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Bereavement

Do you delete numbers off your phone when someone dies?

(85 Posts)
Liz08 Fri 09-Mar-18 11:42:35

It seem that quite a few people still have the phone numbers of family and friends who were no longer alive on their mobiles.

My dearly beloved Dad passed away just over a year ago and I deleted his number a few weeks later, now I feel bad.

I did keep the string of texts sent to my sister as I sat by his hospital bed in the weeks before he died. They remind me of the unfolding story.

Bridgeit Fri 09-Mar-18 11:50:56

After a short while I transfer their details to a note book, which I keep especially for dear friends who have died. & also those who I may have lost continued contact with. I find this a comfort & doesn’t feel as harsh & final as deleting them altogether.

Jalima1108 Fri 09-Mar-18 11:51:40

DH went through my address book and tippexed out anyone who had died and I was rather cross because, when we were trying to find out the old address of an elderly aunt it had been neatly erased.
It's as if they never existed

Bridgeit Fri 09-Mar-18 11:53:07

Also you could take a photography of the texts , so they are saved for you to read / look at in the future, without seeing on your phone on a regular basis .best wishes

Jalima1108 Fri 09-Mar-18 11:54:21

Can you write down the number in an address book?

MissAdventure Fri 09-Mar-18 11:54:56

I hate the bloody adverts that come up as soon as you click on a thread!
I now have one about raising funds for breast cancer, which is what my daughter died from.
I haven't deleted her texts, or whatsapp messages, or her number. I don't know what i'll do, to be honest.

Bridgeit Fri 09-Mar-18 12:08:38

Perhaps a memory box with copies, photos & transcriptions would be comforting to you MissAdventure & also a practical way of dealing with them instead of keeping them on your phone. I would just like to add kind thoughts & condolences for your situation.

MissAdventure Fri 09-Mar-18 12:11:52

I wouldn't even know how to start going about that..
I couldn't bring myself to do it yet. I just have to avert my eyes when using whatsapp, for now.
Thank you for you kind thoughts bridgeit

Anniebach Fri 09-Mar-18 12:15:22

I have three old mobile phones and the one I use now plus two that belonged to my daughter, I will not /cannot delete anything on them , feel I am wiping her from my life , yes she is dead but will always be the most special person in my life.

Nanabilly Fri 09-Mar-18 12:20:24

I could not do it .
I still have details of a cousin and a best friend in my phone who are no longer alive but I will not get rid of them from my phone .I would feel as if I was turning my back on their very existence .

hildajenniJ Fri 09-Mar-18 12:25:19

I've deleted the phone number of my Dad, but I have loads of photos and mementos of my parents and grandparents. In my Christmas card address book, I have neatly scored through the names and addresses of deceased friends and relatives, but you can still read them. I believe that my cousin still uses a recording of my mother's laughter as his mobile phone ringtone.

TerriBull Fri 09-Mar-18 12:58:26

I've kept both my mum's mobile and home numbers in my phone, Quite pointless she died in 2008, but just want to hang on to them, I'd love to be able to ring her and hear her voice again sad

Jalima1108 Fri 09-Mar-18 13:49:11

Can you put an adblocker on MissA?
I've done that, if I can remember (or find out) how I did it I'll let you know.
It could hamper other things you may want to look at as some other sites ask you to disable it before you can look (Radio Times is one) but it is worth it.

Jalima1108 Fri 09-Mar-18 13:51:16

I can't remember if this is the one I used but it should work if you have Chrome
chrome.google.com/webstore/detail/ad-blocker/kacljcbejojnapnmiifgckbafkojcncf

MissAdventure Fri 09-Mar-18 13:52:52

Yes, I probably could put one on. I'll have to find out, but my phone memory is almost full, so not sure i'll have room.
It just gives me a pang sometimes, when something pops up unexpectedly.

callgirl1 Fri 09-Mar-18 16:26:03

My husband died 17 months ago, but his number is still in my mobile, which I only use in dire necessity, I hate it.

OldMeg Fri 09-Mar-18 16:31:48

I’ve deleted a couple but there are others I simply cannot bring myself to take off. Silly I know.

LadyGracie Fri 09-Mar-18 16:37:26

My dad died nearly 5 years ago, I still have his mobile number on my phone, along with pictures and messages.

mcem Fri 09-Mar-18 16:57:16

Exactly a year ago I was exchanging texts with my best friend as we planned a trip to Amsterdam. She became ill on Easter Sunday and we cancelled our trip. She died on 1 August and I can't bring myself to delete her.

kittylester Fri 09-Mar-18 17:18:47

I don't delete - ridiculously that seems to imply the people never were.

FlorenceN Fri 09-Mar-18 17:30:58

I'm the odd one out here. I deleted a relative off my phone because it was upsetting to see his name/number.

MamaCaz Fri 09-Mar-18 18:35:59

I was on the point of deleting my dad's contact numbers from my phone a couple of months after he died, but then changed my mind. Six months on, I still don't feel ready to do that.

Inadvertently, I gave a few relatives a shock when I used Dad's email account to send them copies of his life story. They must have thought, albeit briefly, that he was contacting them from beyond the grave blush

grannyactivist Fri 09-Mar-18 19:16:09

Yes, I delete. The reminders are just too poignant.......and in the recent past there have been too many. In the case of a very recently deceased friend I deleted her number and put in her husband's - whose number I had never needed before as all our contacts were through my friend. sad

Willow500 Fri 09-Mar-18 19:26:44

My parents didn't have mobile phones but I can't delete their birthdays or anyone else who has died from my online diary so the dates pop up several days beforehand.

TwiceAsNice Fri 09-Mar-18 23:53:16

I have the number of two friends who have died on my phone. I especially could not bear to delete the most recent one and I am still in regular contact with her husband, I had been friends with them both for many years. The first friend was single