Crossroads

Go and help in a school or playgroup, preferably not the one your granddaughters go to. That’s a bit too needy?

You clearly enjoy being with young children. Make the most of it.?

I agree with Peasblossom do some voluntary work with children, spend time with your husband getting out and about. Don't waste this time you have when you are fit and well on being regretful.

You've hit the nail on the head, you are a nurturer and now you have no one to nurture! Your life has been about caring for others in some capacity so it's not surprising that now you're feeling bereft. You could volunteer at a school or a charity shop or volunteer to help the elderly. Or you could find things that you would like to do, just for you. Take up a hobby that will challenge you. Learn a language. Spend the time with your dh. Perhaps organise trips with him. Emotionally you need to distract yourself. You have insight into your personality which is great.

I feel similar but in my case it was looking after elderly relatives. Sadly they are no longer with us and I have to regroup to find myself again. It is quite a void.

Why not volunteer at a local primary school and support children develop their reading skills. Beanstalk is a company that deals with this , you will have to be security checked of course. That would be a wonderful asset for the school and a satisfying and worthwhile occupation for you. There is nothing wrong with you ! You miss your ' nurturing' that is understandable, but our lives change and we all learn to accommodate this. Be assured your GC will always remember their time with you , but it is time for them to move on - as it is for you. You still see them and your bond will remain - be happy ! Find some worthwhile and satisfying to fill the void. No need to feel insecure , your children and GC are doing well and you have a sound relationship with them - what's not to like !? Seems all is well , immerse yourself in some voluntary work - it is very rewarding.

It’s like a bereavement isn’t it Buonanima?
I am in a similar situation except it’s not grandchildren. I spent so long caring for my parents and they both died last year. Most of my time was taken up with them and now there is such a void, I am at a loss. My only grown up child is in a long term relationship and has his own life to live but I miss the closeness we used to have as well. It’s certainly not easy when your grandchildren fill up so much of your time. You come to depend on them for your happiness I suppose. Good advice has been given on this thread though about playing to your nurturing side and volunteering in the childcare sector. However in practice it’s not so easy at first as you will still be bereft at your loss. Bit by bit though you will become used to a new way of life and then you won’t feel so bad. You will still have a strong bond with your grandchildren. Best of luck.

I used to volunteer in a primary school helping 6 and 7 year olds with their reading. It was lovely. I got asked to help on school trips too. I visited castles, theatres, parks etc. Marvellous.

If your dh is at home on the same days as you perhaps you could go for walks or trips out together. Me and my dh will be in a similar situation to you after Christmas in that 1 grandson will be starting school and his brother who we look after will be starting nursery. We will still do school pick ups I imagine. Although we will miss seeing so much of them I hope we'll make the most of the time when the weather is good and our health allows to get out and about.

Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life!
Try to find something that you enjoy doing, even better if with your DP.
Volunteer (Every charity / group will need volunteers, for all sorts of posts, book keeping, archiving, even tidying or food/drink production) gardening, walking, painting, sculpture, photography, decorating, travel, whatever appeals.
Join your local U3A, it will have lots of activities.
There will always be something that you can do that will enjoy, and maybe help the less fortunate.