Nursery or not ?

I am dreadfully worried about the lack of socialising in the very early years, we risk a generation of terrified children who see every other adult or child as a possible threat, the early years are such such vital months. I'm with the DiL, let him go back and achieve a semblance of normality in these awkward times. He is not at risk of serious illness, but catching all the coughs and colds going round and getting those out of the way is probably a good idea. If you are clinically vulnerable yourself, then best to keep clear of him anyway.

I’m not clinically vulnerable but live 2 hours away anyway ! Am in a bubble with them but not visiting at the moment.
Thanks for your thoughts.

I really am not sure how much not going to nursery will affect children. In the past, parents who send their children to nursery have been criticised and there are those who claim that pre-school children are best with their parents.

I honestly don't know which is best or whether young children suffer that much. What bothers me is that people have become interested in all sorts of issues (eg. young children's welfare, mental health, human rights) about which they weren't previously that bothered. Maybe I'm being cynical, but I can't help thinking that people champion some causes because they support their beliefs about how the pandemic should be handled.

Having worked from May to July as a supply teacher in a school nursery I would say yes let him go back.

2 of my GC have gone back to Nursery 3 days and as B9Exchange says I think the benefits out way the risk for him.

The staff will have had personal risk assessments completed by the head and clear guidelines for different scenarios.

I don't think a three year old needs to go to nursery. After all, we didn't have them, just started school at five.

Under current circumstances, the safest way to live is to limit our contact and interactions with others.

Surely, two adults, working from home, can manage to look after a small child as well? Many people are managing far more.

Hmm. A tad judgmental maybe ?

We have one of our daughters and her three children living with us, during lockdown we juggle work, homeschooling and entertaining a two year old, who frankly during the last lockdown was left to her own devices rather too often.
So we were delighted to hear her nursery was staying open, two days in, they have three positive tests, one in her bubble, so they have closed, and we wait and hope that she hasn’t caught it.

My daughter has a 3 year old working from home with her at home is pretty impossible
She has been at nursery since she was 6 months and being at nursery they are used to having attention all the time She is very forward for her age
I take over when she is not at nursery and she keeps me busy.
It also depends what work you do my daughters job is full on with loads of zoom meetings during the day. When my granddaughter was at home during the first lockdown my daughter was catching up with the admin side from 9 in the evening to 2 in the morning
If nursery closes I will take over full time

Lucca

Hmm. A tad judgmental maybe ?

More than just a tad, I would have said!

No right or wrong, just what seems best for the child at this moment. Your DiL will know the details and knock-on effects.
One family we are close to have 1 parent working full-time but predictable hours and 1 part-time whose work can be done at any time of the day or night. They can manage childcare between them and still have at least one 'family day' at the weekend.
Another has 1 full time at home, and a part-time key worker who has arranged to do night shifts.
Both of these families can work, and give good quality attention to a toddler.
Yet another has 2 parents in very demanding jobs - 1 in public service, the other a company that demands its pound of flesh. When they were trying to look after a toddler, I felt he suffered - they did the best they could, which meant either working or caring from 5.30am to 11pm 6 days a week. no-one came out of that well.
I would say that you think she (and, I presume, your son) are best placed to make the decision and you back them.

I wouldn't send mine in this situation but obviously we are all different.

Hetty58

I don't think a three year old needs to go to nursery. After all, we didn't have them, just started school at five.

Under current circumstances, the safest way to live is to limit our contact and interactions with others.

Surely, two adults, working from home, can manage to look after a small child as well? Many people are managing far more.

I don't think that's true Hetty. My daughter and her husband are both working from home. He is trying to get new contracts and is on the phone etc and she has regular zoom meetings with head office . 2 toddlers running round and needing fed or supervised has forced them to employ a helper. If Boris does away with the support bubble one of them will have to stop work.

Our little one can go back after ten days, but frankly I think they will probably be closed down.

I think unless you’re living it, you have absolutely no idea how hard it is.

I would send him.

kircubbin2000, now I'm wondering how on Earth I managed to drag up four kids, nurse a sick husband, study and work - all at the same time - I must have been Superwoman!

MamaCaz

Lucca

Hmm. A tad judgmental maybe ?

More than just a tad, I would have said!

Thank you !

Hetty58

kircubbin2000, now I'm wondering how on Earth I managed to drag up four kids, nurse a sick husband, study and work - all at the same time - I must have been Superwoman!

Well clearly you are. Congratulations.

One of my GrtGDs has been at nursery as Mum is working from home but she’s twice been sent home to isolate because someone tested positive. It’s almost impossible to do Mums days work while trying to keep little one occupied. I’m sure she’s not the only one struggling.

Tanith
Completely agree, I guess it’s possible to do your work, supervise homeschooling (in our case one very reluctant) entertain a toddler, plus all the other stuff that needs doing.
But nothing is done properly, and at the end of the day, everyone is fraught, little has been achieved and the house is a tip!

Sara1954, I do recognise the 'used to having attention all the time' thing with my grandchildren - and I disapprove, too

When they stay, in normal times, there's a shocked reaction to:

'I'll be with you in ten minutes'

Then 'I'm bored, what do I do while I'm waiting?'

(ask a silly question...) 'Run around the garden fifty times!'

Having constant attention and direction from an adult limits them, of course, almost as much as neglect. Their creativity and self reliance suffer accordingly.

Three of my kids are managing working from home plus children (two have two and the other has three).

Luckily, they all have WFH partners to help out, take turns - or take over. It was easier in the summer, of course.

Both my daughters are key workers and could use nurseries, but prefer not to. Right now, the risks of transmission and uncertainties of possible closure and/or quarantine are too great.

Hetty58

kircubbin2000, now I'm wondering how on Earth I managed to drag up four kids, nurse a sick husband, study and work - all at the same time - I must have been Superwoman!

Oh, for heaven's sake, you clearly did not literally manage to do all of those things at the same time. That would have been physically impossible, and to claim otherwise is clearly ridiculous

I presume that what you really mean is that you were able to juggle your responsibilities. Well good for you, but no one else has the job you had (one that clearly could be abandoned at a moment's notice), or any other identical circumstances, so any supposed comparison is meaningless.

Hetty, I don’t disagree in principle, but trust me, in practice it’s exhausting, maybe if they were my children I’d run a much tighter ship, but they’re my grandchildren and that makes it a bit harder.