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Grandparenting

Lessons learnt the hard way

(37 Posts)
schnackie Tue 12-Sep-17 12:21:00

I just really need to have a moan about this and grateful that GN forums have a place for this. Since my grandchildren were born, 5 years ago, in America, I have frequently posted small packages to my daughter with inexpensive items of clothing, toys etc. and all have arrived within a week or two. However 2 months ago, I posted a very special package with a much wanted Paw Patrol toy, other toys and a dress for my granddaughter. I also included a few small personal possessions as I am decluttering. In any event, the package never arrived and I am heartbroken. In future, every single package will be traceable and insured. (I even wondered if it was because I put some British sweeties in the package. I am well aware that Kinder Eggs are ILLEGAL in America - though you can buy your 6 year old a BB gun - but I wonder if the popping candy could have posed a problem.) Definitely a First-World problem, but I just wanted to share my sadness sad.

silverlining48 Tue 12-Sep-17 12:49:51

What a shame, and how annoying. Kinder eggs are forbidden? How strange.
2 months is a long time but you never know, it may turn up intact with those firbidden sweeties. Hope so.

Nanabilly Tue 12-Sep-17 13:19:06

If it had been stopped by customs for any reason would you have been notified by them .?
My mil had sent a parcel containing "forbidden fruits" and she was notified along with choice of a bill or confiscation.

Nannarose Tue 12-Sep-17 14:54:01

How sad. We experienced this when sending to another country whose name I don't want to mention. However, we knew there were problems; we sent inexpensive but otherwise unobtainable items, and we're glad if one or two out of 10 made it through.
I would have expected the US to have had a proper system of notifying.l

CariGransnet (GNHQ) Tue 12-Sep-17 14:57:08

My niece lives in the US and loves coming here to have Kinder Eggs grin. Yep - definitely odd that you can't buy one for safety reasons but you can buy a gun.

Imperfect27 Tue 12-Sep-17 15:14:35

schnackie how disappointing and frustrating for you - especially when other packages had all travelled safely. You clearly put such a lot of love and thought into the parcel and the loss of some personal items must make it feel all the more sad.

Is there any tracking system that would give you a clue as to where / when the package went astray? I know it won't bring it back, but still might feel helpful to know.

Packages are so very expensive to send these days. I get very cross when asked to pay extra to ensure 'next day' delivery - surely that is what first class always used to be about? And I tend to say 'Under £20 and 'nothing of value' even if it has cost up to £30-£35 as I think it wrong to be asked to pay so much!

JUST maybe your parcel will turn up. I hope the mail service can give you some idea of what / where things went wrong too.

SueDonim Tue 12-Sep-17 17:51:36

I sympathise, Schnackie as I too mail parcels to my son in America and have had a less than acceptable service.

My grandson's birthday card never arrived, last year, then a parcel I sent for Christmas, which contained Christmas jumpers for everyone went missing.

They eventually received them at the end of January. They all decided to wear them just for one evening, despite Christmas being well and truly over, but took them off again as quick as they could, because the clothes were stinking of mould and dirt. It isn't cheap to mail abroad, in the first place, and to get this kind of service is appalling. angry

BlueBelle Wed 13-Sep-17 06:26:37

Well a different country but about a month ago I posted a small parcel to my daughter in Ireland they have only just started having post codes so I checked double and treble checked that I d got it right and yes you ve got it it has never arrived the blooming postage cost as much as the small present I m very annoyed I have now filled in a form etc but have not heard anything from the post office .... I sent a birthday card as well without the new post code and that arrived perfectly I had my 'sent from' address on the back but it hasn't come back to me

JackyB Wed 13-Sep-17 07:25:25

Our parcels to GC in the US usually take much longer than a week. And they are utterly hopeless with letters.

JackyB Wed 13-Sep-17 07:28:05

I thought the thing about Kinder eggs was to do with hygiene. You are not allowed non-foods inside food.

gillybob Wed 13-Sep-17 07:40:25

I m not sure how you sent your parcel shnackie but I would never trust sending anything by Royal Mail or Parcel Force that wasn't insured.Not sure if any other carriers are any better but Royal Mail (what a joke) seem to be getting worse. Opened birthday cards, lost parcels, opened parcels with things missing and little help when you complain. I would no longer send anything (other than a very basic letter) with them uninsured.

So sorry to hear that your parcel is "lost" (hmm it's nothing to do with how valuable the contents but the fact that you should be able to trust the postal system.

Maggiemaybe Wed 13-Sep-17 07:44:42

On the other hand, and in the other direction, I have just had a large carpet square delivered from the US. Ordered just before midnight on a Thursday night, arrived at our door at noon on Monday. shock

Maggiemaybe Wed 13-Sep-17 07:48:49

And I can't remember the last time I had a problem with Royal Mail.

quEEEniE Wed 13-Sep-17 09:46:32

Even if you pay extra for a signed delivery with the Post Office there is no gaurantee . I sent some precious photos in the post but Mickey Mouse( students in a shared house) signed and was accepted. The post office compensated me by sending me a book of 6 first class stamps. The postal worker was never asked why the the signature was accepted.

radicalnan Wed 13-Sep-17 09:50:08

I send things via couriers wherever possible now as you can track them the length of the journey for no extra charge. it is infuriating when things get 'lost' in the post, they must be somewhere.

I also hate it when Royal Mail gives me 4 stamps as compensation for something that cost much more, things from my dad which I sent to my daughter broken and ruined, 4 stamps compensation.

kazziecookie Wed 13-Sep-17 09:53:07

My daughters were travelling Australia over the Christmas holiday so I sent them a parcel with some novelties in Santa hats, reindeer antlers, socks and a couple of Thorntons chocolate lollipops of a santa and a snowman. They had melted and the faces were all distorted (they sent me a photo of them) they looked really funny but they said they tasted lovely.

schnackie Wed 13-Sep-17 09:55:58

Thank you all for your kind words and commiserations! I do maintain a tiny degree of hope that it may turn up someday!

foxie Wed 13-Sep-17 10:25:02

Parcels to America containg Kinder Eggs are illegal because their customs experience has shown that the eggs will often contain drugs. Simple

gillybob Wed 13-Sep-17 11:15:09

Wow Maggiemaybe you are very lucky. I send a lot of letters and parcels for work and we have had masses of issues. Lessons learned either not to use them st all where possible or to insure everything .

sarahellenwhitney Wed 13-Sep-17 11:16:48

Schnakie. Were you completely honest in filling out a customs slip that is attached to your parcel ?
Leave no stone unturned and you are able to obtain information concerning U.S parcels , from the PO, such as what foods are allowed to contain and must not contain.
Any parcel shown or not shown containing food can be scanned for drugs.
Apart from taking time to reach my family,the US postal service does not rush itself, no parcels have gone astray in the many years I have sent parcels to my family.
They have contained sweets, and various other U.K goodies.
How ever with the increasing costs of postage I now send money via my bank Not however the same as opening a parcel , they are getting older, but the variety of goods in the U.S is in my opinion second to none but nice to have the option from elsewhere.

maddy629 Wed 13-Sep-17 11:29:24

Kinder eggs are banned? I knew they had some strange ideas in the United States but this takes the biscuit.

CW52 Wed 13-Sep-17 11:32:03

I've been sending parcels to family in Australia for more than 10 years but don't use the Post Office any more, I use the online service Parcel2go or Parcelhero......everything is tracked. I have had issues a couple of times though that have been entirely my own fault.
1. I enclosed a wrapped gift from my sister in law who said it was toiletries, I didn't realise it contained nail varnish! It came back to me?
2. I sent a toy with battery inside (impossible to get at without destroying the doll!) it came back to me! Some couriers do allow one battery but I'd chosen the wrong one.
There are no refunds for things like this, a very expensive lesson learned.....each time it cost £40-£50 ?
I'm very careful now ?

sarahellenwhitney Wed 13-Sep-17 11:32:30

Schnackie. My apologies. I am not suggesting you did not declare all the contents of your U.S parcel but it is so easy to miss, unintentionally and I have been there, an item off the extremely small customs form. blush

Jan1234 Wed 13-Sep-17 11:40:20

When I lived in America, my daughter sent me a package containing, amongst other things, a small box of specialty chocolates - 6 in total. When the package arrived, it was in a plastic sleeve with a note from US Customs, stating that they had been opened by them. Of the six chocolates, three had been cut in half, carefully put back into the box. Guess what I did with them!

ffinnochio Wed 13-Sep-17 11:43:15

Last year I sent Kinder Egg Advent Calendars to my grandchildren in America just for the hell of it. They arrived safely and were thoroughly enjoyed. I filled out the customs label as 'gifts'. Very satisfying bucking the rules!

On the whole though, I transfer cash to my daughter-in-law who buys and wraps on my behalf. She has much more of an idea of what they'd like and it's much more economical.