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(12 Posts)
absentgrana Thu 26-May-11 17:31:17

I have reached the point where if one more politician, celebrity, police spokesman or journalist burbles on about respect, I shall scream and hurl things. Nobody deserves respect unless they have earned it. Everybody deserves courtesy. I refuse to respect religious beliefs, although I acknowledge the rights of those who have them to practise their religion as long as it does not involve harm or interference to others. I would, however, respect a person whose religious beliefs have led them to acts of kindness, charity, generosity, sacrifice, etc. I also believe that courtesy should prevent me from being gratuitously offensive about their beliefs. How can you demand respect just because you are old? It's not an achievement, just years. Respect should be reserved for wisdom, help, kindness, things done. It's become such an overworked word and is beginning to lose any real meaning.

HildaW Thu 26-May-11 18:18:55

There is respect...that is earned as you said absentgrana, but there is also a more general tolerance or respectfullness that I am usually happy to show towards another's views or beliefs....just as long as they are not expecting me to sacrifice what I hold dear. For happy for someone to be strictly vegan...and would happily cook for them....but I would be eating my usual nosh along side them and expecting them to allow me to.

hennothefirst Sun 29-May-11 18:32:31

Love it, absentgrana! smile

absentgrana Tue 31-May-11 15:47:15

I'm not against general tolerance towards other people's views and beliefs – unless I consider them to be so extreme that they are damaging to other people HildaW and I am all for courtesy and a "live and let live" attitude. What I am against is this sloppy use of the word respect, a term that I think implies a level of admiration. Consequently, I can respect the courage of a soldier, while still being a pacifist. I can respect the hard work, skill and compassion of clinical staff while being critical of the NHS. I can respect the Queen's dedication, commitment and hard work, while regarding her role all as almost completely pointless and anachronistic. What I object to is the suggestion that you respect someone simply because…she's a woman, he's old, she's got lots of money, he's a leading religious figure, he's the political leader of a country, they've got oil, they've got guns, he's got a title, she's on television…

baggythecrust! Tue 31-May-11 16:45:25

absentgrana, I agree with you on all points. Thank you for expressing it so well.

HildaW Tue 31-May-11 17:19:42

Quite I said...'just as long as they are not expecting me to sacrifice what I hold dear'....and as I'm a regular old style moralist (well I think I'm more a treat people as you would like to be treated sort)....its quite a long list lol!

absentgrana Tue 31-May-11 18:28:30

I wasn't being aggressive HildaW. Maybe you should change your gransnet name to Mrs Doasyouwouldbedoneby – probably the most easily understandable moral figure in the entire history of English Literature. I salute you.

HildaW Tue 31-May-11 19:15:24

oooer Absentgrana......wasn't that Enid Blyton?...never a huge fan of her...and was not aware that I sounded aggressive....sorry if did!

baggythecrust! Tue 31-May-11 19:36:00

Not aggressive, absentgrana, just straightforward, as is HildaW's approach. The golden rule is golden for a good reason, and I think we're all agreed that there is no need to respect things or ideas that are not worthy of respect but that we should always respect people (even when we don't respect their ideas or what they represent). ha! Hope I'm clearer than mud. cheers to you both. BtC!x

HildaW Tue 31-May-11 20:05:05

Bless you Baggy!

Jangran Thu 02-Jun-11 14:03:17

It was Charles Kingsley, Waterbabies...

Respect - I expect respect. I don't expect to have to earn it, particularly, but on the other hand, I think I should respect everyone else too.

What is needed is equality of respect - we have a long way to go before we achieve it, though. Not least on the part of politicians, investment bankers; men in general... Well, you get the idea.

HildaW Thu 02-Jun-11 16:20:43

Jangran....was reading about a new book in Times the otherday...about psychopaths in everyday life...he claimed that many of these so called captains of Industry are 'Corporate Psychopaths'.....interesting eh?