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AIBU

AIBU to expect the shop to close ?

(110 Posts)
Izzywizzy Thu 18-May-17 18:44:12

It was business as usual at our local supermarket but as I walked in I sensed all was not well. I decided to go and get a coffee and as I was paying I commented on things not feeling right. She replied by telling me that a man had just died and that the staff were upset.

I then realised that what I had been looking at was a make shift 'screen' around the poor man. The screen looked like box sides opened up so we couldn't see him but it was only about knee high.

The man had been there for an hour she said and during this time shoppers did their shopping with most of them having to push their trolley very close by him to leave the shop.

I felt quite upset knowing this man was just feet away from me as I supped my coffee and decided to leave the store.

What I would like to know is AIBU to expect the shop to close for an hour or so while the shop waited for the undertakers to arrive ? Surely this man deserved some dignity and the staff also needed some time to get over what they had just witnessed ?

callgirl1 Fri 19-May-17 00:15:36

Yes, the store should have been closed, but if this was not possible, a higher screen should have been put around the gentleman.
A few years ago, a friend of mine was in town with her dad when he collapsed. She dialled 999, the ambulance came, they certified him dead, then left, saying that they weren`t allowed to convey a dead person, they did, however, help her to get him into her car, and she drove him to the hospital herself. She was extremely distressed over it.

norose4 Thu 18-May-17 23:02:46

As far as I am aware if a person has died,an ambulance does not take them anywhere. An undertaker does that.

When my Dad died in an hospice at midnight, we had about three quarters of an hour to get our own undertaker, or the hospice would contact one of their choice to take his body away, & although they were very sympathetic about it they were also very firm .

Anniebach Thu 18-May-17 22:32:50

Do ambulances remove a corpse ?

thatbags Thu 18-May-17 22:31:17

How easy would it be to close a supermarket unexpectedly and at an unusual time? Not very easy, I should think, depending on how big a shop it was and how busy. I don't think it's right to assume that whatever managers were on duty acted out of callousness. They may have felt that not making a fuss (such as closing the shop, which would have to be explained) kept the incident more discreet than not. I'm willing to give them the benefit of the doubt.

BlueBelle Thu 18-May-17 22:23:41

We don't know the ins and outs of the case or why it took an hour but the main thing is he wasnt lying having a painful heart attack in some secluded spot with no one around to find him or help him I d far rather fall to the ground in a crowd than in a lonely area or alone in a house and not found for days or even weeks There often is no dignity in death .....or being born that's just how it is
Say a prayer for the man and don't bear the burden of how he ended life, look after yourself, he's sounds as if he was outside any pain from the first moment he fell to the ground if only it was this good for us all .... each person who witnessed it will have a different reaction and each must find their own way forward don't dwell on it izzy

trisher Thu 18-May-17 22:12:26

I'm surprised they didn't cordon off a larger area around the body. He must have died well before the ambulance arrived. If the crew had thought there was any chance of saving him they would have taken him to hospital. It would have been more thoughtful to restrict access to the aisle.

Izzywizzy Thu 18-May-17 22:02:46

An ambulance was outside the shop and as it happened I looked at them and they were chatting so I thought that they had just popped in for sandwiches. The cafe assistant said they tried to save him even the air ambulance attended so absolutely no complaints there.

I agree with the comment that the shop should have closed to new customers and the shoppers inside could then be guided away from the poor man as they could then go out of the shop the way shoppers normally go in. This wasn't a huge supermarket in a city,it's in a small market town and I'm saddened that people carried on buying their every day food around a dead body. He was next to the self service and they kept it open !

I feel better for talking about it here so thank you. But it's not about me,it's about that poor man and his family. And a money grabbing supermarket.

Ana Thu 18-May-17 21:23:01

I've seen one several times at our local supermarket, but they just go in to buy sandwiches...(I know because I've watched them!)

Jalima1108 Thu 18-May-17 21:08:53

A doctor must have been called to pronounce that the poor man was dead.

I have seen an ambulance arrive at our local supermarket on more than a few occasions and hoped that whoever required it was treated with speed and recovered.

Ana Thu 18-May-17 21:08:16

Thanks for the link, Jalima, it appears I was wrong - still seems odd that there was such a long wait for the undertakers to arrive.

Christinefrance Thu 18-May-17 21:07:11

I agree with BlueBelle, keep everything as discreet and low key as possible for the poor chap's dignity. I think the paramedics probably had other calls to deal with and this chap was beyond their help.
Brings home the fact of our own mortality.

Ana Thu 18-May-17 21:05:29

They just wouldn't do that - for a start they don't have the authority to pronounce death, or the cause of it.

Jalima1108 Thu 18-May-17 21:04:24

bereavementadvice.org/topics/what-to-do-when-someone-dies/in-a-public-place

I think, even if they did not shut the store completely, they should have made a much better screen around the deceased and shut off that area of the shop including the cafe.

Sorry you were so upset Izzywizzy and it must have been upsetting for the staff too.

Ana Thu 18-May-17 21:03:50

I have never heard of such a thing before - so the ambulance crew arrived and pronounced the man dead, then just left him on the supermarket floor...hmm

vampirequeen Thu 18-May-17 21:03:05

I don't think you're over reacting. They could have stopped further customers coming in and those already inside could have finished their shop then be directed to an exit away from this poor man.

Jalima1108 Thu 18-May-17 20:58:32

So what about the post-mortem - does the undertaker take the deceased to the hospital mortuary?

norose4 Thu 18-May-17 20:57:07

Ps an ambulance cannot take a dead person away, as it has to be intensively cleaned if a person dies in ambulance, so if a person has already passed away it passes onto an undertaker.

norose4 Thu 18-May-17 20:54:16

So sad to read about this, not sure what else could have been done. A quote from the bible popped into my head from my way back Sunday school days , which says ' in the midst of life we have death ' & as we have brilliant ambulance personnel & undertakers plus the staff doing their best in the shop I'm sure they would have treated this gentlemen with dignity & care. May be a small shop would have closed,but a bit more difficult perhaps for a supermarket . Hope you are ok Izzywizzy, you sound very compassionate, a very distressing situation to witness ,big hugs

Jalima1108 Thu 18-May-17 20:51:29

He could not just be taken away by an undertaker; surely an unexpected death like this would require a post-mortem?

Jalima1108 Thu 18-May-17 20:49:04

I was going to say the same as Ana - surely the ambulance crew should have removed him to the hospital for the death to be certified by a doctor?

Ana Thu 18-May-17 20:40:50

I'm amazed that the ambulance crew would just leave the man's body in the supermarket to await removal by undertakers.

I thought death had to be pronounced by a doctor, not a paramedic. Very odd.

rosesarered Thu 18-May-17 20:33:19

Not sure about people dying ( though it probably happens) but a couple of years ago, while supermarket shopping, a well dressed man about 50 clutched his chest and fell to the floor near me.I rushed over to him and shouted at a nearby assistant to get somebody.I thought the staff were very slow off the mark in coming over and a bit leisurely considering it was a likely heart attack.Anyway, I left him with three of them, and a bit later an ambulance arrived and they took him away on a stretcher.I hoped he was alright, the girl on the till said 'it happens all the time'.
However, it does seem callous izzywizzy for supermarket life to just carry on around a deceased person.

Iam64 Thu 18-May-17 19:55:34

It sounds like something that would upset most people izzy. Do something restorative this evening. (that probably excludes watching 3 girls - which I've found the most harrowing tv programme I ever saw)

Elegran Thu 18-May-17 19:32:47

I think they could perhaps have put a higher screen around him than a knee-high one. Supermarkets have these "wet floor" notices to close off an aisle, and big mesh trolleys that they collect recycling cardboard in - a few of them across the aisle would have screened him off.

BlueBelle Thu 18-May-17 19:18:28

I don't think a shop could clear everyone out without making a big hoohah I would imagine it was kept as discreet as possible and hopefully everyone got their shopping thought about the poor gent and left
I guess death effects everyone differently but from my personal point of view I would have felt sad for the gent but very practical knowing not everyone dies or gives birth in a perfect place You can be on a train that stops for someone on the line or in a car with a fatality ahead death it's not always neatly sleeping in bed Anyway a nice way for the chap to go quickly and with not much knowledge probably
Don't be upset Izzywhizzy he was looked after he wasn't alone and he was covered from view and it sounds as if it was fairly instantaneous better than some deaths for sure