Gransnet forums

Ask a gran

Wedding presents for an established couple?

(41 Posts)
Jayanna9040 Fri 06-Jan-17 21:03:04

They've been together a while, They have a house, they have everything they need for the house and garden. No children, so they work hard but have money for holidays, theatre etc. A lot of the guests are not particularly well off so what they would like is something that people could contribute to as their means allow. It's not me by the way but I said that this is the place for good ideas............

annsixty Fri 06-Jan-17 21:28:55

An invitation to the guests house for a lovely homecooked meal would go down well, friends of ours who married in their 70's asked for this. They enjoyed some lovely evenings out with their friends for about a year and the friends got to enjoy their gift as well.

Jayanna9040 Fri 06-Jan-17 22:47:39

That's a really nice idea. But I could do with a few more!!!

rosesarered Fri 06-Jan-17 22:56:41

A really nice Summerhouse for the garden or an attractive solid wood bench or outdoor dining furniture?

rosesarered Fri 06-Jan-17 22:58:01

A dozen mixed roses for the garden , with celebration names?David Austin do lovely ones.

mumofmadboys Fri 06-Jan-17 22:58:35

What about a charity such as Water Aid or so many twinned toilets??

Cherrytree59 Fri 06-Jan-17 23:06:09

Fresh flowers to arrive every month for a year.

As a joke present for a couple who had everything,
I purchased an acre of the moon.
Think it was via WH Smiths

Humbertbear Sat 07-Jan-17 10:10:59

Why not simply donations to their favourite charity if they really have all they want?

Jayanna9040 Sat 07-Jan-17 10:24:57

Just going off on a completely different tack, I wish someone could tell me of a charity that actually puts the bulk of its money into doing the work it advertises and doesn't exist mainly to pay the salaries of those working in its organisation. I'm so jaundiced in this respect that I wouldn't even suggest donations to anyone.

grannypiper Sat 07-Jan-17 11:15:12

Jayanna9040 other than the Salvation Army there are very few.

clementine Sat 07-Jan-17 11:38:07

Jayanna, you reply above has really resonated with me ! I volunteered with a local charity for over three years, leaving because of the beaurocy and the amount of money I felt was going to everything but what it was supposed to go to. They decided they needed to " rebrand" and the amount of time, effort and money spent on that was scandalous. I never give to the big names charities now, and another thing, give once, and they are always phoning and sending out letters, despite trying to unsubscribe they still come, and some are actually quite forceful, leaving me feeling vey guilty for not subscribing, which of course is the point of them !
As regards a present, anything I thought off has already been suggested.

rosesarered Sat 07-Jan-17 12:08:27

The Salvation Army is wonderful, it's our main charity, and it thanks but does not pester you continually like some charities do.

annsixty Sat 07-Jan-17 12:09:45

I suppose this needs another thread really but as it is out here, is WaterAid on the suspect list?. I donate monthly to them, hoping I am doing some good. My other favourite is Smile Train which I have donated to since my GD was born with a cleft and has had the most marvellous treatment fron the NHS. I can't afford to pay large salaries to others so I hope someone has answers.

shysal Sat 07-Jan-17 12:10:51

The only thing I can think of is good quality photo frame(s) for wedding pictures.

Elrel Sat 07-Jan-17 12:36:21

Roses - I've always highly rated the Salvation Army but this year both I and a neighbour were very irritated by them. Having had a mailing about contributing to Christmas meals etc. we were both surprised to receive the same one a week or so later - after we'd responded to the first mailing.
I hope it was a mistake but odd that we both got two mailings. It will make me hesitate next time they ask. I intended to ask the SA why but didn't.

Elrel Sat 07-Jan-17 12:46:15

I still have faith in WaterAid and SightSavers as well as others including the Red Cross. Hope I'm not proved wrong!
A few years ago I write to several charities I'd previously supported objecting to the high salaries of their CEOs. Of course I got replies explaining that they 'needed to pay to get the best people'. I'd rather they employed competent people who actually believed in their cause enough to work for a more reasonable salary.
And I won't even start on how I feel about charities who employ chuggers ...

OP what about theatre tokens, to be used in the future as the couple choose?

rosesarered Sat 07-Jan-17 12:48:52

Elrel that was unusual then, but perhaps you didn't respond early, and the Christmas post can be slow.It's all done by computer, so if you hadn't sent early enough and they hadn't received a cheque, the computer would have sent out again.Just the way things are done now.

Elrel Sat 07-Jan-17 12:55:39

Maybe so, but our feeling was that asking once should be enough!

mcem Sat 07-Jan-17 13:01:55

I supported Sight Savers for many years but switched that cash to Mary's Meals. After a post on GN (THATBAGS I think) I checked out their audited books and that confirmed that 97% of income goes directly to their school feeding projects. They operate with a small staff and rely heavily on volunteers in the field.
Several years ago a few of us pooled resources and bought a crate of decent wine for the couple who had everything!

mrsmopp Sat 07-Jan-17 17:11:15

Starting a new thread on charities.
Now to answer the OP, we knew a couple getting married and both had been married before, so they already had two toasters etc. they asked for no expensive gifts.
I gave them a lovey framed picture of the beautiful old church they married in and they loved it.

Ankers Sat 07-Jan-17 17:21:41

Department store, or some other stores', gift vouchers?

Jayanna9040 Sat 07-Jan-17 18:38:08

Sorry for sidetracking a bit with this one and thanks for all the suggestions. Theatre tickets met with quite a positive response and the idea of dinner at friends houses. I was chatting with them a few minutes ago and one of them (guess which one) thought that guests might like to buy a roll of insulation for the loft!

annsixty Sat 07-Jan-17 19:12:21

It must have been the male. Ever practical.

grannypiper Sat 07-Jan-17 19:43:29

A lovely plant for the garden ?

annodomini Sat 07-Jan-17 20:00:12

When a cousin who had worked for a relief organisation got married to her long-term partner, they needed and wanted nothing for their home, so I went to the Save the Children Wishlist and, on their behalf, donated some goats which would make money and milk for an African family.