Table Manners

I was at a rather posh dinner recently, most of the people there were wealthy but half of them couldn't hold a knife and fork properly. I am neither wealthy nor posh but I do know I have good table manners. Clearly, it is not just young people who have been dragged up!!!

Now that I am old and shaky I use a spoon a lot of the time
As long as the food gets from plate to mouth why worry.

"Phone for the fish knives Norman....." (from 'How to get on in Society' by John Betjeman). Having, like many other Gransnetters, been taught table manners as a child in our very humble household, I do agree wholeheartedly about the practice of holding a knife like a pen. Whenever I see people eating on TV I always note how they hold their cutlery - it can say a lot about the eater! And another thing... I was taught to lift my fork and spoon to my mouth rather than stick my head down towards the plate...

I agree with MOnica...English ‘meat and two veg’ gets strictly eaten with knife and fork with prongs pointed down ...sometimes turned up to make life with peas and sweetcirn easier to deal with especially for youngsters. Pastas ...curries... anything ‘sloppy’ can be eastern with fork in whatever hand suits . Meals are now flexible, and eaten them needs to be the same.Tbd only thing I insist on is manners. No getting up and leaving the table before you’ve asked and then there needs to be s a good reason for doing so.Cleaning away your own plates and putting in dishwasher or on work surface if dishwasher is full. I’m nanny not a servant.

GabriellaG stop it! It's not nice to correct someone! and what is a pleb?

Nanny41
Fork with tines up (concave) when laying table.
Fork held convex (tines down) when using it to eat.

I actually had to get a knife and fork out to figure out how I eat... I push onto fork with knife and also scoop with fork...it depends what I am eating. The fork is very versatile...it's design proves that.

It's Gabriella (two 'l's) and I think it's ok to point out that one word would suffice. People often get 'discrete' and 'discreet' mixed up. How are they to know if no-one tells them?

I was taught good table manners both at School and at home. Fork with the concave side up, knife held not like a pen but tucked into the palm of my hand.When meal finished leave the knife and fork together in the middle of the plate.
In the Country where I live everyone uses their knife as pen, very irritating, after their meal they leave their knife and fork anywhere on the plate, it seems to vary a lot .
They slurp when drinking, no matter what they are drinking, a noisy nation in many ways! Its their way.

wildswan16

The 'correct' position in which to place both items of cutlery when you have finished eating, is at either 5 or 7o'clock.

We were also taught that knife and fork are placed together, facing north south on the plate when you are finished eating.
Any uneaten food is scraped neatly to one side.

Not left at random angles.

The worst case of bad manners I've seen was in a local steak restaurant. A young couple were both glued to their screens. Their meals arrived. The girl stabbed her steak with a fork, lifted it whole and chewed on the end of it. Meanwhile she was texting with her other hand.

My 3 hated being corrected for bad table manners.
My pet hate is knife licking?.
However whilst working overseas as an 18 year old my son had a British colleague who had dreadful table manners.
It was the first time he had lived in close proximity to someone with poor manners, he was unable to sit opposite her at mealtimes so had to sit next to her.
On his return home he thanked me for instilling good manners

I use the fork with the prongs turned downwards to "stab" the food and put it in my mouth. I never balance food on top of the prongs because it's bound to slide off and land in my lap!

What gets me is when people leave bits of food smeared all over the plate when they have finished eating. I was taught to scoop all the food up properly so as to leave the plate as clean as possible when I had finished.

Gabriela G: it is rude to correct other people's grammar, (unless you are teaching an English Language course).

Oh gosh I didn’t know there was a right and wrong way to use cutlery and I’m 67 ?

Out for a meal with family, grandaughter aged 7 at the start of the meal noted her cutlery was not present.
Top of her voice, "Where`s my fork `n knife!"

MOnica
Discrete means individual/separate so no need to put both words.

I'm in total agreement with your comment.
There was a recent programme showing a collection of chefs at a formal dinner. Their table manners were, for the most part, appalling. Forks held, tines uppermost with elbows at 90 degrees, piling food into their mouths and leaving cutlery splayed at 20 past 8 when they finished. Plebs.

My pet hate is children eating with their mouth open. I say a ;boy of about 9 or 10 who turned out to be home educated and he had the most awful table manners, stabbing his food and eating and talking at the same time. awful.

I don't care. I only dislike if people are noisy eaters or get food in their moustache.. yuk! ....or make a noise with cutlery hitting the plate!

Put..not out!!

The best table manner rule is "don't be greedy & don't out others off their meal"

. It is horses for courses, so to speak
Hors d’oeuvres? .

What does it matter which way up the fork is used, provided that the user doesn’t chew with their mouth open, or eat noisily, or cover their clothes with ‘dinner medals’?