Empty Nest? Enjoy! by Anne Mackle

I have turned the whole empty nest syndrome upside down as I didnt give the DD chance to come home again I moved in with her

Well, many of our cupboards still house my DD's stuff. Both 'children' call in frequently as they live fairly close by and seemed surprised when we're not in or are just on our way out. Both 'children' and now grandchildren have taken to raiding the fridge on entry. I never did this with my parents because they lived so far away from the London area where I moved to on leaving home. If I'm not busy I like it; if I am busy it's a pain, but it's nice they still have a feel for their own home.

I've actually just saw these replies. My children have keys to my house but I don't have keys to theirs. I have to let them know if I'm visiting but they pop in anytime. As you say if you're not doing anything it's fine and I do love they think of this as home but I wish they'd take all their junk away with them.

Exactly!!

After I retired, and they had partners and their own homes, I moved to a smaller house, largely to be mortgage-free. The downside is that when I would like them to come and stay, there's not a lot of room for two parents and two growing children. It doesn't happen very often as they live 'down south' and I don't. They work very hard during the week and it's more appropriate for me to do the travelling to stay with them and I'm always made very welcome.

I've got everyones junk, including the ex husbands and his 'deceased' fathers. What annoys me though is that my kids laugh at my house and it's untidyness, but it's full of their stuff as well. I really am going to tell everyone to clear their stuff out, soon. Mind you, my son's house is quite small and, now that his girlfriend has moved in he does need to have space here to store things.

We have moved from where our children were brought up but they still call wherever we live 'home'. They have keys and we have keys to their homes too. Yes, we still have some of their stuff but not much.

They like to come 'home' for Christmas and Easter when they can and we stay with them a lot too so we don't really miss them and there is always skype.

We recently went to stay with our 'Dutch' son and he talked about us as 'the children' coming to stay! He has even given us pocket money! I can see the time rapidly coming when they are the 'adults'!

My garage has three motorbikes belonging to my son and my driveway has a jeep that he may or may not be keeping. When I left my mums to be married I took everything, not that I had that much,I think the problem is our children have far too much stuff and I think that probably is em our fault. They'll get paid back when their children do the same to them and I hope I'm around to encourage them.

When I moved, there were a lot of mysterious bits of bikes in my garage. DS1 came up to help and we hired a skip - then another skip. Most of the junk was theirs and, in twelve years, they never seem to have missed it.

I wish my nest was empty of 'stuff' too, my girls are long gone and all their stuff went with them but my son is another matter , he went to live/work abroad 2yrs ago and not only did I store 'stuff' he left behind I also had his then girlfriends 'stuff', they broke up and she came and took hers. He is now buying a place abroad so not much chance he's coming back 'home', but how do I get his 'stuff' to where he is? It includes his weight bench with all the weights and a surf board.. maybe OH and I could take up both hobbies when OH retires in 2yrs time.. Most of its in the loft but if we decide to move then its going to the tip however 'precious' it is..

tanith I recommend Freecycle.

Annobel I think the weights 'stuff' could go on Freecycle as you say , I think he has visions of taking his surfboard with him on one of his many trips home as he now lives in a perfect environment for it, but there always seems to be some excuse why it can't go 'this time'. He also has all his Uni stuff, school books and things that his Dad left him when he died , none of which I can really just take to the tip. We need to have a serious talk when he comes in July for a family wedding..

We got rid of two rusting old bikes from our garage only to be asked to get them out as the step-grandson needed a project!

When my husband had a practice we used to store stuff there in unused rooms but after he 'retired' we have had to absorb the 'stuff' at home and the children don't seem to have noticed that 'stuff' now has to be stored somewhere else! [cross]

As we have decluttered ready to move, I have filled bags each time and taken them when we've visited the DC. They have been amazed at what we produced, and they are all over 40!

I think I have finally got rid of all kids stuff. I issued an ultimatum. Remove or bin or I will bin! It worked

That was the benefit of moving house! I managed to get rid of all their stuff in the loft! Just kept lego, a few favourite board games & cuddlies plus the dolls house which are all in regular use now by DGC!

That's maybe what I need to do, move to a smaller house and tell them I don't have room for their junk anymore.