Values

I like your post, tiggy . No need to duck. It's mrbags who has the Hunters in oor hoos. They are lasting better than his last pair of cheaper wellies. My wellies are so old I've no idea what make they are but i also have neoprene and rubber Muck boots because for winter wear they are warmer. I use them most days because we live in a muddy place. I've had them several years too.

SusieQ my mind is boggling about why expensive branded wellies are any cuter than any other wellies. Had I heard that response I would not have been able to keep my mouth buttoned. What a sad young girl.

Quite frankly I would not give Hunter wellies house room - narrow fit and wear out quickly. They used to be good but it's only 'the green wellie brigade' who want them now to go along with their Chelsea tractors.
Should I be ducking for cover at this point ?!

Oh this does strike a chord, but luckily not relating to a family member!

I worked with someone who would only wear Calvin Klein jeans, denim is denim for heavens sake! And I know others who if you say that's a nice jumper/coat/pair of shoes will say " thank you, it's (insert designer name of choice)

The phrase "knows the price of everything and the value of nothing" comes to mind.

How lovely to come back from work to see that so many people are pretty much of the same opinion as me on this. There were mixed opinions in the office with one young woman saying brand wellies would look so cute - she was wearing what were apparently Jimmy Choo shoes herself.
From various posts, it seems that a compromise would be to send a contribution and then they can either buy a cheaper pair or make up the difference themselves.
Thanks very much, Grans

OMG a 2 year old in expensive wellies what is the world coming to?
I would flatly refuse to pay that.

I really find it incredibly sad and disturbing that so many younger people are so "hooked" on brand labels with no reference to the cost or actual quality, or the fact that kids can outgrow their clothes in a very short while.

While one wants clothes to look good what is the point of spending vast amounts of money on clothes to be quickly outgrown.

I have been very impressed by the lovely clothes in ASDAs children's range.
My DGS get loads of baby stuff from a slightly older cousin.

I hate wasting money on clothes or toys that DGS will not be using so now I always ask DD what she would like me to buy him. For Xmas its a Little Tykes car which cost £50. That's enough.

Hunter wellies? No, just no. If they want those for him, give them the money to buy them and tell them they aren't a Grannie Xmas gift as he won't know any different and give a small appropriate toy or book from you, or even money for a children's savings account, if they have one.

Good luck!

This is a problem I chicken out of - just send the parents some money (for the children".)
They're scattered all over the world, so it's too complicated to send personal presents.

Having now got two sons my daughter is prepared to spend more on clothes etc. for the older one because she feels she'll be getting value for money as they'll be passed down to the younger one.
I have a budget for children and grandchildren, so I always say what the amount is and ask if there's something particular needed. My daughter tells me what she and the children would like and that's what I buy. Recently she told me what I might buy for my son in law for Christmas, but my husband has taken charge of buying that particular gift and gently asserted his right to choose for himself.
I think in your shoes suzieq I would bite the bullet and buy what you've been asked for this year, but be prepared for next year so that you can say you've already bought gifts when the subject is broached.

My DD1 who is divorced dresses DGS in clothes from various shops and supermarkets. Her ex keeps a whole wardrobe for DGS to wear when he is with him as he has to wear 'labels.' Dgs has actually said that he prefers his 'home' clothes as they are more comfortable. He likes to help choose his clothes but is not bothered where they come from.

I have a very thoughtful DiL whom I usually ask what I should get for the children. Her own parents, who are more affluent, buy more expensive gifts and I don't in the least resent this. One present I sent GD, which proved the most successful ever, was a set of fabric pens and two plain white tee shirts. I chose that one myself because I happened to see the pens in Lidl and then ordered the tops from Ebay. The children are brought up not to set much store by labels and have always had second-hand bikes - often from Ebay.

Eloethan My DGS is one of those that at 4 can recognise several brand names. In fact he can recognise supermarket staff uniforms too., and a domino pizza delivery man when we passed him in the street ! Not something for DD to be proud of in my opinion

It's not about the wellingtons, it's about the perceived difference in values. I thought it was interesting that the DIL was thought of as joining 'our' family, but of course the DS has also joined 'their' family. I have faced similar problems over the years in my own family and have resolved this by reminding myself (many times over) of exactly what is my role and responsibility as a grandparent. I have come to the conclusion that this consists of helping out the parents whenever I can - babysitting and the like - and continuing to give my DGS the message that I love him dearly and think he is a great little chap. It is not part of my role to educate or re-educate the parents. For example, my DS and DIL are terribly houseproud, so that all toys must stay in my DGS's room and a mess must not be made. I am not at all bothered about those things, and of course I have a view about their attitude, which I keep strictly to myself. When at my house, my DGS realises that the 'rules' are a bit different, and of course their is no parental objection to making a mess in my house! I think you can only influence by example, quietly and in the background.

Ridiculous price to pay for something she's going to grow out of PDQ.

A sad story about the lady and the dolls. Is it just me then that consults with parents over what to buy DGC ?? I always ask for ideas and inform DD what I'm buying so that other grandparents or mum n dad don't duplicate.

I'd buy some really 'awful' Peppa Pig, In The Night Garden wellies as the child would probably prefer those to 'smart' Hunter Wellies.

Children are well known for having no taste. I constantly remind my daughters of the pink and purple, flounced ra-ra skirt that they all adored (and insisted on wearing when I took them out ) until they became more discerning.

I didn't know they made Hunter wellies for toddlers. It's bad enough having to pay that kind of money for well-fitting shoes, but that's a necessity. Posh wellies aren't essential to keep their feet warm and dry.

There's being right, and then there's doing right.

My daughter was very tomboyish and as a little girl, she would give all her dolls away. Even ones that her grandparents gave her. At the time I didn't stop her, and now she asks me why I didn't!

susieq I suppose the thing is, even if you can afford them, you see it as a waste of money, which I do too. I also think it's a bit cheeky to ask someone to pay £40 for a pair of boots. However, I'd probably be inclined just to buy them, rather than cause any possible ill feeling about it.

When the opportunity arises at a later date - perhaps when having a conversation about fashion/clothing, etc. - I'd casually mention my own views about the buying of fashion labels for children. Branding is a way of indoctrinating children and preparing the ground for them to be loyal consumers. Research has shown that children who are too young to read can still recognise several brands.

That does seem a shame then, brenda, but if the kids they were intended for "didn't like that sort of thing", it's not totally unreasonable to refuse them. Possibly kinder to accept them and then make them disappear fairly quickly though.

That is sad Brenda especially when she'd taken the time to knit clothes for the dolls. Some people are keedless of the feelings of others aren't they?

No they were, what I would call, traditional dolls about 15" tall.

Just asking because not everyone thinks they are lovely.

Were they Barbie dolls by any chance?

We had a lady come into the charity shop with two lovely dolls in their boxes, obviously new, plus two shoe boxes of wonderful knitted clothes for them. She explained that she had just spoken to her DiL who informed her that the dolls would not be suitable for the DGD's for Xmas as they did not like that sort of thing. The dear lady bought it to us to sell. She was clearly upset. What is it with some people that a, they can be so unkind and b, that a 'name' is more important than love.

The Hunter wellies are very soft and pliable, but a ridiculous price for toddlers.....I was tempted to buy them for my GD as parents have hunters and some boots are very rigid for small people . M and S have some which are almost identical except of course for the label!!!
I would be honest and tell her they are too expensive !!