Kate1949, I don’t know your story, but you say your childhood was horrendous, I am very forgiving I know that. , however children being neglected or abused makes me feel sick and angry. To take a child’s childhood away and replace it with fear, I too would find unforgiveable as well. Animals look after their young it’s instinctive to protect those we give birth to and love. I do so hope you have found happiness and confidence in yourself, despite your awful start in life. I think the best way of dealing with such abusers, is not give them any thought time, hard I know, to rehash makes you relive, despite counsellors wanting to keep talking it all out, it’s like picking scabs. They were in the wrong, big time, shame on them. ?,