Gransnet forums

Chat

Ukrainian refugee and host running off together

(118 Posts)
Secretsquirrel1 Sat 21-May-22 17:57:07

Did anyone see in the DM today about the British couple who took in beautiful 22 year old refugee from Ukraine and shortly after then the man dumped his partner of 10 years and ran off with her. Apparently ‘they had a connection from the start’.
I feel so sorry for the mans partner of ten years. What a betrayal. Talk about no good deed goes unpunished ! Men are faithless creatures.
I wouldn’t be surprised if this young lady doesn’t get fed up and dump him before too long. I just hope his previous partner doesn’t take him back if he comes crawling home.

GrannyGravy13 Sat 21-May-22 18:01:42

.

rafichagran Sat 21-May-22 18:08:07

Not all men, she is as bad, she is old enough to know right from wrong.
You cannot judge all men badly because of this. I dont know the details, maybe the marriage had problems before, maybe there was a connection, or maybe he is just a cheating fool. Whatever the reason it is hurtful for his wife. No I would not take him back if it goes wrong with this young woman.

rafichagran Sat 21-May-22 18:09:13

Sorry it should read partner.

Squiffy Sat 21-May-22 18:17:52

I wonder if, sadly, this may lead to the potential loss of people willing to take in anyone needing a home. It may cause them to rethink. ?

Kate1949 Sat 21-May-22 18:25:52

I feel desperately sorry for them but I would never take anyone into my home that I didn't know. I admire those who do.

BlueSky Sat 21-May-22 18:30:52

Especially beautiful young women Kate! wink

Kate1949 Sat 21-May-22 18:34:45

No anyone really BlueSky. I would maybe take children. I am very wary. I know it sounds unkind but I wouldn't feel comfortable at all.

BlueSky Sat 21-May-22 18:35:53

Agree with you on this Kate.

JenniferEccles Sat 21-May-22 18:51:54

They think they are ‘in love’ after two weeks! What could possibly go wrong? !
I guess there always was a risk of this happening. A variation of the husband running off with the young au-pair!

ixion Sat 21-May-22 19:00:54

I remember the late, much lamented Katherine Whitehorn advising never to select a plain au-pair, in the belief that one's husband would not be led astray.
Choose, she advised, the most gorgeous one you could, safe in the knowledge that she wouldn't give your OH a second look!

Blossoming Sat 21-May-22 19:49:00

Blimey, it’s like the plot of a novel!

Millie22 Sat 21-May-22 20:44:28

Poor wife and children.

I bet the relationship with the woman won't last long. What a way to return a kindness.

Secretsquirrel1 Sat 21-May-22 22:58:04

I also noticed that the man in question, said this girl who just happened to be a 22 year old beauty) was the first person from Ukraine who he made contact with.
Yes I bet she was! He probably wasn’t so keen to reach out to the 65 year old refugee granny wanting room and board !

BlueSky Sat 21-May-22 23:09:31

Au pairs! Now that’s asking for trouble!

FannyCornforth Sun 22-May-22 07:21:58

I love that Katherine Whitehorn story ixion smile

Stanley Johnson required his children’s French nannies to work naked.
He told them that it was so save on the washing.
(From Tom Bowers’ biography of Boris Johnson)

mumofmadboys Sun 22-May-22 07:22:57

The press love it when these stories come out. No mention of situations working out well with hosting refugees.

FannyCornforth Sun 22-May-22 07:25:30

I agree with you too Kate
I could only do it if I had a very large house, and we could live very independently.

Re the op: I wonder whose idea it was to house Ms Karkadym? hmm

Allsorts Sun 22-May-22 07:34:10

What a betrayal of trust both sides. Sounds like instant lust not love, hope the partner gets to keep the house until she doesn't need it.
I agree with Kate also.

Joseanne Sun 22-May-22 07:50:25

Who sold the story to the paper, the wife or the husband? I haven't read it yet.

FannyCornforth Sun 22-May-22 08:34:30

By the look of it Joseanne, I’m pretty sure that it was him.
He looks very pleased with himself.
Twisting the knife.
I’ve just look at The Sun ‘exclusive’ and it was him.
It doesn’t bode well, does it.
Nasty sod

Joseanne Sun 22-May-22 08:48:07

So he is proud of what he did then? Horrible.

I have a story to sell the papers ... yesterday I chatted with 2 Ukranian families and their host family. The latter had been due to go on holiday this month but the refugees arrived earlier than expected in April, so they cancelled their trip. A selfless and generous decision. The teenage children have all been given places at a prestigious independent school, along with free music lessons and additional extras. The two mothers have secured part time cleaning jobs.
But of course the papers don't want the feel good stories with positive outcomes.

Galaxy Sun 22-May-22 08:58:14

Sorry but I think he is particularly unpleasant. This is a relatively young woman, we have no idea of what atrocities she has seen or trauma she has been through. Alone in a strange country not knowing when she will return home or what is happening there. Its possible she seduced him but the more likely scenario is she was very vulnerable to that approach.
I know a women from Ukraine, she has lived in England for 20 years so not a refugee. She looks permanently traumatised every time I see her.

Kandinsky Sun 22-May-22 09:12:30

This sums up why so many ‘ordinary people’. signed up to take in Ukrainian refugees.
Ukrainians are, on the whole, nice looking. They look like us. ( or better in many cases )
The whole, ordinary people opening up their homes to Ukrainians, has made me a bit sceptical from the start.
Would these people take in Somalians or Afghan refugees - very much doubt it.

Baggs Sun 22-May-22 09:24:31

Humans being humans, it was bound to happen. Shrug. I do feel sorry for the wife.

But as others have pointed out, all the successful refugee placements that haven't caused any trouble will outnumber the 'blips' by several orders of magnitude. I think it's worth bearing that in mind.