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AIBU

Just answer the question😬.

(40 Posts)
Sago Sun 22-Jan-23 15:46:14

My husband cannot answer a b@@@@y question.

Here’s an example;

Which suit are you wearing for the wedding?
“I’m not buying a new suit I’ve got plenty”

Which car are you taking in the morning?
“I’ve got to be there for 8, I need to leave at 7.”

Did you order the logs?
“The decorator won’t be coming until after lunch”

He is not deaf or senile.

CountessFosco Sun 22-Jan-23 15:49:27

Oh how I sympathise...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

TillyTrotter Sun 22-Jan-23 15:51:09

My DH is not deaf either but I have long thought our minds are wired very differently by the way he answers questions.
Very similar to yours Sago.

Oreo Sun 22-Jan-23 15:53:56

Sago😂 you have to admit it’s funny tho.

Kate1949 Sun 22-Jan-23 16:29:58

I sympathise to. If mine says something I don't quite hear and I say 'Sorry I didn't hear you', he just repeats the last word. For instance. Him: 'I might go to B&Q tomorrow.'
Me: 'What did you say?'. Him: 'B&Q'.
confused

Shelflife Sun 22-Jan-23 16:33:13

Glad it's not just my husband sago!! He never answers a question, leaves me feeling he is not acknowledging what I have said - drives me mad 😡

GagaJo Sun 22-Jan-23 16:35:31

My DGS is gearing up for this.
Me: What do you want for breakfast?
Him: Look at my Lego!

Charleygirl5 Sun 22-Jan-23 16:44:41

Thank God I now live on my own as that would drive me crazy.

Germanshepherdsmum Sun 22-Jan-23 16:47:01

In my case I’m told ‘You solicitors never give a straightforward answer’. If there was one, believe me I would.

LRavenscroft Sun 22-Jan-23 16:50:20

In our family it is slightly different. I have a train of thought and expect my husband to be able to interpret it without me having to express it words.

Fleurpepper Sun 22-Jan-23 16:52:17

Applies to politicians too.

And on some threads on GN? ;) !

Norah Sun 22-Jan-23 16:58:50

Germanshepherdsmum

In my case I’m told ‘You solicitors never give a straightforward answer’. If there was one, believe me I would.

My husband asked a silly question this morning, I was slowly pondering. Then he said: "just say yes or no."

I said "yes or no."

He's still pouting. Regardless, he's a sweet man and I adore him.

Mollygo Sun 22-Jan-23 17:02:45

Norah
Yes or no
🤣🤣🤣

FannyCornforth Sun 22-Jan-23 17:07:40

I don’t want to be a Dolly Downer, Fun Sponge etc , but please don’t joke about senility

MerylStreep Sun 22-Jan-23 17:10:04

LRavenscroft

In our family it is slightly different. I have a train of thought and expect my husband to be able to interpret it without me having to express it words.

That’s what I’m accused of all the time 😄

FannyCornforth Sun 22-Jan-23 17:15:07

Me too Meryl
I often ask , ‘have I actually said this; or have I just thought it?’

SpringyChicken Sun 22-Jan-23 17:16:04

He may not be deaf but ...

dragonfly46 Sun 22-Jan-23 17:20:30

Both my son and DH wear invisible headphones!

Sago Sun 22-Jan-23 17:40:36

FannyCornforth

I don’t want to be a Dolly Downer, Fun Sponge etc , but please don’t joke about senility

I wasn’t joking, I was stating a fact.

Sago Sun 22-Jan-23 19:39:51

Well that worked Fanny.

M0nica Sun 22-Jan-23 20:46:23

DH is just the same - and always has been, so it isn't a question of age.

In my case it is DH is over thinking his answer and trying to think what I am really getting at when I say something simple like any of Sago's question

Ask about the suit and his immediate reaction, is: she is asking because she wants to leave enough time for me to realise I need a new suit, but I do not need a new suit.

Ask about the car and his immediate reaction, OH, is she wanting to use car A and then come back and use car B for something specific

Ask about the logs, and he is thinking 'we want the decorator out of the house before we start thinking about log deliveries.

I have said to DH, time and again to just answer the question and stop second guessing me If there is a follow up I will then ask it.

I have started prefixing questions with phrases like 'For information only, what is the time? suffixing with 'now, just answer the question, do not second guess me'

Still, he is worth it.

Carenza123 Mon 23-Jan-23 01:52:35

As I tell my daughter - men are from Mars and women are from Venus! Different trains of thought.

grandtanteJE65 Mon 23-Jan-23 13:25:16

I put a stop to this kind of thing years ago by saying, "That was not what I asked you" then repeating my question, but then of course my kind of answer is an occupational hazard of being a teacher.

Reading all these kinds of threads, I cannot help wondering have you all put up with this kind of thing for years? If so, why are you objecting to it now?

If it is a new thing your husbands have started, then there is every reason to suppose that they need their hearing checked.

I know it is well-nigh impossible to get a man to the doctor, but it is sometimes worth-while to make the effort.

And it could be the onset of some kind of senile demetia that is causing these disconnected answers, which is far more worrying than loss of hearing.

NotSpaghetti Mon 23-Jan-23 14:01:57

I definitely answer sub-questions M0nica - and I do get sub-question responses too!
But we do both talk a lot and understand each others ways. 🙄
I don't see it as a problem to be honest but I suppose is is if you want a quick straightforward answer!

JackyB Mon 23-Jan-23 14:30:08

Mine is the same. "Yes" and "No" are simply not in his vocabulary.

I will ask him a question and he will give me a five minute lecture, repeating all the thought processes that went into my asking the question. At the end he arrives at my original question - which he doesn't answer.