What's in Boris's file?

His shopping list? 'On your way home, dear, would you please get . . . . . ?'

A mirror so he can check his hair.

A small laptop so he can catch up with Twitter in dull moments.

Instructions from his boss? Dominic Cummings?

I caught a glimpse and it was a print-out of this thread on Gransnet:
www.gransnet.com/forums/house_and_home/1263155-Dried-blood-on-carpet
There is a helpful post on that thread on how to get red wine stains out of a cream carpet

Viagra.

Its part of the regulation get up all Council workers etc carry a file when they are out and about makes them look important.

His briefs---koff.

A replica (to scale) of the UK's position in the world after Brexit.

Spot on glamma - it's to make him look prime ministerial; or it could be a one-sheet flyer of his plans for Brexit.

Brilliant ideas! Thanks

Fag packets - where he wrote his Brexit plans....

That's where Theresa went wrong - she never carried a folder.

Its probably a draft of his autobiography, another piece of fiction like most of his journalism.

I've just realised it's a list of his women and children so he doesn't get confused about them again.

Whatever people think about BJ I love his enthusiasm, his humour and optimism. Whether he can deliver is another thing. JC has such a depressing demeanour.

Now as to his case under his arm I suspect it is clean underwear in case he gets lucky ?

I agree completely Kate. It will all end in tears but he makes a change from all the people putting the UK down.

I think the file contains balloons and party poppers!

One person’s optimism, enthusiasm and humour is another’s BS. The man stands to make a lot of money from Brexit - no wonder he’s laughing at us all.

A colouring book of Europe?

? Kitty.