Good morning all. Hope all is well with you and yours. Yes, it's Valentine’s day again, folks. Pat and I no longer celebrate it very much.. other than a nod to recognize the date. Want to know why? Please read on… Please note that each of my “poyems” comes complete with its own Oxford English health warning. Many perfect vowels and consonants have been ill-treated in the production of this work… for which I make no apology. My writings are specifically aimed at a North-Eastern audience, or at those who have an interest in regional dialect. So criticise the quality of the verse or of the dialogue by all means, but to complain that “it’s not in proper English” is to rather miss the whole point of it… Yes dear reader… that has really happened..
“Ye hev te laugh, man…” :-)
Be Me Valentine.
As Valentine’s comes roond again, an’ florists rub thuh’re hands,
An’ Hahllmark cards fly off the shelves, though there are other brands..
Ah’ve looked back at it’s origins, an’ though it seems pedantic,
Ah’m here te tell yez that it’s roots are far from bein’ romantic.
In ancient Rome thuh had a feast, thuh cahlled it Lupercalia,
So strange te us, it’s rites teday would be a total failure.
As men would kill a goat ‘n dog, then take the bloody hide,
An’ whip thuh’re willin’ women, as what it signified,
Was an increase in fertility, an’ te consummate the rite,
Thuh would draw lots fer a partner, with whee thuh’d spend the night.
Then Claudius the Emperor, whee thought his’sel Divine,
Had a Christian executed, whee’s name was Valentine.
In later years the Cath’lic Chorch made Valentine a Saint,
An’ distanced that new Saint’s day from it’s Lupercalian taint.
Original romantic links remained associated,
Though ancient Roman customs were noo happily oot-dated.
As time passed by the cause was aided by wor poets here,
Such as that well-knahn Chaucer, an’ that famous Will Shakespeare.
Romantic verse was popular, an’ in sugar-sweet display,
Hand-made paper cards became love tokens of the day.
The centuries unfolded, an’ in 1913,
With Yankee mass-production the forst Hahllmark cards were seen.
An’ noo it’s ahll big business, an’ wuh hev te take the blame,
As that early Christian feast day will noo nivvah be the same.
Ah suppose there are some pluses, as wor partners get a gift,
An’ a luvly bunch of flooahs gives relationships a lift.
But ah cannat help but thinkin’ in me ain auld-fashioned way,
If yuh’re love is true then what ye’ll do is show that evr’y day.
Ah divvent need a special day te tell that lass o’ mine,
Shuh’s had me heart, reet from the start, me year-roond Valentine…
