elderly in hospital

I agree, sadly with all the comments about care of the elderly in hospital. I was a qualified nurse all my working life and the main thrust of my training was care with dignity. We washed patients, fed them and took them to the bathroom when needed. My mum was in hospital for 13 weeks and I was horrified at her care. She fell and in the time she was in hospital she deteriorated from an independent, car driving lady to an incontinent totally dependant lady. My sister and I had to work really really hard to get any level of care. Most of the time we weren't even listened to. the thing that made me mad was when the nurse you spoke to said "oh she is not my patient, I will get your nurse"............ I almost exploded each time.
Sorry ladies to go on but unfortunately it seems to happen to all our relatives. The worrying thing is we are all getting to that age.
I could go on and on but like a previous granny it makes me mad so I will stop.

All these remarks and the press about this dreadful care hits those of us who trained as nurses before 1970. Nursing took a nose dive when the old fashioned Hospital Matron was removed, also Ward Sisters as they were then. I started my nurse training in 1962 .Our training was tough, we were terrified of Matron and only a bit less of Ward Sister. The latter knew each patient and their treatment. When we started on a new ward we were expected by the end of the day to know your patient and their treatment. Ward Sister served food and noticed who had not eaten Thereby she would tell a nurse to sit and feed that patient. Bed sores were not tolerated and treated accordingly. As for MRSA that is due to dirty wards and practices. If the ward cleaner wasn't available WE cleaned the ward. Nursing has gone. Nursing now produces a degree instead of the old fashioned State Registered Nurse. I've been an inpatient and found lots that I was dis-satisfied about. I love the NHS and appreciate it, especially as I've lived in the USA, but this aspect of it is very distressing.

mamanC You speak so eloquently. I'm moved to tears. Long ago I was in hospital awaiting surgery. A very distressed elderly lady was calling out for "help" for hours on end. When I mentioned the fact that I thought that she may wish to be propped up because she appeared to be struggling to do so, I was informed that it would be a waste of time because she was an "attention-seeker". I was so disgusted by that comment and chose to sit beside her, hold her hand and stroke her hair. She remained peaceful until she eventually died in her sleep...PLEASE let us make a lot of fuss on behalf of so-called "attention seekers".

It's not just older people who receive poor care. My daughter broke her back 10 years ago, flat on her back in hospital, food would be left out of reach and one nurse told her to sit up!! when she replied she had a broken back and was waiting for an op she replied " are you sure dear"!!!
They x rayed her arm instead of her back which resulted in a delay of her back fracture being diagnosed. I practically lived at the hospital to ensure she was clean , fed and watered.
I have thought about private health care for my GS age 3 - Does anyone have any thoughts on this and the cost - will start a new thread I think.

Thank you all for replying. I know it is opening old wounds but I hope it helps to hear that others have been there too.

I think we all could write a book as you say GrandmaRose. One incident I would put in mine is one of those incidents that makes me cry and laugh at the same time. I went to visit my mother during one of her many stays in hospital only to find she had been moved to a different room far away from the room near the nurses' station where she had been when I last saw her.

I found her in a ward, hunched over in a chair dressed in a nappy, no trousers, with a faded raggy blanket over her knees. She was staring at the door,, straining to see (she was partially sighted), desperate for someon to come through the door. She was absolutely terrified, unable to comprehend where she was and she clung to me when I reached her. In the ward with her were two patients who were clearly dying.

I sought out the Staff Nurse (Yes, I thought a Staff Nurse would be a professional person, someone capable, someone to trust!) who told me, "I moved her because she was calling out all the time and she was driving me mad." I burst into tears. Perhaps that stopped me from quite simply hitting her. Seeing my tears, she said, and I quote her verbatim, " Come on, you're stressed. You can talk to me. I've done a Counselling course."

I've wanted to tell that story to the world ever since!! 'Tis one of soooooo many! Thank you for listening!

My father suffered a stroke in 1999 and was hospitalised in a very old hospital a former workhouse.

We visited him and were astounded, angry and upset to see how he was treated.

He had very poor sight and was partially deaf but no one gave him his glasses or hearing aid. My younger daughter worked with the elderly and she got very angry when we were there and a porter came and just let the back rest down which meant dad went backwards very quickly and got frightened. Daughter told them there was always the option of touching dad and saying what they were about to do.

We went in another day and the floor by his bed was wet as was the bed and his pyjama jacket.The oxygen tank was leaking and fluid was flowing across to the floor and to the bed. I mentioned it to the staff nurse and a nurse appeared saying, 'what's he done now?' I said, HE hasn't done anything the oxygen tank is leaking and you should feel lucky YOU didn't slip and hurt yourself! She looked embarassed but sorted it out.

then dad complained to us about a pain in his chest. He had told the staff but apparantly nothing was done. So I told them and they said, 'Oh yes he keeps saying that!' Next they did an x-ray which resulted in a load of fluid being removed from both lungs.

However, they then decided to transfer him to a rehabilitation centre.The doctor there said he couldn't understand why he had been transfered as he was too ill with pneumonia and it was impossible anyway to rehabilitate him. Within three days dad died.

Mum was too upset to complain and wouldn't allow me to either. My younger daughter was so outraged at her grandad's treatment it was not long before she gave up her job and went back to college she had lost all confidence in the system.

No you are not being unreasonable and sadly this has been going on for years both in hospitals and care homes. Too many nurses today are lazy, simply don't have any vocation or any concept of a duty of care. This come down to lack of basic care from nurses and so-called carers. I have first hand experience of this.

I could write a book about the appalling care that my mother has received by the so-called caring professions. My mother has been in a care home for almost five years ago, suffering from vascular dementia. About two years ago she fell in the home and broke her hip. When she was returned to the home about 6 weeks later she had a broken arm and her replacement hip had dislocated for the third time. She is unable to walk, is doubly incontinent, unable to speak coherently and doesn't recognise me. I have been unable to get any extra funding for her despite all her disabilities. In about a year's time the money from the sale of her home will run out and I guess I shall have to deal with all those faceless departments all over again and whether she will be able to stay in her care home remains to be seen.
MamanC, I understand all the anger and frustration all to well. I'm afraid I am being an ostrich and burying my head in the sand because I just can't bear to deal with these bureaucrats all over again

Oh it does help though when someone else echoes your feelings!! Thank you goldengirl!

Oh, mamanC how I feel for you! My parents lived 200 miles away from us so I was 'caring' from a distance and it was a battle from day 1. I had to fight for them every inch of the way both to get a decent care package to keep them at home for as long as possible and proper care when they eventually had to go into hospital - an experience from which neither recovered.

I found dealing with social services, the DWP and other involved organisations an absolute nightmare - and yes, I did speak up. Part of my weaponry was to do my homework - a fact that was noted by one of the many social workers - but it certainly took its toll on my own health. Banging heads against brick walls were the order of the day. It seems that people's needs are forgotten amidst the dreadful bureaucracy. And as for communication between organisations........forget it!

The more I think about it the angrier I get, which is not productive and so I'll stop!