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Renewal of vows

(33 Posts)
Foxglove77 Wed 10-Jul-19 15:23:52

My husband and I have been married 39 years so it will be our 40th next year. We had a church wedding and we were 21 and 18 years old respectively. We've had a good marriage, two lovely children with good jobs and a lovely granddaughter. I suggested to my husband that we renew our vows and have a family party. To my surprise he is totally against it. He said he meant his vows the first time and did not feel the need to do it again! He is also against a party as he said the extended family don't have anything to do with us normally but would turn up for a free party! He has suggested we treat ourselves and go on a cruise instead. I love that idea but have just seen you can renew your vows on board! Or shall I not even mention that?

ginny Wed 10-Jul-19 18:45:59

Small family meal and the cruise.
I too can’t see the point of renewing vows if they haven’t been broken in the first place.

PamelaJ1 Wed 10-Jul-19 18:58:47

Foxglove, I wouldn’t bother renewing our vows. We still love each other, nothing changed then. Don’t feel we need to.
It’s just another ‘thing’ in my opinion. Doesn’t mean much if you are happy and secure already.
Enjoy the cruise.

SirChenjin Wed 10-Jul-19 19:04:53

I can’t see the point of renewing vows either - unless one of you has broken them, in which case that’s a pretty public confession! Do the cruise or just have a family party to celebrate (or better still, both)

Urmstongran Wed 10-Jul-19 19:20:27

Congrats on your upcoming 40th wedding anniversary!
I’m another one who doesn’t see the point of having vows ‘renewed’. It has always seemed a bit twee to me, but that’s just my opinion.

Floradora9 Thu 11-Jul-19 13:38:31

Cannot see the point of having a wedding blessed myself . If you both have stuck it out for 40 years then the next 40 will be fine . We have long passed the 40 years but started young .

stella1949 Thu 11-Jul-19 13:48:25

If you already had a church wedding once, and DH doesn't want to do it again, I'd leave it. I can understand if you eloped or had a registry office wedding , but not if you had a full wedding in the beginning. Just go with his idea - which is wonderful ! Toast each other as you sit on deck and watch the sun go down over the ocean ....sounds beautiful.

eazybee Thu 11-Jul-19 15:57:10

A friend's sister renewed her vows, eight years into her third marriage. Excuse for a party, yes, but there was also a wedding present list: le creuset items only!