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Cooking for a picky OH with oesophageal cancer

(11 Posts)
cwm33 Tue 13-Apr-21 18:35:55

Help ! I am right at the beginning of trying to make meals for a very "difficult" man who has just been diagnosed with cancer.

He is not and never has been an easy man but I am at my wits end trying to cook for him and wonder if anyone has any suggestions.

He is also still at the stage of anger/denial .....

B9exchange Tue 13-Apr-21 18:42:43

He's grieving and worried, he is bound to be angry with the world. Contact your nearest hospice and ask them for support. They have people who can talk to him, and also probably a dietician to advise you. I think you can only be guided by him as to what he feels like eating.

Try to look after yourself too, find things that you enjoy doing without him. And cook for yourself things that give you pleasure.

crazyH Tue 13-Apr-21 18:45:09

He has just had a devastating diagnosis. I have no advice regarding meals or relationships, but please give him a bit of leeway for now. I’m sure you are filled with fear and anxiety as well. I feel for both of you ....flowers flowers

suziewoozie Tue 13-Apr-21 18:46:01

I’ve no experience of this but here’s a reliable link - there will be other good sources I’m sure. Look after yourself as well as B9 said

www.cancerresearchuk.org/about-cancer/oesophageal-cancer/living-with/eating

Redhead56 Tue 13-Apr-21 19:07:21

That is a really good link I could have done with that for my MIL. I recommend nutritious soups and stews and yoghurts. Very sorry about your DH and I agree you must look after yourself too ?

M0nica Tue 13-Apr-21 20:12:23

DH has been very seriously ill recently and is still in the early stages of recovery and I would reiterate what everyone else has said about looking after yourself and finding time to do things you like. I make sure I get outside most days, gradening and walking. I am keeping up my Tai Chi online.

There are other simple thingsyou could do: like finding time for long luxurious baths several times a week. Now, even the best restaurants do take aways, a really nice meal once a week, a daily walk, a weekly ambling shop. Find little things you enjoy that can be squeezed into your life and you must squeeze the time to do them.

You and your DH have had an awful diagnosis and both of you need to adjust to it, but looking at the Cancer Research site, it really is very helpful

hulahoop Tue 13-Apr-21 20:20:11

Look at online forums the can offer suggestions take care and make sure you eat well ?

cwm33 Wed 14-Apr-21 09:46:39

Thank you all for your replies . All of you have been so supportive its making me feel better. I think the CV situation is partly to blame as I feel very cut off from any discussion.
I have been in touch with MacMillan , they are so good

Thank you Gransnet XX

mhammedali21 Fri 18-Jun-21 14:50:58

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lovebeigecardigans1955 Fri 18-Jun-21 15:04:04

I'd suggest liquidising things as soups and smoothies are easier to get down, as are ice cream and mousse. When DH was very ill we had a nutritionist visit us and she had much good advice.

Hithere Fri 18-Jun-21 17:01:39

How about shakes? Kate farm is expensive but could be worth it