's just an afternoon trip. If they want to that's fine. If they don't then we won't do it. I know you can't please all the people all the time but atm no one is happy except the drivers and that can't be right.

When we took them to Oxenhope (Keighley and Worth Valley Railway) for an hour as an extra on one trip a lot of them wanted to go on the steam trains. We suggested a trip that would take them all the Oxenhope for the first train of the day and meet them from the last. Then they could buy whatever type of ticket they wanted. Some might want to go to Haworth, others to Keighley, whilst others might want buy a day rover ticket and discover all the little stations and museums along the route. They were very keen so DH suggested it to the centre manager. Needless to say nothing has come of it.

Good for you! That could be any of us one day and I would so like to believe that "what goes around, comes around"!

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When they came back to the bus I commented on how much they liked shopping as they’d been to Leeds, Barnsley and now York Designer Outlet for 4 hours each time.

“Oh no,” they said, “we hate shopping but we go where they decide because after all it’s a day out.”
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The dilemma of how to choose where to go? The old folk could be asked to give suggestions of what they would like and the centre manager could make decisions based on the suggestions, instead of on the preference of themself and the drivers.

Well I can see you feel strongly about it!

Why should they expect to get anything out of volunteering? I thought volunteering meant that you gave up your time for free with no expectation of any gain or reward.

I don't think my standards are higher than normal. If you say you'll take people on a day out then you should at least try to take them to places they'd like to go and not just to places you want/need to go to.

Why shouldn't the old people have a say in where they go and where/how they spend their money? They may be elderly but they're still entitled to have opinions. The problem atm is that they're going on trips to places they don't particularly want to go to because as one said, "It's a day out." They pay at least £7 for each trip and deserve better.

The fear that the other drivers may drop out if they have to please the passengers rather than themselves means that they can do anything they like because no one dare complain.

I wouldn't call the other drivers sharks. I can't see that they are getting all that much out of the situation except for a free coffee and cheap lunch.

That in itself wouldn't be enough incentive for me to give up my time to take the old folk out if I wasn't already doing it out of the goodness of my heart.

As for the old folk being able to chose where to go or whether or not to have a lunch, it might turn out to be a long winded process getting everyone to agree and then, what, vote on it. I bet some would still feel disgruntled if they didn't get their choice.

You can't really count the collection as a rip-off because the old folk insist on that.

I wonder, vampirequeen if it is just that your standards are higher than normal. It sounds as though the old folk have an especially good time when they are out with you and your DH.

It would be a shame if the other drivers took umbrage and dropped out.

The centre manager must be getting something out of it or is he so brain dead he doesn't realise that the pensioners are taken advantage of?

There is a nursing home around here and they don't have enough volunteers to take the people out and about. They go out for meals etc so I have volunteered to help out. I only had to be asked and was happy to volunteer. I am sure there would be more people like you and your H that would volunteer to drive too VQ, and the sharks could bugger off. I have to say in Australia this tipping thing is not so out of hand. A volunteer driver is exactly that and shouldn't expect to be paid.

Volunteer drivers who behave in that way could be likely to decide they won't do it any more if they don't get what they want, and that could leave the old people high & dry, which is probably why no-one wants to say anything.

I hope you can get things improved for them, tho. All the best.

Wow. Who knew. There's always some miserable shark out there, isn't there. Thank you for enlightening us.

I think that's why the drivers are getting away with it. Better a bad driver than no driver at all. But it's so wrong.

What a very kind, thoughtful and sensitive couple you are. You are right – it is, of course, absurd and wrong that these people should be carted around like parcels without any say in where they are taken or for how long and then have to pay for the privilege. The worry is that if they complain, they may end up without being taken anywhere at all.

Is the Community Centre run by the local council? If so perhaps they should be told what is going on here, it is awful that the elderly are not being given a voice and the system is being abused. Could you encourage some of the elderly people to speak up, a bit of People Power may be what's needed.