Gransnet forums

AIBU

Getting dressed.

(37 Posts)
Atqui Sun 30-Aug-15 12:34:06

Ok, it's Grumpy old woman again! I'm not seeking advice, as I know what I could do and say. I just want to know if anyone else feels this way. We are both retired, so I usually have breakfast in my PJs . H has shower and gets dressed before brekky. I go up to have a shower and get dressed , after breakfast and for some reason like to do this on my own now. When I was working it was a mad dash so didn't matter. Am I alone in being a bit miffed when almost as soon as I turn on the shower up comes H to fiddle around with e.g. Putting clothes away , or to have a shave.?

Indinana Sun 30-Aug-15 12:41:54

Is it the only opportunity he has these days to see you in the buff? shock. Sorry, don't answer that, couldn't resist grin.
Actually that would get my goat somewhat too. I like to be able to shower, dress etc in private these days and would hate to have my husband getting in the way. I'd probably tell him to 'something' off and wait till I'd finished my toilette. Have you tried telling him gently that you'd like this time to yourself?

janeainsworth Sun 30-Aug-15 12:42:43

Why don't you just lock the bathroom door Atqui?
I must admit to feeling slight annoyance if I am lounging in the bath and MrA comes wandering in to see if I know where he has put a piece of paper he has written a vital piece of information on grin

Atqui Sun 30-Aug-15 12:44:56

Indi Ha ha .... I did wonder if people would think this!!!!

ninathenana Sun 30-Aug-15 14:00:32

I don't know the solution except to gently tell him that you "vont to be alone" smile I prefer to do my ablutions in private too. DH doesn't need to know which bits get plucked and which get shaved grin
DH always shaves at the same time as showering. Don't others DH/SO's ?

Anya Sun 30-Aug-15 14:18:18

Take the shower out of its 'cradle' (or whatever that thingy is called) and turn it on him. Laugh uproariously as if you think it's a great joke.

That should do the trick wink

Marmight Sun 30-Aug-15 14:43:56

Well, after he retired, late DH usually showered and abluted first and then it was my turn and we met over breakfast. I wouldn't mind having him back to annoy me - make the most of it..wink

Luckygirl Sun 30-Aug-15 14:51:44

My OH loves to watch me in the shower - fine by me! smile

glammanana Sun 30-Aug-15 14:58:29

My hubby will shower & dress as soon as he is up and about and would do any shaving etc at the same time he seldom disturbs me if I am in the bathroom or dressing but what he will do is if the phones rings he always knocks on bathroom door to tell me its ringing ?? I know that I can hear it his excuse is that it is always for me,well I don't care who it is if it's important they will ring back.

Luckygirl Sun 30-Aug-15 16:54:27

My OH does that all the time with the phone - even when I am in the toilet - he hands it in through the door!!!

And if I am not ensconsed on loo or in shower, he NEVER answers the phone!! - grr!!

tanith Sun 30-Aug-15 16:57:23

I'm always up and into the shower first, OH will follow me in so I am in the bedroom dressing whilst he's showering.. I don't mind if he comes into the bathroom to chat while I'm showering it doesn't bother me.

rosesarered Sun 30-Aug-15 17:04:16

Wouldn't bother me, I have to say.

Jane10 Sun 30-Aug-15 17:11:18

I don't understand why you haven't just told him straight that you want to be able to shower and dress in peace and quiet. Its not unreasonable!

merlotgran Sun 30-Aug-15 17:41:53

DH doesn't come into the bathroom when I'm in the shower but if things go a bit quiet he's shouts, 'You alright in there?'

I never lock the door (just in case) so it wouldn't bother me if he wandered in but seeing as I'm chasing around after him all day I think he realises I like a bit of quiet and privacy.

Atqui Sun 30-Aug-15 17:46:38

jane10that would seem reasonable, but for reasons I d rather not go into,I can't do that. I just wanted to know if I am being odd feeling this way!

Atqui Sun 30-Aug-15 17:49:16

BTW it has nothing to do with being undressed, in case anyone is wondering if I am some throwback to Victoriana.

MamaCaz Sun 30-Aug-15 17:53:16

My OH is another of those that just doesn't seem to get that I have no desire to take a phone call while in the middle of a shower etc., and if I don't respond straight away he will hammer on the bathroom door as if there's a fire and we need to evacuate the building. Grrr.

I almost always lock the bathroom to prevent unwanted intrusions grin

BlackeyedSusan Sun 30-Aug-15 18:21:25

sympathies.

I try to hide in the front room to the computer to escape the stress of two children with additional needs and mother with extreme anxiety and at that point mum finds about twenty reasons why she needs to wander in and out.

Oh and not odd.You must have a magnetic personality. grin

Atqui Sun 30-Aug-15 19:59:00

Thanks Blackeyedsusan

nanaGill Tue 01-Sep-15 16:38:36

My DH and I used to bath together each morning - best time of the day. Would love to be able to do that again :-(

nanaGill Tue 01-Sep-15 16:39:52

My DH and I used to bath together each morning - best time of the day. Would love to be able to do that again sad

ginny Tue 01-Sep-15 20:43:51

No, not unreasonable at all. I like to have the bathroom to myself too.

At the other end of the day . Why is it that if DH is seemingly engrossed in something on the tv, the minute I think I'll go up and read for a while, he immediately decides it's time for him to go to bed too ?

Atqui Tue 01-Sep-15 21:37:05

Oh yes ginny that too !

Atqui Tue 01-Sep-15 21:47:31

Sorry for your loss*Nanna Gill*. I just don't have that kind of relationship with my husband anymore.

Marelli Tue 01-Sep-15 23:08:10

It must be something they're primed to do - I can be lying soaking in the bath, hear the phone ringing and within seconds he's there. One heavy thud on the door...'It's so-and-so on the phone for you'. I do like my own time and space for bathing and dressing, too.