It is important to try and not remain static for too long, sitting in a chair grieving can bring you down. Being widowed is a sharp bend in the road through life and somehow we need to get around that corner.
I think that other women in a couple do often run scared, as though we widows will set out to snare their husbands. Nothing could be further from the truth. I have seen it with my very eyes but I don`t need their husband to hang a mirror or put a shelf up or maintain my bike. I have utterly no interest in other men. In fact I had to shut down a colleague of my husband whose wife, my friend, died
Part of being able to get around that corner in the road is to learn some new skills, not to be afraid of trying. Not to be afraid of dealing with other people such as negotiating with builders, finding a gardener and so on. Learn how to handle a good drill, use and research wall plugs and how to fix holes
I am glad that I moved too, I waited 3 years and then decided to be closer to buses and shops but really I also wanted to develop my own home, in my own style. To blossom again as me.
It can be very difficult to accept being alone and to get out and about, there is sub-fear now about driving unknown routes, about walking in strange unknown places. I too say hello to everyone that I pass on my little walk to the shops and many a time, that person will stop and start a little conversation.
It is not just about grieving a husband but it is about grieving a togetherness that has gone forever. Becoming solo after together is not nice, nor easy but we can adapt if we try