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Estrangement

First Grandson born in Australia

(16 Posts)
BlueSpinnaker Sat 29-May-21 09:04:31

Hi - I am new here and I don’t know how this really works - the whole grandparent idea. My son moved to Australia a few years ago, has married, and as I type his wife is in labour with our first grandchild - a little boy. It looks like we won’t be able to see him for another year. My husband seems to cope with it somehow, and his life potters on, but I don’t know how to process this. I feel unable to physically move this morning. Not sure what I am asking really, I just need a good cry!
Thanks ?

Juliet27 Sat 29-May-21 09:11:20

There are several us on here with children and grandchildren in Australia wondering when we’ll get the chance to see them again. It's heartbreaking - you’re not alone with the upset. Exciting for you to have a new grandson, even though at a distance.

Esspee Sat 29-May-21 09:12:16

Have a good cry first then count the positives. They are in a country which has handled the pandemic so much better than here and by now your son is possibly a proud daddy.
You will be able to see them regularly thanks to the Internet.
I am 5000 miles from my grandchildren and do have a wobble from time to time. It’s allowed.
Congratulations in advance grandma. ?

nanna8 Sat 29-May-21 09:47:49

Oh congratulations on this new little boy who is coming soon. One of these days you will meet when this nightmare is over. Meanwhile perhaps you could zoom or FaceTime so at least you get to see him. We are in lockdown just now so we can’t even see the local grandchildren,but so much worse for you because they are super strict here as you know. Which state are they in? Things vary a lot between states, they are not all as bad as Victoria.

henetha Sat 29-May-21 10:18:09

Congratulations. Grandsons are wonderful.
I do fervently hope that you will be able to visit him before too long. Meanwhile, thank goodness for modern technology. But holding him in your arms will be wonderful eventually.

EllanVannin Sat 29-May-21 10:18:54

I know only too well what this is like and also remember having work and family commitments here at the time when D had been in and out of hospital because of her high BP ,with me stuck here worrying.
It wasn't as though I could just drop everything and jump on a plane.

Before technology came into its own, D sent me video recordings of my new GS, then 3 months later first GD was born here so it left me betwixt and between.

All won't be lost as once you can get to Oz, have 3 months there to give you time for your GS to recognise who you are then visit as regularly as you can with 3 month stays.
This worked very well for me and now the 3 GC, 30 odd years on, know me.

I had the loveliest pic sent the other week of the whole family, including partners for GD and 1 GS. Now I'm waiting for GGC from them! Don't know when though sad

DillytheGardener Sat 29-May-21 10:36:29

Oh it’s so hard isn’t it? My first grandchild was born in New Zealand during the pandemic and I haven’t met them yet nor am I likely too for another year. DIL has gone back to work and wouldn’t be able to take the time to quarantine on their return and she is also very vulnerable to Covid and hasn’t as of yet been vaccinated.

I try be involved by buying children’s books and toys on amazon in duplicate , I read to gc on Zoom, with both of us having a copy of the book or toy on both sides of the world.

Some times I say granny hugs teddy and I give teddy a hug, and dill will do the same with their identical teddy that I sent with GC watching wide eyed.

It me feel like I’m there. I also recorded some books on tape that ds and dil play when they put gc down for naps so gc is used to my voice.

I can’t wait to meet gc and sometimes I wake up bolt upright at 3am upset I can’t see them all, but day to day I try think up fun things so this time is something we will remember fondly of the books we read and special moments.

Mary59nana Sat 29-May-21 17:24:06

My middle son lives in Perth Oz
Married with a 2year old boy.
Some days I feel lost without being able to touch and hug my son and be a nanna to my GS but they are happy healthy and living a good life in a much better country than this one so I just have to accept this and feel proud of his happy life

sodapop Sat 29-May-21 17:37:05

Congratulations Bluespinnaker a lovely grandson. I think Mary59nana has said it all really. Be happy for them

Hithere Sat 29-May-21 17:58:57

Are you in touch with your son?
If so, you may have placed the thread in the wrong subject.

How about setting up videochats? A year goes by fast.
Times we live in are hard and unusual.
Maybe counseling would help as well?

BlueBelle Sat 29-May-21 18:08:24

Two grandkids born in NZ I first saw the eldest one at 18 months and the second one at 8 months I ve only met them a few times but it is what it is they are all healthy and well and happy The eldest got married a couple of months ago had to make do with photos
I m happy for them, they have a good life

ElaineI Sat 29-May-21 18:55:25

Great news BlueSpinnaker and lots of good advice here. You have posted it on the estrangement thread though which it doesn't sound like it is. That thread is for people who are prevented from contact with family members due to a fall out or similar. It sounds like covid and miles will prevent you from seeing your grandchild which is different. We lost our once in a lifetime holiday to visit family in Perth Australia during first lockdown. It is very hard for people with family in places we cannot yet visit. Please let us know how you DiL gets on x

ElaineI Sat 29-May-21 18:57:03

Grandparenting may be a better thread to post on as you might get more advice x

BlueSpinnaker Wed 02-Jun-21 08:35:48

Thank you for all those lovely words - lots of great ideas and it’s so good to feel I’m not alone.
Yes I think it is in the wrong place - can it be moved? Sorry!

GrandmaRosie Fri 04-Jun-21 20:27:08

BlueSpinnaker

Hi - I am new here and I don’t know how this really works - the whole grandparent idea. My son moved to Australia a few years ago, has married, and as I type his wife is in labour with our first grandchild - a little boy. It looks like we won’t be able to see him for another year. My husband seems to cope with it somehow, and his life potters on, but I don’t know how to process this. I feel unable to physically move this morning. Not sure what I am asking really, I just need a good cry!
Thanks ?

Hi, my grandson, daughter and son-in-law are in Australia- haven’t seen my grandson since he was 17 months old and he’s 3 and a half now? I miss them so much and it’s frustrating that Australia is on our ‘green’ list, but they won’t let us in. Good to know I’m not alone though.

Suzan05 Wed 23-Jun-21 16:38:15

A little late reading this forum but I too have a daughter and her partner living about three hours out of Perth, Australia. They had their first baby last May 2020. We have only seen her on Whatsapp but are lucky that is four/five times a week sometimes more. It was 2018 the last time we saw my daughter and her partner and can't wait to be able to go out to see them. Sadly I think it will be sometime yet as Australia is being very strict which is a good thing for the country. It is so good to hear of other people in our situation.