Last year I posted that I found out one of my sons is an alcoholic. He had become increasingly estranged from the family over the years and it wasn't until he had had a couple of periods of hospitalisation that we found out the cause. He also asked us for help. We brought him home to live with us and frantically sought treatment for him. There was no help and, in desperation, we cashed in retirement savings and paid for private residential treatment. The rehab clinic certainly provided my son with some coping tools. Even after rehab though, there was another lapse.
We have seen the battle with addiction at first hand and nothing can prepare you for seeing your adult child suffer so much. We have also had to keep his secret (his request), it has isolated my OH and me from all but the very closest of family. We don't know if my son can be sober for the rest of his life but he has not had any alcohol for 18 months. But he is so ashamed of his addiction that I dare not even tell him how proud I am that he has got this far.
I feel I'm tempting fate by even posting this. I don't want to say we are hopeful, perhaps that we feel less hopeless. Like others in this thread, my heart goes out to those who are parents/grandparents of those who are struggling with all kinds of substance abuse. We've seen GN threads where addicted partners get no sympathy, but when it is your child who is the addict, however old they may be, we keep loving them, no matter what the cost to ourselves.