How should I cope with a daughter's social anxiety

A word with the visiting midwife as they call up to 6 weeks after a baby is born. I'm sure she would help, or get help for your daughter. Professional help is vital and unless your daughter requests it, take a step back for the time being and get yourself settled for when you are needed.

Keep in touch by phone etc, abide by her wishes for now, let her find her feet, be patient.

Aww, bless you, and congratulations on your new granddaughter. Just give her time. Two weeks is nothing for most new mums, let alone one who is already anxious. I understand your need, but really, for the greater good, try to stay in the background, but make sure she knows you’re there for her. Her husband sounds lovely, and on the case. Let them deal with it together. Once she knows she’s not under pressure to see anyone, she’ll most likely be much better. Honestly...you’ve got years of enjoyment to be had with your granddaughter, a few weeks isn’t going to matter.

Maybe she is worried about you working and then wanting ‘just a quick cuddle’ with a very young baby?

COVID is still out there don’t forget, I would be anxious if my Mum wanted to keep cuddling my young baby too. Try staying in the garden for your visit, don’t force her to do something she doesn’t want to do.

I think you need to give her some time and space OP. Two weeks post CS is no time at all, she's still recovering. Let her take things at her own pace and above all, take every opportunity to make her feel like a good Mum.

Please give your DD time for her hormones to settle down. Her home is her safe place and for someone who has any sort of anxiety that is crucial, so unexpected visits may be a trigger for her panic attacks.
Do you have a decent relationship with your SIL? If so maybe drop a wee text asking if there is anything practical you can do to help - like shopping or washing etc.
If you do follow this route, please do not tack on any requests to see their newborn. I know it will feel counterintuitive, you’re a concerned mum and excited Gran, but having a bit of patience now and offering solid, reliable and practical help is what’s needed, not someone applying pressure to access their baby, born in a pandemic to a mum who may be struggling already.
Congratulations on the new arrival, I wish you all the best and hope your daughter is enjoying her new role as a mum - even if it is behind closed doors for a wee while!

I feel for you the worry about your daughter is tainting the excitement of the little arrival but the other posters are right bide you’re time she has a supportive husband and is getting some medical help so try and play it her way for now And don’t rush her as long as she and her husband knows you are there that is all you can do for now
Congratulations on becoming a gran/ Nan ?

Leave her alone. I remember resenting anybody trying to help, particularly my MIL and my own mum! To me they were interfering and I was horrified at their outdated methods. I think to a certain extent is normal, much more so if your daughter is already suffering from anxiety. I’ve always stayed in the background when it was my turn to be a granny as much as I wanted to see my grandchildren.

Thank you all so much for your wise advice. I will certainly be following it, even though it's hard, but I know it's what my daughter wants and her needs are the most important thing. You have all been very helpful and it is much appreciated.

These are very difficult times for anyone with social anxiety. I would stick with her rules at present. She is aflood with maternal hormones and the instinct to protect her new baby on top of her anxiety. Tread gently.

Are you sure it's not the baby blues or postnatal depression. I know I had it after the birth of my first child. Have a read of this ...... www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/feeling-depressed-after-birth/

Her home is her safe place and keeping the curtains and blinds closed makes it even safer. What does her husband say? Will she leave the house with him? Will she go into the back garden? My first success was to do that. It was very private with 6ft walls so that I was totally enclosed but it was outside and it extended my safe space. Keep in touch by text. She may not answer but she knows you're thinking about her and that means so much. She needs professional help even if it's just meds because she won't come out of this on her own. She'll also need a huge amount of support and understanding from her husband and family.