When my mother started declining, and then died, it took me months to get round all the charities which had her on their databases. She did, when she was able, send to those she approved of, but not others, and never more than she could afford, but I resented the fact that they kept asking. To be fair, they all took her name off very quickly, except for the Salvation Army, which needed several phone calls and appeals returned in their pre-paid envelopes - what a waste of money, but it seems to be the only way to be noticed sometimes.
We usually give anonymously, but recently have responded to 2 DEC appeals online. Not any more, as we have had 2 appeals by post from them. Like a lot of you, we give what we want to whom we want, and resent our donations being wasted on postal appeals or worse, "gifts" to encourage us to give more.