What would you do?

Tell your OH his brother sexually harasses women and is an alcoholic.

If he is not irate with his brother and tells him off, run

I have a feeling your OH is very well aware how is brother is,

Why would you not tell your OH? I would not keep that from him.

I’d cross my bridges when I came to them.

Presumably you made it perfectly clear that the behaviour was unwanted & inappropriate, and that might have been sufficient to deter him in the future.

If your husband is unaware of his brother’s proclivities and you don’t tell him, you’ll be the bad guy if you simply make excuses to not see them.

I would have put the brother in his place and not ignored it, then I’d have mentioned it to my DH, I wouldn’t be running out of excuses as I’d explain why I wouldn’t want to visit them, and the reason. To be honest she might be a lovely lady but I wouldn’t put myself in a position where I’d have to be in their company

Life's too short to put up with that behaviour. You need to tell your husband that you don't like the way his brother behaves to you and you won't be in his company again.

Time to explain what happened and, more importantly, how this made you feel and that you do not wish to socialise with his brother in the future. State your boundaries quite clearly.

If he minimises his brother’s behaviour and will not support you then I would leave him.

If he makes a lechy comment in the future I would repeat it loudly saying how inappropriate it is when others are around.

cornishpatsy

If he makes a lechy comment in the future I would repeat it loudly saying how inappropriate it is when others are around.

Just what I was going to say.

vampirequeen

cornishpatsy

If he makes a lechy comment in the future I would repeat it loudly saying how inappropriate it is when others are around.

Just what I was going to say.

Thank you everyone, for your advice and comments. VQ and CP both seem to think the same way that I do as that's pretty much how I now plan to react if it happens again after giving it a great deal of thought.

Why would you let it happen a second time?
Once is more than enough

Was it just one evening of inappropriate behaviour?
For the sake of your partner, I would agree to an informal meeting, and you can judge how he behaves; as you live close now much easier to leave if he shows inappropriate behaviour.
Somehow, as he has a new partner, I don't think he will.

I wouldnt want to go on holiday with them again, make your own plans well in advance which will avoid any refusals. Stay close to your OH, if bad behavior continues you will have to tell him you don’t like brothers advances.

Tell your OH.
You will feel better and your OH will never leave you alone with him.

I think you should have told your husband at the time of the incident . However, now time has passed , so has the opportunity . If he reverts back to doing the same ,tell him he got away with it last time but you have every intention of telling your husband now.
When / and if you have to , tell your husband what happened the first time but you gave him the benefit of doubt back then but realise you should have not.

Can you tell your "other half" that you only want to meet up with his brother and new partner in the daytime for tea or outings as "he's lechy when he's drunk".

That seems straightforward and is also true.
If he's inappropriate when sober, that's another matter.

Where’s that rolling eyes emoji?

Tell your husband now, and explain you don't want there to be any further opportunity for BIL to misbehave around you again. What sort of man hits on his brother's wife?! Secrecy and shame is how creeps operate! Make a resolution not to keep such things from your husband in future - it can only cause you stress and possibly put a strain on your relationship.

I think you should tell your husband the whole story as you have told it on here. tell him you let it go once but won't do so again.

This is so strange.

To go on holiday with your BIL but never having met him

To go on holiday five years ago. But not ever see him again!

He was drunk and inappropriate one night five years ago. Odd you didn’t mention to your husband at the time.
If getting together again, make a commitment to yourself not to let inappropriate pass without you commenting on it

Hellsbelles

I think you should have told your husband at the time of the incident . However, now time has passed , so has the opportunity . If he reverts back to doing the same ,tell him he got away with it last time but you have every intention of telling your husband now.
When / and if you have to , tell your husband what happened the first time but you gave him the benefit of doubt back then but realise you should have not.

Yes, exactly this. Maybe now he has a new woman he won't behave like that with you again.

Your husband needs to be told. Too many women let such things go, which gives a signal to men that it’s fine to behave in such a way. It isn’t.

That's happened to me. My wife wasn't comfortable with my brother around, He thinks he's God's gift to women and I'm sure expects women to fall at his feet.
I was aware of him before my wife told me what she thought so I'm guessing your OH knows similar without saying anything. Be honest and tell him how you feel.

Hellesbelles I think your advice is good, I would advise the same.