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Too much testosterone!

(15 Posts)
Luckygirl Mon 03-Oct-16 22:07:54

At the last school governors' meeting I found myself surrounded by a testosterone fest - there were some issues that required very delicate handling and the men on the board were sounding off and getting irritated by a situation that needed diplomatic handling. My suggestion that we should approach it all with some detachment and tread with thought did not go down well!

It just set me wondering again about the state of the world under the traditional leadership of men and the messes it leads us in to - sigh.

Cherrytree59 Tue 04-Oct-16 10:12:53

Luckygirl I totally understand where you are coming from.
From a female point of view its do what's needed.
Step back ,watch,
If it looks positive then proceed
or if needed try something different or tweek what's in place
Sometimes its worth letting the people involved think its actually their own idea in the first instance
We( females) can give an invisible gentle hand on the shoulder or pat on the back.
Our counter parts want to 'Get in there' and 'Get it sorted' then 'Pull out as Job Done'
Even if that leaves behind turmoil and uncertainty.
But that then becomes somebody else's problem.
And no blame to be attributed!

M0nica Tue 04-Oct-16 12:19:26

I think the idea that women can manage things better is an illusion.

I worked mainly in male dominated industries like construction and engineering. One (major) company instigated a women's network after being taken through the courts on a serious sex discrimination case.

The networks were run at arms length from the company. Run by members, but using work facilities. The organisation of them was a shambles and lived up to all the stereotypes of women running things; lots of talking but unable to reach decisions, with members going off in huffs and forming cliques.

Give me a mixed sex committee any day, by far the best way to run things.

Luckygirl Tue 04-Oct-16 13:07:53

Yes - I'm all for a mixed sex committee, but not an aggressive approach to delicate problems that need careful handling.

M0nica Tue 04-Oct-16 14:07:55

I think the assumption that male + aggression, in every context is wrong. I have found men are just as capable of dealing with delicate problems as women, or able to recognise when someone else's approach, more oblique than their natural style would be more effective.

I am working with a fellow committee member (male) at the moment, on a very delicate project (dealing with some very touchy male and female egos) and we are working very closely together to assess at each decision point which of us should handle the next potential flashpoint and how.

Luckygirl Tue 04-Oct-16 17:54:07

The men on the committee last night were definitely not capable of dealing with a delicate situation - fanning the flames and breast-beating was the order of the day!

TriciaF Tue 04-Oct-16 21:02:38

Luckygirl - I've felt like that since I was a little girl. Growing up during WW2 I remember thinking why is always the men who are fighting?
I once organised a mass fight, girls v boys, from my class . The girls won!
But did make us as bad as them?

Ana Tue 04-Oct-16 21:08:07

And did the girls only win because the boys (even subconsciously) held back because they'd been taught that they shouldn't hit girls?

We're all products of our upbringing to a greater or lesser extent.

TriciaF Tue 04-Oct-16 21:11:10

Could be, Ana smile

rosesarered Tue 04-Oct-16 21:12:12

This all depends on what men and women make up the committee.There are dithering men and efficient women and vice versa.All committees are a minefield I have found.

Wobblybits Tue 04-Oct-16 21:29:38

Many years ago i was responsible for setting up value engineering groups. These had to be made up from a wide cross section of the companies employees, men, women, old, young, skilled, experienced, experts, operatives etc etc. No suggestions could be ignored,however apparently ill considered. The resulting groups were extremely productive.

Robert48 Tue 23-Feb-21 18:56:30

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Georgesgran Tue 23-Feb-21 19:08:27

Reported

Jaxjacky Tue 23-Feb-21 19:17:25

I think a lot depends on a strong, unbiased chair, it’s a rare talent I’ve found.

GrannySomerset Tue 23-Feb-21 19:33:38

That’s why in my twenty years as a school governor I spent most of it as chair, in order to manage debate, ensure that everyone was heard, and keep a lid on the behaviour Luckygirl describes. Much more effective outcomes, too.