Starblaze -- The moment when my husband and I realized we had the 'same mom', I asked him, "Did she sound anything like 'this'?" and then I did a version of my Ma. How to win a man in one easy step -- prove you have to act like that "on purpose" and that's not your 'normal'.
What's interesting is, when I actually tried to behave that way? It was exhausting even as a joke. It takes a lot of energy to be that constantly negative, nit-picky and judgmental. Especially when all I could see was the beautiful things in him that his mother tried to destroy. Goat love is good love.
So yeah, I have found a profound drop in my D&A as I grew emotionally healthier over-all. And the humour? Yes, my humour may be dark at times, but the rest of me is more like moonlight. I'm not a bright light that leads to a point. I am a gentle glow that tries to illuminate.
Or I could be a thunderstorm that is tossing out lightning... Bitter, angry, biased, immature, attention seeking, a 'gas-lighter', making up 'buzz-words' etc.
Perception is reality. When you can accept someone else's perception is their reality as viewed through the dirty kitchen window, You (as a healthier thinker) can happily keep hanging what you know are clean clothes on your line... Regardless of how dirty the neighbour 'thinks'/perceives your linens are. I sometimes forget that last one, which is when I can fall back a little.