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Distant family

(9 Posts)
LyndaT Tue 12-Aug-14 13:49:14

Self pity is the most unattractive emotion but I am indulging myself today, having said goodbye to my elder son, pregnant wife and 19 month old grandson as they fly back to Melbourne after my younger son's wedding. I thought when I retired I would be able to visit them, travel and so forth, but I have developed progressive MS and I don't think I will be able to make the trip to Australia again. My Aussie daughter I law is one of three children, all settled near their parents in Melbourne. It seems so unfair. I am an only child, as is my husband, and I miss my family more than I can say.

tanith Tue 12-Aug-14 13:54:32

I do feel for you LyndaT having also a grandchild living abroad but Australia is so far and not being able to visit must be so desperately sad. Do you manage to keep in touch via skype or telephone?

LyndaT Tue 12-Aug-14 13:59:56

Indeed yes, weekly Skypes, emails every couple of days, and so forth. I can't complain about their loving attentiveness. One has to learn to settle for less and absolutely never complain! Just not what I ever expected.

janeainsworth Tue 12-Aug-14 14:20:15

Yes it is hard Lynda. You're doing absolutely the right thing by accepting what you do have and not complaining.

My son and family are in the States which is not so daunting as Australia I know. It does get a bit easier as time goes on and the children can talk to you on Skype.

I hope your son and his wife are able to come to the UK reasonably frequently.

henetha Tue 12-Aug-14 22:40:41

I feel really really sorry for you as I know how much I would hate that situation. Emigration can cause the most dreadful heartache and I sometimes think that it should be banned therefore! Although communications are so much better these days it's still not the same as actually living near them, is it.
But airlines are very helpful these days in helping ill or disabled passengers to achieve difficult journeys, so I do hope you can manage to visit them.
And I do hope your family will understand your situation and come to see you whenever they can.
I do wish you all the very best and send you my good wishes.

Coolgran65 Tue 12-Aug-14 22:56:29

LyndaT - I understand only too well, I have one son who is married and living in west coast USA. We visited to meet new grandson of 8 months, a couple of months ago. I am happily married (son's stepfather) and have 3 stepsons who care for me, and 2 (step) grandchilren here. I love them all dearly but still ache for the one who isn't here.

Aka Tue 12-Aug-14 22:59:08

I know how you feel Lynda (((hugs)))

LyndaT Wed 13-Aug-14 10:54:26

Thanks for all the cheering support. What a great army of long-suffering grannies we are! I am out of the slough of despond today, having been for a swim and given myself a good talking to...We wanted our children to be successful, adventurous and independent so must not complain when they are! But the main thing is they are happy, of course.

ffinnochio Wed 13-Aug-14 11:30:56

That's very good to hear LyndaT. The tender days won't disappear, but you have described a very successful way of approaching long-distance grandparenting. flowers.
By embracing my children and their families happiness and making sure I live my life as interestingly and as well as I can, I find this is a good enough way to be. I often think that being apart at such a distance has brought us closer together.