Cooking for all needs...

I agree it makes things difficult. I turned pescatarian 4 years ago after being behind a load of pigs being taken to slaughter in a 2 hour traffic jam. Now at Christmas or other family meals I bring my own stuff and just eat the veg. That's the ethical choice and it can be hard for hosters - I used to cook meals for 12 which were easy - a roast or a casserole - yum!

However one of my relatives can't eat chilli because of a medical condition. Some of the GC in the family have serious allergies. Both my DCs (born 80s) will eat anything but have friends who would die if any nut is in what they eat, even carrying epipens.

For all the inconsiderate people up post, it's not a fad if you have a life threatening allergy, or an ingredient which lays you low for a considerable time. No one currently knows what the trigger to the rise in allergies has been over the last 40 years - it could be additives, farming practices and pollution, changing medical advice (eg GMC now think babies should have peanut butter smeared on skin or lips at 6 months), changing foods (when did peanut butter come in?)

Clearly there are some precious people who make everyone's life harder by claiming to have allergies when they don't - not least because they give rise to this sort of thread and get truly allergic people a bad name.

But if you have a family with no allergies, no ethical choices and no food types that precipitate problems, then just count yourself very lucky.

If you do, ask them to bring the food they'd be happy with.

A vegan dish for everybody, avoiding recipes that contain any spices, nuts, sugar, gluten, seeds and alcohol should cover all the bases. You ought to be able to find some vegetable dishes that would do. You don't mention pulses, so a vegetable pasta, made with gluten free pasta and lentils in it ought to be ok. Moussaka? There are many types of soy or quorn based mince now ( though some of it isn't vegan, so check before buying).You can get loads of dairy free milks and cheeses now for the sauce. A shepherdess pie made with mushrooms and lentils? A bean stew?

Dessert sounds like it has to be fruit for some, but those who don't need to avoid sugar or gluten can have vegan cake ( many recipes on line!) or a fruit pie with soy custard. Fruit salad is lovely though, and you can buy dairy free cream and ice cream now. Most supermarkets have both. Also soy and coconut yogurts.

I am vegan myself, so whenever I have family over, the meal is all vegan. They all enjoy it. But, unlike you, I don't have to worry about anyone's allergies - that must be a trial. Vegan is easy when there are no concerns about bad reactions to any of the ingredients. But if you enjoy cooking and entertaining, this is a challenge to bring out your creativity!!

Some of the things you list are clearly dietary preferences and ethical choices not allergies.

I wouldn't, say, not cook a chocolate dessert just because someone doesn't do chocolate. Just offer them fruit as an alternative.

To stipulate no dairy except butter and cheese is bonkers. No red meat apart from wild game? I’d be interested to know the reasoning behind that.

I’m not even going to use the terms vegetarian or vegan because of some people’s very fluid interpretation of what those terms mean only to say that it is very easy to cook delicious, nutritious, plant-based dishes. There are many, many recipe books out there backed up with online recipes. Hugh Fearnley Whittingstall’s Veg is a good start point.

www.rivercottage.net/recipes-in/veg

?

I'm completely with you. Luckily my family will eat most things except DDil who dislikes lamb.

It’s awful these people who self-diagnose isn’t it Monica?

Well, I mean medically proven, hence the epipen, rather than self-diagnosed.

I didn’t realise that the NHS approved of certain allergies ?

Well, all the allergies in my family are all NHS diagnosed and approved. Including an adult developing life-threatening allergies in her 40s following a diagnosis of an autoimmune disease.

Allergies were rare when I was a child (1940-50s), but I certainly remember people/children having allergies to strawberries/eggs/prawns. I also remember Boots selling food for people with coeliac disease. I have had a life long penicillin allergy and can remember having skin rashes from dyes in clothing and things like that.

^ Sick to death of all these supposed intolerances (allergies are, obviously, another issue)^
Fine

But me and mine will not come to eat at yours as we would probably spend a night vomiting due to gf intolerance which is an autoimmume disease and not due to fussy eating habits, and could lead to other diseases.

Thanks anyway.

Allergies can be fatal - intolerances are something else altogether - and I'm sure some people confuse the two things. I do wonder about the massively increased numbers of people with a) allergies (thinking of nut allergies in particular) and b) intolerances in recent years - I know what my theory on the subject is (see my last post), not to mention I think modern parents are raising a generation of really fussy eaters

I was born 1958 so grew up in the 60's. Like all babies back then I was weaned at recommended 3 months on mashed up rusk and milk or a bit of soft boiled egg yolk or fine cut porridge oats sweetened with a bit of honey. As I grew up the vast majority of families like us ate good plain seasonal food, shopped for daily or thereabouts and cooked from scratch. I stayed school dinners too and we all ate the same main meal and pudding as the only choice was seconds of main OR seconds of pudding if any was left. Again all fresh and cooked from scratch in on site school kitchens. I honestly cannot remember anybody I went to school with, or was in my dance school, brownie pack etc that ever had any kind of allergy. I do wonder if, as a couple of previous comments have pointed out, late weaning and the proliferation of lifestyle diet choices have led to the rise in allergies. I wonder too if SOME (not all) of these people claiming to have an allergy are just fussy eaters and it's easier (and more fashionable) to say you are allergic to something rather than refuse it or admit to not liking it.

Just do vegan! Or something like Jacket potatoes/salads/sandwiches/burgers etc where they can choose from a buffet and have what they want. Don’t cook fancy food and it’s much easier. People are there for the fun and company not the food.

Pecs , my DH has to be careful with bread. He is not intolerant of gluten but gets a migraine from breads which contain a mould inhibitor and a flour improver ( though ascorbic acid as an improver is fine). In hotels he has been known to take in his own bread for breakfast.
As you say, out and about is difficult and while the rest of us might tuck into a sandwich he will have a frusili bar!

.....you did say ‘include’ ...

Exactly that Maw plus chillis and a couple of others.,

Not “deadly nightshade”! ??
Common “nightshade” vegetables that we eat include:
white potatoes, tomatoes, aubergines, bell peppers, cayenne pepper and paprika

I usually buy unwrapped loaves so inredients less obvious. I stick to what I knowis OK for me but if out and about.....

Take your pick PECS (try saying that after a . If you read the ingredients on bread labels it does make you wonder.

What we actually need is serious research into the causes of the apparent increase in intolerance to various products. I do not think my intolerance to bread is gluten based as I can often eat bread with no ill effects at all and yet some flour based goods floor me! Additives? Refining process? Type of flour?

Nightshades come in several forms PECS!

I think people need to understand the differences between a severe anaphylactic reaction, an allergy and an intolerance and all the degrees of reactions these can trigger. I wish I had the privilege of just being able to eat ‘just a little’.

We recently booked to attend a slap up meal in a very upmarket venue. An email came back asking about food requirements for the booking and I replied that we eat anything.
On arrival we were again asked about our food preferences.
After drinks on being taken to our table AGAIN the maitre D asked about allergies, intolerances etc.
This resulted in us having a long conversation with him about the latest trend where everyone has a list of (possibly imaginary) dietary requirements.
He, like us, eats everything and said that this trend has made life so difficult for restaurants. I believe that it is attention seeking in a great many cases.

Anja I would not serve deadly nightshade!
Intolerance is different to allergy. I , as many people do, have intolerance to various products. If I am going to someone's home and they are cooking for me so we can share a good time together I make sure I do not eat any foods that can aggravate me for the days prior to to the visit. This enables me to eat at least a little of what is on offer. If I was allergic to foods I would tell the host.

I can’t understand those who are intolerant of others food choices. It’s fairly easy to cook a couple of dishes which are acceptable, or get everyone to bring a buffet dish if you’ve got a crowd.

I’ve found that cutting nightshades out of my diet has drastically reduced flare ups of arthritis. Rather than be thought of as one of Lilyflowers ‘picky eaters’ I ate the lasagne served up by my lovely SiL. Sure enough within 24 hours I couldn’t walk or drive due to the pain and consequently couldn’t do the school runs. This caused great inconvenience for a whole week to my family as they rely on me to do this.
So much for being ‘rude’