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To think that my BiL should stay at home this year?

(7 Posts)
kittylester Sun 31-Aug-14 18:38:03

DH's brother has suffered from rheumatoid arthritis for over twenty years and has had most of his joints replaced at least once. He is 74 and quite determined/pig headed. In late June/early July, he had one of his knees re-replaced.

Since he retired, every summer he has driven to southern France towing a folding caravan, leaving my lovely SiL behind with the dog and her garden (she is quite happy with this situation - in fact, probably, enjoys the break grin). He is usually away for 6 - 8 weeks and Sil flies to meet him at the end of his journey and, after a few days, they drive back together. He feels that the heat gives him a bit of a 'start' for the winter.

We heard a couple of days ago that he has just left, for a month, but hadn't been able to get any insurance.

The complication is that their unmarried son, aged 47, has terminal cancer of the pancreas and liver. He has been having chemo and responded well but last time Bil saw him he was very yellow and they 'were giving him a rest' from the chemo.

DH is livid that his brother has gone so soon after his op and considering the situation with his son. I suspect he has visions that he will be the one called on to collect him if anything happens to the knee and I will be the one to help Sil if anything happens to DN.

Nonu Sun 31-Aug-14 18:58:36

This is a difficult situation KITTY, families eh!

I send good Karma to you and yours .


thatbags Sun 31-Aug-14 20:04:31

Stable door, bolted horse comes to mind. Sympathy for how your DH is feeling, kitty. On the face of it your BiL's behaviour does seem a little self-centred. How does your sister-in-law feel about it?

kittylester Mon 01-Sep-14 06:34:58

My Sil is being stoical . They have been married over 50 years so she was s used to his ' little ways' grin

FlicketyB Mon 01-Sep-14 12:42:01

Once people like that get into a pattern of doing something every year, especially for their health, they get too set in their ways to change it, no matter what the reason.

I bet he is a man of habit who has set ways of doing things in all aspects of his life and hates having his routines disturbed.

Galen Mon 01-Sep-14 13:40:56


kittylester Mon 01-Sep-14 13:43:07

This one in particular Galen - though their elder brother is dafter grin. I think I've mentioned the Thai bar girl before! grin