I'm hoping someone can shed some light on a difficult predicament I am going through with my sister. I have no where else to turn.
My sister who is 3 years and 10 months younger than I, has always treated me as if I have done something to her that she carries a resentment for me that seems beyond common sibling rivalry. I have practically groveled to get her acceptance and approval in hopes it would make up for this perceived slight I committed. She treats me similar to how our mother treated me, holding me to a higher standard of behavior while others in her life can get away with less.
But the issue has reached a point that I feel my back is to the wall. I ready feel she expects me to chase down a relationship with her despite her bad behavior and treatment of me and I'm exhausted. I finally gave up a year ago when she blocked me from her text, took down her Facebook and basically called me cruel. So funny coming from someone who plays mean spirited pranks on me and treats me like she barely tolerates me. So I gave up. It's too much work and I came away feeling bad about myself after spending time with her.
But there's a new development. Last October I sent her a birthday card with a gift card to her favorite sandwich shop. I texted her to see if she got it ok and no response. Either she ignored me or I was blocked. Then in December I received a Christmas card from her finally. Inside she wrote that she had been diagnosed with endometrial cancer, had a hysterectomy and has a new puppy. In that order.
I freaked out and tried to contact her but no luck. We live 2 hours apart so the only thing left to do is show up at her house. I did write her a note, concerned and offering her any assistance but she didn't answer it.
I feel now she's going to use this serious illness to run me up guilt alley and since I quit trying to pathetically chase down a relationship, she can she can cause me to worry about her without being able to contact her. It sounds all very childish but I guess I just don't know what she expects from me. She's shut me out so maybe nothing.
Hoping anyone from an outside perspective can help me. Is there something I'm not seeing? Or is she really the one who's being cruel?
Sorry this was so long.
Things you find stressful that other people don't notice.