To hav3 had enough of Harvey Weinstein on the radio

I am sure that for everyone who feels they can Iam there will be many other who still feel they can't.

I wonder how many are wracking their brains trying to recall an unpleasant chat up line so they can say - me too

I wonder how many of us would reply - me too?

"Women and men across the country are participating in the social media campaign #MeToo to raise awareness for sexual harassment and assault.

It started on Twitter, where actress Alyssa Milano encouraged women to reply "me too" if they had experienced sexual harassment or assault "to give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem."

In just under 24 hours, the tweet garnered nearly 48,000 replies, with the movement also taking hold on other social media networks."

me too....

GG, no one has blamed victims but I do not believe all women who claim abuse are victims.

In honesty can you claim there has never been false claims of abuse? We recently had a thread of a woman who claimed she had been raped by several men, one man served a prison sentence , she was found to have lied .

I really believe some women want fame so badly they will be willing to have sex for the chance of a step on the ladder of fame .

I also believe there are men who think women are on this earth for his sexual pleasure .

In this case I don't believe all the claims . Why if he found it so easy to interview women in a hotel room or an office did he stalk the Anthony woman to here home ? Why not an hotel room as others have claimed

I will await the findings of the police forces, I hope he doesn't get off with anything he is guilty of but I also hope he isn't found guilty on a false allegation.

GracesGranMK2, I don't think anyone here victim shamed or victim blamed. The predator was blamed.

Unlike some on here, Annie, I blame no one but the perpetrators of these crimes but I am ashamed of the comments made by other women who blame the victims and therefore make life less safe for all.

Just a word of support for Gracesgran who seems to be on the receiving end of a level of criticism here that isn't in my view justified. She most certainly did not suggest that mothers are to blame for their sons behaviour.

I'm struggling with some of the judgemental comments about other women, about 'lifestyles' that many have criticised but they have the right to live as they choose. That's exactly the line taken by many agencies and individuals towards the young women/children involved in making so called lifestyle choices when they were being groomed and sexually exploited in Rochdale. Strong personal boundaries are one thing, cold and critical comments about women who make serious allegations another.

I don't think the point to Mayim's piece was to blame the victim for the man's behaviour.

Not all men are lecherous , some are. Not all women are easy lays, some are.

Then GG, you are placing blame on the mothers for not teaching their sons how to respect women?

GGMk2. I am not in favour of teaching women to fear the world. However if a girl is about to have a sexual relationship I would advocate giving her contraceptive advice and in my opinion a warning about predatory men if a girl is fixed on working in the film industry is just as important.
This isn't about women in general. I have often posted about women's right to live as they wish. I live in a city where girls and women have lifestyles that many have criticised. I think they have a right to live as they choose. But if I had a daughter who wanted to be a lion tamer I would want her to have the best advice and the best training to survive. I wouldn't want to send her into the ring thinking tigers were something like pussy cats.
I don't see how you have brought up your son has anything to do with this unless he is a producer in the film industry.
The link was interesting SueDonim but I thought a bit inadequate. Personally I have very strong boundaries and personal space issues and I have met quite a few women who have tried to give me unwanted hugs when we met. fortunately I think they soon realised my boundaries. It also isn't just men I avoid on public transport there are quite a few strange people I prefer not to sit near and I always try to stay away from groups of teenagers of both sexes.

Thanks from me for the link too Sue. It tells a sad story and I am shocked to here people on here endorse the culture of paranoia instead of putting the responsibility where it lies - with anyone who chooses to be a predator.

Iam I am so sad that we seem to still defer to the actions of men. I know some wonderful men - including my son. When I brought him up he understood that he is not entitled to whatever he chooses to take from a women. That is surely what women must do. Not teach our girls to fear the world. I do not understand why people think it is okay to criticise and blame the victims; it is perverse.

All this concentration by a few on the behavior of women. As I said, the more we do this the less safe we will actually be - but you are right, it does give those who write such things the opportunity to be smug.

Thank you for reporting what Maggie Oliver said. Let's face it, she knows the actuality of the situation.

Mayem Bailik is entitled to her opinion, which has been roundly criticised for victim blaming.
There is something unutterably smug about the notion that if bring our daughters up to avoid make up and manicures and tell them that if they work in Hollywood men will all be after only one thing - that somehow we've solved the problem of predatory men.
Teaching young women that if they modify their behaviour they will be safer doesn't always work does it. So many young women assaulted and victimised despite the fact they'd modified their behaviour and taken safe steps.
The issue is the abusive men, the men who seem to think they'r entitled to take what they want whenever they want it. I was criticised earlier on this thread, unfairly in my view, accused of suggesting all men are potential rapists or child abusers. Nothing could be further from my own work or life experience.
I heard Maggie Oliver the former GMP detective involved in the GMP and Rochdale cse cases interviewed on Radio 5 earlier. She made the comparison with the girls she supported being accused of responsibility for their own abuse, with the same being said of young actors.
Thanks for the link SueDonim, it spoke to me as well

I'd have thought it better if miscreant men modified their behaviour. It seems to me that it's always women who are having to budge up to accommodate others.

I know people on here don't always like links but this from the BBC spoke to me today. www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-41614720

I am not on my 'high horse' trisher, I am angry. I am a women and I totally resent you undermining everything we have achieved toward being treated as equal.

Your comments leave every woman vulnerable and cannot tell you what I think of other women who do that.

Oh GGMK2 you are on your high horse aren't you. I fully understand what consent is and I fully support women wearing and doing what they please. However when you have an industry which exploits women for their looks, judges women on their appearance and ranks women for their sex appeal you also have to warn women that if they buy into this concept they may be damaged. That damage may take the form of a loss of self confidence, it may result in them submitting to surgery or it may result in them putting themselves in harms way. This doesn't mean rape is justified, this doesn't mean assault should be ignored, this doesn't mean any sort of harm shouldn't be dealt with. It does mean that women have to be adults and recognise how the people (and they are mostly but not exclusively men) who run the industry will treat them if they allow them to do so.
Mayem Bailik is a woman who was involved in the industry as a child who has had success both then and now as an adult. She is entitled to her opinion and she is a powerful voice and a role model for other actresses. Understanding that "No" always means "No" isn't really much consolation to a rape victim. Teaching young actresses that they will be safer if they modify their behaviour at least offers them some protection. But I suppose if you are only concerned in scoring points and pretending to be more informed than anyone else the actual safety of these women doesn't really concern you.

someone who

I am beginning to think that it isn't only men who don't understand consent!

Trisher, please watch this video - it shows what consent is and what it isn't. It does not mention what someone is wearing; it doesn't mention if you wear make-up; it doesn't mention of you have manicures. It does say that the responsibility lies with understanding what consent is.

Having sex with someone - or sexually harassing someone who has not freely GIVEN consent is illegal. If you do this you are breaking the law. If you do this with someone who someone who is provocatively dressed, wears make-up, or has manicures, you have STILL broken the law. THEY have done nothing wrong.

If you follow your path to it's natural conclusion trisher, you will put all women in burkas on the grounds that men cannot be expected to obey the law. Why should we conclude that? Why do you think they are so infantile that they cannot be held to account for what is, quite clearly, THE LAW. Stop making excuses for men for heavens sake or they will happily continue raping women and saying it is their victims fault - because you are enabling them to do just that.

Tea and Consent

Loved the comments from Mayem Bailik (hope I've spelt that properly) and her parents summed it up.
"I always made conservative choices as a young actress, largely informed by my first-generation American parents who were highly skeptical of this industry in general — “This business will use you up and throw you away like a snotty tissue!”— and of its men in particular: “They only want one thing.” My mom didn’t let me wear makeup or get manicures. She encouraged me to be myself in audition rooms, and I followed my mother’s strong example to not put up with anyone calling me “baby” or demanding hugs on set."
She has been accused of victim blaming but I think she just sees things very clearly. It isn't excusing the men just explaining how she felt she needed to protect herself.

www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/harvey-weinstein-big-bang-theory-094800960.html

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/3061617-I-think-the-golden-rule-for-men-should-be?trending=1

My DDs find this to be the answer to much.

Great when a thread can move on to some sort of consensus.

Yes Iam, I think everyone here who has experienced unwanted advanances are aware it happens in the world