DH’s friend made a pass at me, should I let it it go?

Interesting that you should write about this. I was in a tea room today near closing and an elderly gent started chatting up the middle aged waitress passing comments about how pretty her hair was and lowering his voice into a breathy whisper. She was obviously used to dealing with this and carried on asking him what sort of coffee he wanted completely unfazed but it was creepy to listen to as I was the only person sitting in the room. The man you mentioned sounds as if he is trying to use his charms. I was out with the WI ladies once for lunch and 3 elderly gents hit on us. We range from 65 to 85 asking us if they could join us. Our president shot some very frosty barbed comments and they shot out the door.

You already know the answer

Yes, tell him. I was out with my grandson at the local shopping centre a couple of months ago and a very elderly man shuffled up to me (a good 30 year age difference) and said 'I'm looking for a dolly bird.'

I was astounded at his cheek. I'd got a toddler by the hand! I just said, 'I'm not dolly.' and turned away.

No decorum.

Forgot to say, I told my bloke about it, who guffawed loudly.

I would have demonstrated my startle reflex.

We have a man like this who lives near us. If he can insert a sexual innuendo into a conversation he will. Silly man

Sometimes men behave inappropriately with the onset of dementia and sometimes they just think they can get away with it because they are older.

Startle reflex

Yes I ve been having trouble with a middle aged man ( lot younger than me ) making a move touching my arm and tried ti kiss my hand even asked for my address let’s just say I don’t think he ll do it again

You're over reacting. I used to take out an 80 year old to various things and he always wanted to hug me goodbye and even suggested going on holiday together! Keep out of his reach next time. Many older men are like this.

Watch R Kelly - that's all I can say

kircubbin2000

You're over reacting. I used to take out an 80 year old to various things and he always wanted to hug me goodbye and even suggested going on holiday together! Keep out of his reach next time. Many older men are like this.

I don't see why women have to put up with men grabbing hold of them in an over-familiar way, just because they're old men.

It's just disrespectful. And if he hasn't learned by now to keep his hands to himself, then he's an old fool.

As for keeping out of his reach - it's not up to the OP to be on her guard, the silly man should learn how to behave in mixed company.

sodapop

Sometimes men behave inappropriately with the onset of dementia and sometimes they just think they can get away with it because they are older.

Just about to say the same! People with dementia often lose their inhibitions and act in inappropriate ways.

An elderly lady brings her husband to our local Tesco and leaves him to sit on a bench inside while she gets the shopping. He doesn’t speak to anybody else other than older ladies and always says the same “you look lovely today”. Some women don’t mind but others give him a strange look. If his wife overhears him she quietly explains he has dementia and she is sorry.

How about an eyeroll look and a comment along the lines of 'Have you any idea how sad and pathetic that kind of behaviour is?'

Just let it go - of course. Some people always misbehave in a 'jokey' manner, others may be starting with dementia and lose their inhibitions. Tickling your ribs isn't sexual touching anyway.

Hithere

Watch R Kelly - that's all I can say

Eh?

Tolerance to sexual abuse and harassment

R Kelly is a predatory paedophile who exploited his celebrity status.
What has that got to do with anything?

Read my reply above yours

Yes, I did. I’ve read the whole thread.
I still can’t see the relevance.
You may as well have mentioned Gary Glitter.
You aren’t making sense

You also said ‘watch R Kelly’ - why?
Sorry, I must be missing something

I'm withDickens. Inappropriate touching is inappropriate, and it's not the woman's job to keep out of a touchy man's way.

Yes, why should it always be up to the woman to keep their distance etc? Women shouldn’t dress provocatively, women shouldn’t go out alone at night etc., etc. isn’t it about time men took responsibility for their own actions? From a young age boys should be taught that women aren’t there simply as playthings or someone to look after them and pander to their every need. Yes, I have a bee in my bonnet about this sort of thing. Over the years I’ve met too many women who pander to their partners/husbands every need as if they themselves were somehow second class. Getting back to the original post, yes I know some men suffer from dementia and can’t help themselves but other older men need to be spoken to severely. I’ve known my fair share of creepy older men who seem to think they can paw any woman. It’s not on. Rant over, for the moment.

From your description it sounds more like he was being a bit daft. I wouldn't describe it as touching you sexually or making a pass.
If he does it again I would suggest telling him firmly to keep his hands to himself I suspect he won't bother you anymore.