The content of the dream usually doesn't matter it is how the dreamer feels which is upsetting.
My son dreamed of a fox running across the garden but he knew it was going to be killed (he did not see this happening) but it was that which scared him.
However, I offer here what may help you as it did with my elder son.
You can do this alone or with a partner (obviously my son and I did it together). You relax, start describing the dream and then at the crucial moment your partner (if you are working with one) says, 'OK, stop a moment' and gives you an alternative scenario or suggestion.
You talk about this in some detail, making sure you have grasped the fact that you are going to be in charge next time you dream.
I know it sounds odd and it may not work immediately but after several sessions it can give you the power to change how you feel in the dream.
In our case I then said, 'This is a clever little fox and he knows all the countryside so he is never going to get caught.'
We talked a lot about how foxes are smart, with a good sense of smell and see better in the dark than humans.
The next time we did the imagining (before he had the dream again), the people who were looking for the fox got lost. They were very stupid people, couldn't find their feet in a fog. so gave up and went home, having got very wet and cold.
Next time, we put the fox's favourite food out and had a party - later still we imagined he had found a lady fox and had cubs.
All this took several very talkative sessions of course.
But little by little I gave my son the ability to feel differently, more powerful in his dream which he had 2 or 3 times more but was no longer freaked out by it.
Clearly you and your DH will have to tailor your 'weapons' to your own story.
This was nearly 50 years ago but I think the technique may still work.